Welcome to our Blessed Chats series! Each month, we will dedicate an entire week of blog posts to a topic that affects many of us. These conversations often come up in our Facebook groups and in our real life friendships. We want to share a variety of perspectives on the topic at hand, so we've asked women to share their stories and how the teachings of the Church have guided and comforted them. In this series, we're talking about college. We'd love for you to join the conversation! It was the night before I was about to move from home and away from my parents, friends, and family. As I laid in bed I had a pit in my stomach. What was I thinking? Sure, the summer had been exciting and full of hope as I anticipated the new adventure of transferring to a school a state away. Yet in the twelve hours before that move was to be made, I could feel doubt and fear rising up within me. I loved my life. I grew up in a loud and joy-filled home with my parents and six siblings. We lived within walking distance of our cousins and were part of a large community of families who lived life together ever since I was a baby. Now here I was about to say goodbye to it all. I was afraid that all I had held on to so tightly would slip right through my fingers. When You're Moving Away from Home for College In my moment of fear, I was forgetting God’s provision. You can’t look forward when you are looking back. I was forgetting that He had opened the doors for me to enter into a new chapter of my life, a part of my story that He desired for me. While slightly nervous, I was determined to embrace this path that I knew the Lord had set me on. So, from one who was very prone to home-sickness, here is what helped me to find community, purpose, and joy when I transferred schools my Junior year of college. Stay in touch with family. Moving away from home doesn’t mean you check out of your family and friends’ lives. I recommend calling regularly, but in moderation. Having a specific day of the week to call home can give you something to look forward to and be a helpful benchmark. The moderation part is key because it can be tempting to call too often when we feel a pang of homesickness. But when it feels challenging, it is really important to invest in the people around you whether this be a friend you’ve just met or housemates. Allow them to bring you comfort. If you only share your heart with your loved ones back home, it will prove extremely difficult to form relationships. Early on, it was hard for me to call my parents and I would get choked up. But maintaining that connection with them outweighed the ache. In time, that ache subsided. Don’t go home for six weeks. This was the advice one of my old friends received from her mom when she moved to a different state for school. Her mom’s point was that if you come home every weekend because you are home-sick or afraid of missing out on something, you are holding yourself back from developing connection and community where you are. When I moved away I chose to embrace this idea, and it was really rewarding. To help distract myself from breaking this commitment, I spent those first six weeks pouring into on-campus activities, learning about groups and clubs to sign up for, and saying yes to coffee, lunch, and dinner invitations. That’s where my next tip comes in. Be brave. Join a Bible study, extracurricular, or intramural sport. My housemate invited me to join the Bible study she was leading on campus. I looked forward to these weekday evenings when my friend and I would walk to the dorm where our study was held to talk Scripture for a couple of hours. It was at one of these Bible studies that I met one of my dearest friends. I participated in the Students for Human Life group that was on campus and got to know my classmates better by spending time with them at our meetings and events. Committing to the same group of people for a consistent period of time is one of the best things you can do to meet people and build friendships. For those of you who are more athletically inclined (not me), intramural sports can also be a great way to meet people. Be gentle with yourself and rest. It was the weekend two or three weeks after having moved and I was exhausted. I called my dad to vent. “All I want to do is stay home and not do anything,” I said to him. I had been pouring myself into so many different events and introducing myself to so many people, but I still felt guilty for wanting to stay home on a weekend. Thankfully, he offered me the wisdom I needed and let me know it was okay and important to take a night off from social activities. That was a turning point for me! My dad’s advice to be gentle with myself helped keep me from getting burned out from over committing and re-energized me for the coming week. WRITE + PRAY We invite you to sit with the Word and unpack it in a uniquely personal way, finding your own story. Discover your story within His. GET WRITE AND PRAY Be intentional with your roommates. When I transferred my Junior year, I moved into a house a few blocks off campus with three girls who I barely knew. Thankfully, each of them were wonderful and warmly welcomed me into their lives, introducing me to their friends and inviting me to join them at the fair, movies, or out to eat. The key to keeping our house running smoothly was our weekly house dinners. Each week we would rotate who was cooking. On the weeks when we skipped a house-dinner, I could feel tensions rising. The space between our shared meals created space for misunderstanding. I would convince myself that one of my roommates was upset with me, even if we hadn’t had any disagreements. Then, when we would all sit down again for dinner, we all caught up like normal and I would realize that my anxious feelings were due to the fact that I hadn’t been intentionally communicating. Make a budget for restaurants and entertainment. Looking back on my college experience, I wish I had been slightly less frugal. That might sound crazy, but I was very focused on making my dollar stretch and paying off student loans as quickly as possible. Financial responsibility is incredibly important and I don’t want to make light of saving, but it is good to set aside at least a small amount of money to have fun, too! There were many evenings where I would decline invitations out to dinner with friends, or forego going to a movie on opening night. Sometimes these decisions needed to be made, and sometimes I needed to make the splurge in order to get to know people better. Create an allowance for a night out, and when money is in a pinch, plan a pizza making party or girls night in. A part-time job can also be a great way to earn a little extra cash for these types of splurges, and be an opportunity to meet people! Find an Adoration chapel. First and foremost, remember that wherever you are, Jesus is. In times of struggle, run to Him and He will meet you. When the world isn’t bringing you comfort, let Him be your saving grace. There were many a night when my peace, security, and joy were found in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. As you prepare for this move, spend a few minutes researching where your closest Adoration chapel is to campus. Maybe there is even one on-site!   This is just one of many stories about college life and discernment. We want to hear YOUR story. Please share in the comments below! And if you want more help with finding your own story, our popular Write + Pray course offers 9 topics, nearly an hour of guided video, and almost 50 Scripture verses and questions for you featuring Managing Editor Nell O'Leary. Find your story today.   [bctt tweet="Blessed Chats: College // Moving Away from Home #BISblog #blessedchats" via="no"] HIS WORD CHANGES LIVES God is speaking to you through His Word. In this personal study, you will learn to hear God's voice by reading slowly and praying deeply. BEGIN THE JOURNEY

