From time to time, I get a case of the "I don't wanna" when I think about the adult responsibilities on my plate. I don't want to spend an hour paying all the bills, or calling about trash service, or scheduling doctors' appointments. I don't want to take my truck in for an oil change. I don't want to make time for Confession instead of staying all day at the beach. And while I’m being honest, there are also times when I don’t want to, because I don’t feel qualified, do the hard things God is asking of me. I don’t want to carry the cross.
Neither did Moses, when the Lord first called him. Moses asked God if someone else could go, if someone else could do the talking. Nevertheless, he obeyed and followed the Lord. Now in today's First Reading, Moses actually did set up the dwelling space for the ark of the covenant. (Exodus 4:16)
Even—and especially—when the odds may have seemed against him, when God's will seemed crazy, Moses obeyed and faithfully did the work. Even when the tasks may have seemed meaningless, or like someone else could have done them, Moses did as the Lord commanded.
Moses' faithfulness to the task made him a more steadfast servant of the Lord. His steadfastness resulted in God's will being carried out, and his steadfastness set him apart. Faithfulness like this leads to righteousness, and as Jesus tells the people in the Gospel, the angels will separate the wicked from the righteous. (Matthew 13:39) On the last day (or any day), I want to be seen as one of the righteous, one of the faithful servants who carried out God's will in my life.
So when I "don't wanna," I will do anyway. I will pray for a more willing heart, and put my best efforts forward. May God who was faithful to Moses increase my trust in Him, and may my life be lived so that when Jesus comes again, He counts me among the righteous, as a servant who lovingly followed His will.
If you don't want to do the things you must, you're not alone. Be encouraged by your sisters here in our community. Be assured of our prayers.
Gina Fensterer is a Colorado native at heart, but the West Coast beach life suits her just fine. She currently lives in small coastal area of California with her husband and six children. She loves the Jesus prayer, coffee at any time of day, homemade salsa, photography, and sleepy toddler snuggles. You can find out more about her here.