For a few months leading up to my participation in a Theology of the Body retreat, every time I attended Mass, I would be jolted into remembrance of a particular situation from college that caused me great distress.
My heart would race, and I would immediately dissolve into internal pleas of “Oh God, please forgive me! I’m so sorry! Please don’t be angry with me!” I had already confessed the situation and received absolution but with the retreat coming up, old memories were resurfacing. I didn’t know how I could possibly atone for my mistakes, let alone be worthy enough to receive Holy Eucharist.
I knew it was spiritual warfare—especially because the memories and the panic would come during Mass—but that didn’t ease my panic or shake the feeling that I disappointed God and needed to do something to make it all better.
But what can I give to the One Who created everything? Or as the prophet Micah exclaims, “With what shall I come before the LORD, and bow before God most high?” (Micah 6:6)
Scrupulosity, self-unforgiveness, and trying to earn God’s favor are not the ways of the Lord! God is not a distant, aggrieved accountant, taking inventory of our wrongs and demanding repayment with interest.
GOD IS LOVE!
GOD IS MERCY!
GOD IS FOR US!
All He asks of us is to, “do the right and to love goodness, and to walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8). God wants to be in relationship with us, close enough to walk with us.
And in return, humility requires that we recognize the power, might, and majesty of Our Father: the power of His love, the might of His mercy, and the majesty that He embraces us with as His beloved daughters.
What can I give to the One Who created everything? // @chikasworldClick to tweet
If you're struggling with sins already confessed and absolved, talk about it with a trusted priest or spiritual advisor.
Chika Anyanwu is a Catholic evangelist, speaker, and author of My Encounter: How I Met Jesus In Prayer. Her missionary zeal is inspired by a love of Christ and the Church, the lives of the saints, and a desire to see people live their worth. She was a contributing author to Maranatha: The Story of Our Savior. Find out more here.
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