"I have waited, waited for the Lord." // Psalm 40:2
I’d been in my university position for fourteen years. I loved my job, my colleagues were like family to me, I worked with brilliant, faithful authors from around the world. My soul was fed. Most important, my desk hovered over the altar in our chapel where the students held Adoration every Monday. Very few lay people are blessed with this exquisite gift, to work where the Eucharist is in repose.
But I was beginning to travel and speak more, my writing required more time in prayer than ever, opportunities for women’s ministry, work I was deeply drawn to, were opening before me. If I were to answer the call to this work, I had to give up my “secure” job—and reliable benefits, like health insurance. I have major medical concerns, expensive ones, and my husband’s work doesn’t provide benefits. It was no small thing to release this decision into the hands of the Father.
So, my husband and I prayed and trusted. We consulted wise friends and priests who offered affirmation and support, we paid attention to the repetitions, the needs of the women who were finding me, and slowly we came to the decision that it was time for me to let go of my university work—in order to respond to the Lord’s call.
When we are in periods of discernment, we can have confidence in God’s methods, His repetition, the confirmations that come to us from wise and very prayerful, holy people. In today’s reading, God doesn’t call Samuel over and over because Samuel is a dunce—but because he wants Samuel to know it is indeed God calling. The Lord helped Samuel along through the wisdom and experience of Eli. After repetition and wise counsel, Samuel freely replied, “Your servant is listening” (1 Samuel 3:19).
When you’re looking for direction, listen—listen hard, listen a long while, listen to the wisdom of the holiest ones around you, ask for intercession, seek confirmation, and look for moments of repetition. Have confidence that the Lord wants you to discover His will and respond in freedom.