Mental health is a vast topic, and it can be especially challenging during the dreary, cold, and sometimes lonely winter season. For those who have experienced mental struggles like anxiety, the winter stands to be, perhaps, the most difficult time of the year. The days are cold and dark, going out is more difficult, and finding the motivation to be active sometimes seems impossible.
Here are seven tips to empower you to have a winter season rooted in mental wellness.
1. Accept that this is a stressful time of year.
Give yourself the courtesy to know that there are real and reasonable stressors added by wintry weather, making travel difficult (especially back and forth to work every day). The decrease in sunlight is a known factor in making mental health stressful due to the lack of vitamin D. Even high-priced heating bills can get you down.
Acceptance is a good starting point to prepare your mind for these and other triggers that are likely to make your anxiety flare up. Being ready for stress, anxiety, and concerns can help you make your way through the challenging times ahead.
2. Make prayer part of your day.
Maintaining a prayer routine is important in the chill of winter. But if we are feeling the winter blues, even prayer may be challenging. One simple way to keep our relationship with the Lord going is through a prayer app, like the one Blessed Is She offers. This gives you opportunities to pray with others throughout the day. When you are out and about, or to and from work, take a route with a Eucharistic Adoration chapel on it, and plan frequent stops to visit our Lord. There is something warm and radiant about being in the Eucharistic Presence of Jesus that will surely bring Light to your soul even on the cloudiest, dreariest winter day.
3. Don’t be a bully . . . to yourself!
Once we accept the reality that winter might bring challenges and anxieties, the next step is to be kind to ourselves, and we do this by not being our own bully.
Every one of us has been told over and over again that we should not be a bully and this is a widely accepted truth. However, we are often our own worst bullies and don't even notice it. Frequently, we say terrible and nasty things to ourselves that we would never say to someone else. I challenge you: The next time you are going through a hard patch or you are feeling anxious and start to have negative self-talk, ask yourself, "Would I say the same thing to a friend?" If not, then stop and give yourself the same kindness and compassion you would give to a friend.
4. Allow yourself to have more than one feeling at a time.
Humans are complex, and it’s normal to feel many simultaneous emotions, such as happiness, sadness, excitement, fear, trepidation, or self-conscious feelings, to name a few. Feel them! Whether it’s one of the scenarios listed above, some unique situation you’re facing, or the unknown that lies ahead, just know that there are countless scenarios where your emotions might seem in conflict—and they probably are—so be prepared that this is coming and allow yourself to have more than one feeling at a time!
5. Give yourself permission to set boundaries.
Boundaries are good and healthy, and preparing boundaries ahead of time is a good approach to mental health. Many Catholics believe that boundaries are unloving or unkind, but boundaries are safeguards against ongoing hurt, trauma, and toxicity.
You have permission to set boundaries, and although they often come with a negative stigma, boundaries can, in fact, actually be the most loving things we can do and help relationships grow to their fullest capacity. Here, try thinking about creating boundaries that maximize the life-giving parts of a relationship and minimize the more challenging parts.
6. Create your net.
Going through the winter alone can be brutal, so take the necessary steps to plan time with your net. A net, which I refer to as a hammock, includes people in your life that you can trust and count on. They could include family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, clergy, or spiritual directors. Also remember that God is right there with you, along with your guardian angel and the Communion of Saints! Two Saints you might be drawn to for help with your mental health are Saint Dymphna and Saint John of God.
After you identify who they are, allow them to wrap you in their care and support just like a hammock wraps and supports you. Maybe it’s a weekly video call with your parents, dinner with neighbors, or a winter adventure with a friend. Spreading out the support over many strings makes your hammock more supportive and stable.
Likewise, it is important to remember that relationships are two-way streets, and our friends and loved ones need us as well. Being a string in someone else's hammock is a great way to heal, and also feel a sense of importance and purpose. During this winter season, consider how you can support others who are struggling too.
7. Know that anxiety is a natural response of the human body.
When you experience anxiety, your body is merely responding to a perceived danger. When that danger is real, your body responds with a life-saving response, frequently called the “fight, flight, or freeze” response. But when your body perceives a danger that isn’t real, your body is responding to what I call the “anxious response,” when you feel anxious about being anxious, which makes you more and more anxious. Spend time acknowledging how your body is responding and determine whether your body’s response to the perceived danger is rational (i.e., a bear coming at you in the woods) or irrational (“Winter is here. It’s colder and darker, and makes me sad. Things will never change and it will be like this forever.”). When the dangers are irrational, don’t allow them to have control over your mental health; instead try to work through them, especially by using these steps.
Winter can be really tough. It can be lonely, dark, isolating, and cold. But it doesn’t have to be. Hopefully utilizing these tips will help you experience the winter blues a little differently this year.
Catherine DiNuzzo is a Licensed Professional Counselor, living in Beloit, Kansas. Catherine travels internationally and all across the US speaking at conferences, training individuals, and running retreats. She operates a private counseling practice as well as SacredHeartMentalWellness.com, an online resource to help people live mentally well. Check out her book, The Catholic Guide Through Anxiety, for a simplified method to understanding anxiety and some of the methods, tools, and strategies for overcoming it.
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