Losing Him in the Crowd
Losing Him in the Crowd - Blessed Is She

It feels like standing in a thick cloud of woodsmoke. I gasp and choke, trying to find air but there’s not enough oxygen. My heart races, my thoughts become mixed and jumbled, and I become overwhelmed with a strong need to flee or fight. I set my phone down and walk away from it, the headlines, and the influencers causing the panic attack.

It hadn’t always been that way, but about a year ago I had a genuine desire to grow in empathy. I wanted to understand different perspectives, opinions, and experiences. It was a good desire, one that grew from my beloved Catholic faith. But somewhere along the line, my peace and I were swallowed up by the arguing, shaming, and snappy comebacks.

I thought I was focused on Jesus, but I had actually lost sight of Him in the loud crowd. So a few months back I unfollowed over one thousand accounts. I muted many, many more. I sought out silence so I could sift through things in the presence of God.

I tended my home and garden. I read books to my little ones and played board games with the big kids. I drank hot coffee on the front porch with my husband. I attended Adoration and dug into my Bible. And then I stepped out of my home and mentored, donated, and served others in my community. I found that when I was influenced by the Lord, His Church, and Sacred Scripture I finally had the ability to not only see but to actually care for those who were afflicted.

What do you need to do to refocus and protect your peace?

[bctt tweet="Be influenced by the Lord. // Bonnie Engstrom" username="blessedisshe__"]

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