Why Am I So Annoyed?

And his commandment is this: we should believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and love one another just as he commanded us. // 1 John 3:23

Seeing her name on my schedule, I inwardly rolled my eyes.

Oh, this lady again, I lamented to myself. My patient had scheduled another office visit appointment with me to discuss the same issue—again. I’ve lost count of how many consultations we’ve had about the same issue. Each visit is much the same. She explains her chief concern, I explain my findings and diagnoses, she states she understands her condition and her options and we make a plan for her next visit together. She leaves in good spirits.

But then she returns and it’s the same conversation, the same outcomes. I have tried diagrams, videos of options, plastic tooth models, “Googling” images together. I see the lightbulb turn on and I think: Yes, that’s it, you’ve got it! 

But after multiple visits of the same song and dance, her name on my schedule annoys me. I have maintained my patient and calm demeanor at each visit, given her my full attention, answered each question, and yet today, my inner spirit was frustrated and irritated. 

AGAIN? I seethed inwardly. What more can I do!?

But I felt that small tug on my heart and asked myself: Why am I so annoyed? I realized how ungenerous and unloving I was towards this woman. The Lord commands us to love one another. PERIOD. 

He didn’t say to love one another as long as they aren’t annoying or as long as they act in a way deserving of love or only if they agree with us. He commands us to love one another, just as He loves us.

I am sure I am annoying sometimes—or frustrating, or disagreeable, or one of the many other shortcomings I display on a daily basis. I take something to prayer, find peace with the Lord, and then question Him later more times than I can count. But I am wholly and unequivocally beloved by the Lord.

Sister, when you feel your annoyance or anger or irritation bubble up under your skin, I invite you to pause and let the Holy Spirit fill those spaces in your heart. Love that annoying coworker, love that curmudgeonly neighbor, love your messy roommate, love your forgetful spouse.