A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to be silent, and a time to speak. // Ecclesiastes 3:7

My mind wandered off thinking of all of the possible responses I could give this friend. Her text message hurt me. She informed me that we could no longer be friends as it seemed to her that I did not have time to nourish our friendship. My first response was anger: did I not have a say in this? Why had she made these assumptions? Life was in its busiest season for me and I was trying to navigate so many things, including long-distance friendships.

I wanted to react in my frustration. But instead, thanks to the light of grace and the movement of the Holy Spirit, I humbled myself. I asked the Lord for wisdom to know what to say. I waited. I was silent until I knew my heart was softened, filled with compassion for this friend who was also hurting, and I listened to what the Lord wanted to say to her . . . and to me. 

Then came the time to speak: I apologized for how I had made her feel. I shared with her that she was never a burden to me but that I valued her friendship. I told her my door would always be open and that if she wanted to be friends again, I’d be right here. Time passed and she remained silent. When she would come to mind, I could only say a prayer for her. Then, one day, she finally wrote again, apologizing for what she had done. A friendship that had been broken was coming together again. 

I pray that the Lord would help me time and again to grow in the art of knowing when to be silent and when to speak, that I would be “quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19). Pray with me, sister, that the Lord would teach us in His school of wisdom, especially through the intercession of the Saint the Church honors today. 

Saint Vincent de Paul, lover of the poor and of charity, pray for us, that we serve the Lord through loving others with the willingness, patience, and zeal you modeled for us. Amen.