Thus says the LORD: You say, "The LORD's way is not fair!" Hear now, house of Israel: Is it my way that is unfair, or rather, are not your ways unfair?” // Ezekiel 18:25
“It’s not fair!” my son exclaims. He is four years old and has a high sense of justice, fairness, and equality. However, he has yet to grasp the idea that his siblings are different ages and have different needs and how we parent each child varies depending on emotional development.
But to a four-year-old, everything has to be fair. Or else we hear the cries of injustice and I believe he will lead the charge of our kids unionizing. On this particular sleepy Saturday morning, my husband and I were attempting to get our youngest to use the toilet. Potty training is definitely in my top five least favorite parenting requirements but, alas, it must be done. And rewards with candy ensued.
“Why does he get candy and I don’t?! It’s not fair!” my son demanded. I explained that his little brother was learning a new skill and we would reward him accordingly. But foot-stomping and rage-against-the-parental-machine commenced and our morning turned chaotic.
I listened to his frustrations and validated his feelings, but held firm. Each of our four children are different; they have different needs and are at various developmental stages. We parent them in the ways they need as individuals.
Some days my patience wears thin and I just want to throw in the towel—give the kids what they want, when they want it—so I don’t have to hear any more whining. But I hold firm and take a deep breath and let them rage, stomp, and shout to the heavens about how unfair their mother is.
And I am the first to admit that I do the same thing.
Sister, you may foot-stomp at the Lord and ask why me or why is this happening. Or the classic, it’s not fair! But in His endless patience and Fatherly wisdom, He has uniquely designed His path for you. Let Him know your feelings; He’ll hold you close. And He can take anything you give Him.
Le Dr Samantha Aguinaldo-Wetterholm est épouse et mère de quatre enfants et pratique la dentisterie dans un centre communautaire de santé publique pour les familles à faible revenu de la Bay Area, en Californie. Elle pense (sans vergogne) que la crème glacée est son propre groupe alimentaire et ne quitte pas la maison sans porter des boucles d'oreilles scintillantes. Elle a contribué à All She Had . et le livre de prières de dévotion de nos enfants intitulé Rise Up . En savoir plus sur elle ici .
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