That Painful Face to Face

I closed my eyes in prayer, and after a few minutes, I imagined Jesus with me. I spoke to Him about my day and in my mind’s eye, He placed His hands on my cheeks and gently turned my face towards Him. He asked, “Please, look at Me.” Surprisingly, I couldn’t bring myself to look into His eyes. I pleaded, “Don’t make me look at You.”

My unexpected anguish troubled me, but Jesus patiently waited.

Slowly, I looked into His eyes and saw my own reflection in them. It was me, but it didn’t look like the me I see in a mirror. It was as if, for a moment, Jesus allowed me to glimpse at the me behind the layers and the masks I hide behind. He saw the beauty of my soul. He saw all my potential and all that He called me to be. I sobbed.

This prayer happened over a year ago, yet Our Lord continues to bring me back to this moment in prayer. It reminds me of today’s reading, “I fostered them like one who raises an infant to his cheeks; Yet, though I stooped to feed my child, they did not know that I was their healer” (Hosea 11:3-4).

I was frightened to let Jesus truly see me, even though He is my Healer.

How many times have we felt ugly, unworthy, ashamed, or anxious to look into the eyes of Our Savior? Yet, with hands upon our cheeks, He beckons us to turn our faces to Him. His burning love sees the God-given beauty within us. He sees our strengths and the weaknesses He desires to overcome.

On this Feast Day of the Sacred Heart of Jesus, Our Savior wants to refine our hearts with the fire of His love. It is painful to come face to face with our demons and our flaws, but it is only through this purification that we are formed into women who will change the world.

What is Jesus trying to show you that you have not wanted to see?

He is my Healer. // Bobbi RolClick to tweet

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