How shall I make a return to the Lord for all the good he has done for me? // Responsorial Psalm
He laid there with a complete awareness of his destination. I was only twenty years old and in complete denial. I sat next to him there on the bed, and he reached gently for my hand. He began apologizing for all of the things he wouldn’t be able to do for me.
Affection didn’t come easily to my father. He was one of eight and, as the oldest, culturally a lot of the responsibility fell on his shoulders. I never held it against him because he didn’t have a childhood.
My father was preparing to meet His Creator and in his last hours, he used his breath to apologize to me.
“How shall I make a return to the Lord for all the good he has done for me?” (Responsorial Psalm).
At that moment, I certainly couldn’t see the good in the words my father was offering me. I didn’t have the capacity to pay attention to the reality that he was at peace with all that the Lord had done for him.
This love poured out onto me from my mom and dad as a visible sign of the good He has done for me.
The Lord doesn’t have an I-O-U policy. “How shall I make a return to the Lord for all the good he has done for me” (Responsorial Psalm).
Even in that moment with my dad, how could I repay the Father for showing me His goodness by delicately preparing me for something I wasn’t prepared for? This painful love that my dad displayed to me is a mystery. There was no remorse in his voice; on the contrary, there was a deep intimate love that my dad was trying to convey to me. I realized that I can cooperate with God to use the sufferings and hardships I have experienced to open my heart in gratitude for the good He has done for me.
Sister, as we continue to celebrate in His glorious Resurrection, let’s return our gaze at Him on the Cross and return all the good He has done for us.Love poured out. // Mytae Carrasco Wallace Click To Tweet