“Not as man sees does God see, because he sees the appearance but the LORD looks into the heart.” // 1 Samuel 16:7
I had an image come to me in prayer of an empty cell. An austere place with cold stone walls and not a single window to let in the sunlight. Amid the silence of this lonely cell, I called out to Jesus: Lord, can You be with me here?
With these words came a flicker of light, and soon the room was filled with the warm flames of candlelight. Jesus was present, adorning the cell, and transforming it into a beautiful room. A place where I would find rest. A place where I would find peace. A place where I would find Him.
In prayer I asked the Lord what this place was. And He answered: Your heart, daughter. This is your heart.
This all happened after a particularly dry season in prayer. I was feeling overwhelmed, distracted, and alone. Restlessness crept in and prayer became a daily struggle. The Lord felt far away. But of course, as the lover of my soul, He was never far away. Jesus was so very close. He was in the darkest depths of my heart.
He is in the places that I am afraid to go. The places that I hide from. Places that have grown cold and lonely. Places surrounded by thick stone walls. Places that I would rather pretend do not exist. Yet, my Savior was waiting for me there. Waiting for me to welcome Him, and allow Him to bring warmth. Allow Him to bring beauty. Allow Him to bring love.
For a long time I ran and hid, and He continued to wait with such tenderness. Then into the darkest depths, He brought the light of grace.
“Not as man sees does God see, because he sees the appearance but the Lord looks into the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7). Maybe your heart feels lonely and abandoned, devoid of beauty and light. But the Lord is with you. Welcome Him in. He sees a place to abide and adorn. You are not alone. You are not forgotten. From the depths of your soul, you are loved.
Leana Bowler is a wife and mother of eight little ones. She is a Holy Rosary enthusiast with deep devotions to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Immaculate Heart of Mary. Her love for the message of Divine Mercy led her to become a Marian Missionary of Divine Mercy. She enjoys the miracles of family life, strong coffee, and encountering others on this journey to sainthood. She was a contributing author to And Hay Became Holy and Made New: 52 Devotions for Catholic Women.
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