Years ago I was on a journey to find like-minded Catholic friends. I had been meeting with a small group for a few years but never quite connected on a deeper level about our prayer and desires for spiritual growth. Our small group time was really just filled with talks about life in all its comedies and tragedies, but it never quite got to the point of vulnerability in how the Lord is working in each one of our lives.
It grieved me every other week that we weren't quite able to go "deeper." I longed for it, but I never quite knew how to *make it work.*
I felt the lack of solid, encouraging friendships in so many ways: in the sufferings of my marriage, in my insecurities as a mother, in my lack of discipline when it came to prayer, in my attachments to various vices and sins.
I yearned for faithful, edifying friends who asked me about my relationship with the Lord in prayer, for women who looked through my surface-level appearance to what was going on deep in my soul. I longed for intimacy in friendship that would translate into deeper intimacy in my prayer life.
I knew the value of community. I had seen it in others' lives. And I wanted a taste of that connection and vulnerability.
The Power of Connection
As we come to know the Lord, we recognize there is immeasurable value in walking this road with others. As Christian women, we are called to support, encourage, and uplift one another on this journey, and I know so many of us (dare I say all?) long to walk alongside another woman, to have someone who gets what it means to live for Jesus and Him alone.
I longed for others who wanted to live radically for our Lord, to set aside all the cares of the world, and to follow our Savior wholeheartedly and unashamedly.
How to Begin a Small Group
It can be scary to put ourselves out there in this vulnerable way, but I know without a shadow of a doubt that if you're feeling called to it, the Lord will protect you. He will guide you, He will hold your hand, He will light the path.
So here are some steps on how to get started if you're longing for a Catholic small group:
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Pray for Guidance: Begin by seeking His heart through prayer. Ask the Holy Spirit to inspire and guide you as you embark on this endeavor. Trust that God will lead you to the right women to join your group and provide wisdom in structuring your meetings.
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Define Your Purpose: Clarify the purpose and vision of your small group. Are you focusing on spiritual growth, study, support, or a combination of these? Identifying the mission will help attract like-minded women and provide direction for your gatherings.
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Choose a Format: Determine the format of your meetings. Will you follow a structured study guide (like Blessed Conversations), engage in prayer and reflection, or incorporate a combination of activities? Tailor the format to meet the needs and interests of your group members. A perfect place to start is by hosting a Blessed Brunch, which is simply an avenue to open the door of your home and your heart to other women in an easy format using our helpful resources.
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Select Meeting Times and Frequency: Consider the schedules of potential members when selecting meeting times. Whether you meet weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly, consistency is key to building community. Choose a time that allows women to prioritize attendance and participate fully.
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Promote All Ages and Stages: Being a part of small groups where women of all ages and stages come together and vulnerably share with each other what's going on in prayer and in their lives is powerful. You can provide wisdom to each other, asking for dependence on the Holy Spirit's promptings and guidance. It's okay if there are women of different vocational paths and phases of life, that is the Church!
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Provide Resources: Gather resources such as bible studies, study guides, or online materials to support your group's discussions and activities. Our Small Group study guides, Blessed Conversations, are a come-as-you-are resource. No need for prep or homework, they will provide a theologically sound and natural way to deepen your walk with the Lord and each other.
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Create a Safe Space: Foster an environment where women feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, struggles, and prayer intentions. Encourage confidentiality and mutual respect within the group, allowing each member to authentically express themselves. Be sure every person knows that what is shared in the group stays in the group.
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Emphasize Prayer: Integrate prayer into every aspect of your group meetings. Begin and end sessions with prayer, and incorporate opportunities for silent reflection, intercessory prayer, and communal worship. If one woman shares something deep or something she's struggling with, offer to stop the meeting and to pray with her right then. The Lord will work through your surrender and courage.
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Extend Invitations: Spread the word about your small group through word of mouth, social media, parish bulletins, and local Catholic organizations. Invite women who may benefit from the fellowship and spiritual nourishment of your small group. Large groups of women can be split into tables of 8 or 10 so then there can be multiple small groups within one larger group.
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Evaluate and Adapt: Regularly assess the effectiveness of your group and be open to feedback from members. Adjust the format, topics, and activities as needed to better meet the evolving needs of your community. Most of all, adapt to the promptings of the Holy Spirit. He knows what is best for you and your group, and He will guide you along the way.
What You Will Gain
Over the years I've been a part of various small / large groups, and no matter the format, no matter the study, no matter the group size, it's always been fruitful if our hearts are oriented to our Lord. If we pray beforehand and afterwards, and especially in the middle, we will have served our purpose—to be women who walk with other women along the way to Heaven.
If you feel called to start a small group, be assured of my prayers. The Lord is not calling you by accident. The subtle (or not so subtle) promptings along the way are real, you're not making them up! Follow His lead, because our Good Shepherd will not lead you astray.
I pray these steps are helpful for you as you trust in God's guidance, and I hope you can create a vibrant community where women fall deeper in love with the Lord as they grow in love, faith, and fellowship.
SMALL GROUP STUDIES
We invite you to share your heart with other women using our Blessed Conversations small group studies. They're beautifully accessible and thought provoking, perfect for a small or large group.