From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. // James 3:10
A childhood friend and I went on a short hike in Southern California on a warm spring day.
We hadn't seen each other in quite some time, and I felt uncomfortable while I was with her because I knew that she was perceiving me as the version of Kiki whom she had been friends with two years before.
Two years prior, I had been steeped in using vulgarity (curse words) in language. Vulgarity to refer to the sacred. Vulgarity to talk about other people or in general conversation. It was incredibly difficult to rewire my brain to speak in a way that reverenced God, people, and my own dignity. So this friend of mine, during our hike, was trying to recount memories in which the old me referred to sex in a vulgar way.
Honestly? The first thought in my mind was, What have I done? It's like something I've 'passed on,' something I encouraged, and it made me so funny to others that that's how they want to remember me.
In that moment I learned to "consider how a small fire can set a huge forest ablaze" (James 3:5). My behavior had impacted someone else and caused a chain reaction. Slowly, God had helped me to see that my mouth holds so much power, and I had to really face my vice of speaking loosely and vulgarly.
I hope that in no way do you feel condemned by me, sister, if you are working through the vice of vulgarity. On the contrary, I invite you to see how during communion our tongue is the throne of God. After I received this epiphany, there was no going back for me, and I have been determined to persist in speaking more purely.
Let that sink in: the throne of God! "With it we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse men who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this need not be so" (James 3:9-10). Let's only have blessings come from our tongues.
Keep striving! I'm right there with you!