In the house the disciples again questioned Jesus about this. // Mark 10:10
I remember the evening she confessed to having serious questions about God and prayer. In that moment, I felt helpless and sad. Somehow, our efforts to create a prayerful Catholic home didn't prevent questions and doubts (in hindsight, I should have always expected questions).
As a result, I wrestled with my own self-doubt. In time and through prayer, I settled on one response: Let her ask all the questions. Walk with her on the way to understanding.
Understanding cannot be forced. It is a gift to be used, under the prompting of the Holy Spirit (see Catechism of the Catholic Church § 1266). The entirety of our lives is filled with choices to seek the truth, to relentlessly pursue understanding, and to live according to the truth we find.
As the exchange in today's Gospel reveals, even those closest to Jesus "again questioned Jesus" (Mark 10:10). The disciples didn't receive instant understanding by virtue of being one of the disciples. We know that the prophets and disciples questioned, failed to perfectly love, and suffered. We also know that many men and women persevered anyway, and found the Truth and the One they looked for.
I find comfort in the examples of the holy men and women who sought truth and found Jesus. James exhorts us to "take an example of hardship and patience" (James 5:10-11) from those who have gone before us. There's a good reason for this, sister. We need to know we're not alone, we need to see that questioning is integral to the journey leading to deeper understanding (when done with proper intentions), and we need to be encouraged by the stories of those who are not so different from any of us.
Most of us have bumpy roads towards holiness. This is why we look to those who have gone before, persisted in seeking, and turned to the Lord over and over.
What questions are you wrestling with today? Bring your questions to Jesus, as the disciples did. See which Saint you can ask to pray with you and be a companion in your seeking.
We are not alone. // Gina FenstererClick to tweet
Gina Fensterer is a wife and mother of six children. She is passionate about finding God in the ordinary moments of her vocation. She loves Adoration, praying with Scripture, long morning walks, and fitness. She was a contributing author to And Hay Became Holy and our children's devotional prayer book called Rise Up. Read more by her here.
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