After the Angel Departs

Then the angel departed from her. // Luke 1:38

During my sophomore year at college, I was invited by a friend to attend Mass on a Tuesday, to which I responded, “There’s Mass on a week day?” We barely went to church on Sundays growing up, so this was news to me, but very welcome news.

A fire for my faith had been ignited with the introduction of Catholic Social Teaching combined with a vibrant Sunday Liturgy with a standing-room-only chapel filled with classmates who were at Mass because they chose to be. The flames burned brightly, and my thirst to learn more was paradoxically insatiable and more than satisfied by the love of God all at once.

I joined a small group, went on my first retreat, and spent Friday nights sharing meals with friends experiencing homelessness. My friends and I frequented daily Mass, monthly Festival of Praises, and prayed night prayer regularly in the chapel we had 24/7 access to.

My faith flourished in college. But college doesn’t last forever.

Leaving the friends and ready-made opportunities that constantly encouraged the deepening of love of both God and neighbor was incredibly challenging. Having my rose-colored glasses removed and being exposed to the sin and destruction caused by clergy and other members of the Church and navigating those realities away from the community that I depended on was jarring and painful.

But ultimately remaining faithful was a choice that could only be made on my own. It was hard, lonely, and confusing (and still can be at times), but God is steadfast, forgiving, and patient.

I wonder if Mary felt similarly when the angel departed after her fiat. Could she have had a moment of loneliness when the only other created person aware of this miracle left her side? Surely it would have been easier to explain her pregnancy to Joseph with the angel there, encouraging and affirming her love of God.

If not Mary, there are certainly other examples of Saints who have felt alone or even abandoned on their path to Heaven. Dear Jesus, please help me to remember their example in those moments the angel departs in my life.

God is steadfast, forgiving, and patient. // Sarah RoseClick to tweet

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