Too Much and Not Enough

As I sat on the worn couch in the student lounge, my cheeks became red and I felt the others’ eyes boring holes into the back of my head.

As a new college freshman, I sat with my student orientation group while we watched a football game. Heading off to college was scary enough, but making new friends? The scariest. As we watched the game, I was giddy with nerves and excitement at finally being there. I was chatty, animated, enthusiastic, and loud. My nervous energy was finally releasing, and I felt at ease.

But, then the looks started. I noticed others eyeing each other with that, “Isn’t she annoying?” look on their faces. They were smirking and chuckling to each other. And it took me a few moments to realize that I was the source of their amusement. I clammed up and stared straight ahead, mortified and lonely.

I spent the first weeks of college trying to gain my footing. In those initial meetings, I felt too loud, too weird, too nerdy, too much. I focused on class and figuring out this new schedule and how to live on my own. I ate lunch alone. I felt too much and not enough.

But I eventually made some friends just as weird as I am, just as nerdy, just as ecstatic to be there. I finally felt a sense of belonging.

In those early weeks, I had forgotten that I was called to belong. I wouldn’t be on the outskirts forever. I just needed to find my people. In today’s reading, Saint Paul reminds us that we are all called to belong to Jesus (see Romans 1:6). We are His people.

Be weird for Jesus.

Have there been times where you felt like an outsider? When have you felt like you belonged? Take it to Jesus in prayer for a reminder of Whose you are.

We are His people. // @substance_soulClick to tweet

listen to today’s devotion