I fail and fall short. I mess up time and time again. I sin, confess them, and sin again. And yet, He never tires of me. His pursuit never ends. He constantly calls me into His loving presence and embrace.
It's so easy, isn't it? To be our own worst critics. To beat ourselves up because we can't seem to get things right. Or quit the sin. Or continue down a path we know leads us far from Him. It's so easy. Too easy.
And yet, His compassion wipes out our offenses. He washes us from our guilt. His desire is to cleanse us from all sin. I want so deeply to be made new. I desire a clean heart and pure spirit. And sometimes, it's me that stands in the way of His love and mercy. The shame, the guilt, the false truth that I can never be enough for Him keep me at bay—far from Him.
And yet, He calls to us. Beckons us to draw near. And in my shame, I continue to walk a different way.
But, in this moment, in this prayer time with Him, I am reminded that each moment that I have is a moment in which I can choose to turn around. So that He may turn my eyes, my heart, my mind, my body, my soul back towards Him. So that He may cover me with His mercy, compassion, and generous love.
I am left speechless in these moments. He sees me—in my failures and shortcomings and sinfulness—and wants me anyway. And so I turn back to Him. I approach Him as He spreads His arms wide to embrace me. To welcome me home. And it is here, in His presence, that I am made new. In these moments, I am reminded that our God is a generous Father. Waiting always to receive His beloved back to Himself.
His love and mercy cover me. There is no distance too far—I can always return home.
Need a refresher on going to the Sacrament of Confession and a good examination of conscience? Right here on the blog!
Shalini Blubaugh is a Minnesota transplant living in Denver, Colorado with her sweet husband, Matt, their gal pal, Callan, and quite large GSD pup, Sully. She enjoys all things health + fitness and pizza, because #balance. Shalini graduated from the University of Minnesota – Twin Cities, served with NET Ministries, and went on to attend Law School. She graduated with her J.D. and happily leaves all things Law behind! Some of her favorites include travel, re-connecting with old friends and making new ones, the ways in which God so beautifully brings all things full circle in His time, and a good, loud thunderstorm. Find out more about her here.