Mother, Teach Me To Be Your Daughter

I was sitting in my room and praying during a time of difficulty in my life when I realized something about my attitude toward our Lady. I realized (without trying to do so) that I had put her on a pedestal that I could not touch. I loved the Rosary and I loved the consecration to Jesus through Mary. I loved her. But regarding an intimate and maternal relationship, she felt very inaccessible.

These thoughts led me to speak a prayer that instigated an entire change in me: “Mother, teach me to be your daughter.”

The moment I said those words goosebumps came all over me, and I felt a blossoming intimacy with her that I had never experienced before. It made me realize the magnitude of the gift of her motherhood, and the example of holy womanhood she is to us. She, the ultimate Woman, is the perfect example to learn from and guide us ever more deeply into the arms of Jesus. I was inspired to look deeper into her virtues as contemplated by the saints, five of which I want to share with you today as inspiration for imitation:

Mary’s Humility

We often hear women are receptive. We see this tangibly in the makeup of our bodies, with the capacity to receive and potentially bear new life. We see it when we’re on a coffee date with a close friend receiving the other’s heart. We see it in our prayer life: listening, passive, receptive. It’s part of our feminine makeup, and it was part of our Lady’s too. Her humility was the foundation of her receptivity; there must be an emptiness and a lowliness to make room to receive fully. Her example reminds us to pray for the virtue of humility to accept little humiliations throughout our day as practice, and to trust God when we are in a season of being emptied.

Mary’s Faith

Our Lady had perfect faith in every moment: giving birth in a stable in Bethlehem far from home, in the small and hidden moments of homemaking in Nazareth, even during Christ’s ministry that led to His crucifixion, where her sorrows were overwhelming. In all things she remained unwavering in faith, trusting in God’s goodness in all circumstances. Faith is a virtue we cannot practice or cultivate ourselves. It is a pure gift that we must pray for, and a prayer that will always be answered because our Father always wills our increase in it.

Mary’s Unceasing Prayer

Mary’s whole life was a prayer: her acts of service, her works, her laughter, her sorrows, her silent prayer and meditations. Why? Because every moment she lived was according to God’s will and without the stain of sin. She inspires us to consider our time, and ask ourselves: What is it God is asking of me in this moment, on this day, in this season in my life? When we consider this, we can more intentionally seek to do His will. In His will, each moment of our life also becomes a prayer. Our joys, our sorrows, our sufferings, our trials, and even our weakest moments offered to Him become a means to draw closer into intimate union with God.

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Mary’s Ardent Charity

In perfect imitation of Christ, our Lady held nothing back. She was readily willing to pour out of herself because she was moved by the Holy Spirit to a fervent, ardent, marvelous charity, or love, of God and neighbor. Because of this she lived a life with a heart unhardened, a heart that felt the greatest capacity for both joys and sorrows. She inspires us as women to remain sensitive and pray for healing in the areas within our hearts that have hardened over time, so that we too might love with our greatest capacity.

Mary’s Wisdom

Our Lady’s wisdom is a reflection of her beauty as a woman: “Resplendent and unfading is Wisdom” (Wisdom 6:12). She shows that true beauty stems from the heart and reflects externally into acts of love. Mary’s maternal guidance is rooted fully in heavenly wisdom. She will never lead her children astray, nor will she abandon us. Her gentle prompting echoes: “Do whatever He tells you” (John 2:5). Wisdom, like faith, is a gift to pray for; it is experiential, fostered over time, and guided by the Holy Spirit working within us.

As I dove into the writings of the Saints on Marian virtue and sought to grow in deeper relationship myself, I found a mother so eager to be close. A Queen-Warrior in all of her perfections looking towards each of her children with a gentle gaze. Loving us, and there for us intimately. She is such an inspiration for all women that I could not help but write it all down. It led me to write a book, Mary, Teach Me to Be Your Daughter: Finding Yourself in the Blessed Mother. And my prayer for you, dear sister, is that you, too, can find your place as her daughter.

Author Bio: Megan Madden is a homeschooling mother with a passion for writing and speaking on authentic femininity and virtuous womanhood. In 2017, she began graduate studies in marriage and family at the International Theological Institute in Austria. After moving to Kraków, Poland to work with university students, Megan more personally continued her research on the complementarity of man and woman, particularly on the question of what it means to be a woman. She delved into the study of renowned Catholic writers on women such as St. Edith Stein, Gertrude von le Fort, Alice von Hildebrand, St. John Paul II, and St. Teresa of Avila.