Welcome to our Blessed Chats series! Each month, we will dedicate an entire week of blog posts to a topic that affects many of us. These conversations often come up in our Facebook groups and in our real life friendships. We want to share a variety of perspectives on the topic at hand, so we've asked women to share their stories and how the teachings of the Church have guided and comforted them. In this series, we're talking about college. We'd love for you to join the conversation! It does not feel that long ago when I was a young adult woman beginning a new chapter in life on my college campus. I was eager to exercise my newfound independence by moving away from home and into my home-away-from-home for the next four years. I looked forward to selecting interesting courses and meeting new friends. The reality is that time is funny, and even though this does not feel that long ago, it was. Because now my own daughter is a senior in high school and preparing to begin this new chapter in her life. As I reflect upon my own college experience, I write this blog post for you, as your sister in Christ—with a few more years of collected experience and wisdom. Whether you are just beginning your college experience or nearing the end. Whether you are fulfilling a gap year in ministry, service, or the working world. Or whether you have chosen another path, I pray that these words give you confidence and courage to stay strong in your faith no matter where life brings you, during these exciting, unique years of life. Hindsight is 20-20 I intentionally chose a Catholic college because my Faith was important to me. But I quickly discovered that living out the Catholic Faith was not the priority of every student on campus. Even at a supposedly Catholic university, I still had to actively seek out like-minded people who wanted to attend Mass each Sunday and be involved in other faith-enriching activities. Despite having a handful of good friends, I still walked some of my faith journey alone during those years. At one point, I sought the spiritual guidance of a religious sister who lived in my college’s convent, when I needed help discerning how to listen to God’s voice in the midst of so much noise. Overall, I had a pretty good experience staying committed to my Faith during my college years. However, hindsight is always 20-20, isn’t it? And I wish I would have had a more experienced sister in Christ to encourage and challenge me in my faith, during a time when so many other ideologies were vying for my attention. WRITE + PRAY We invite you to sit with the Word and unpack it in a uniquely personal way, finding your own story. Discover your story within His. GET WRITE AND PRAY How to Cultivate Your Faith in the College Years So, here are some concrete tips for you. Ones that worked for me, and ones I wish someone would have shared with me. I hope you find them helpful and encouraging, as you navigate these significant, formative years. Keep Going to Mass Strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. // Matthew 6:33 If you attend a college that offers on-campus Mass, go! If you do not, find the closest (orthodox) parish, and attend Sunday Mass there. The Eucharist is the heart of our Catholic Faith. “It is our duty and salvation,” the primary way we give God our gratitude and praise. The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass centers us and keeps our eyes fixed on Christ. In addition to finding a church where you can attend Mass, find out schedules for Confession and Eucharistic Adoration. Regularly frequent these opportunities for grace. Commit to Personal Prayer But whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. // Matthew 6:6 This season of life is full of change. Your location and surroundings change. Your schedule changes. Your friends and acquaintances change, too. Amidst all of this transition, it is so important to maintain a consistent prayer routine. Make prayer a priority and a habit. Figure out where and when you can pray each morning or evening. Entrust your whole life to the Lord. Talk with Him about the highs and lows of college life. Seek His guidance and direction. Go to Eucharistic Adoration when you can. Read Sacred Scripture. Pray the Rosary. Seek Out Like-Minded Friends For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them. // Matthew 18:20 Whether you attend a Catholic or secular university, seek out other Catholic young adults. Most colleges across the United States have some type of Catholic outreach program that offers Bible studies, prayer meetings, and other discipleship opportunities: Newman Center Saint Paul’s Outreach FOCUS Even if your Catholic friendship circle starts small, with one other sister in Christ, she will make all the difference in your life (and vice versa). And eventually, you will encounter more Catholic friends. Connect Online For though I am absent in body, yet I am with you in spirit, and I rejoice to see your morale and the firmness of your faith in Christ. // Colossians 2:5 Living in a digital age, there are a plethora of ways to keep in touch with sisters in Christ across the miles. Offer prayer support to friends back home via a group chat. Follow uplifting Catholic accounts on social media. Join a Blessed is She group to pursue authentic Catholic friendships. Listen to Catholic podcasts to receive regular doses of solid Catholic teaching. Unite Your Loneliness to Christ’s Realization of our oneness in Christ is the only cure for human loneliness. // Caryll Houselander I have to be honest with you, dear sister. You may experience periods of loneliness because of your Faith during these college-age years. While others are at parties or giving into a variety of temptations, you may be the only one in the dorm on any given night. You may have to say no to the crowd, in order to say yes to Christ. When this happens, unite your loneliness with Christ’s loneliness, when the crowd turned against Him. Trust that He, and countless Saints who have gone before us, understand this sacrifice and can help you through it. Because it is worth every lonely moment to stay true to yourself, to your relationship with the Lord, and to your Catholic values. Your loneliness will be temporary, and you will be so glad you persevered in the end. Be Confident in Your Faith Keep alert, stand firm in your faith, be courageous, be strong. // 1 Corinthians 16:13 As you embark (or continue) on your journey, my dear sister in Christ, please be assured of my prayers for you. As I think of my own daughter, as she prepares to graduate and begin a year of ministry, I will think of you, too, in whatever plans God has for you.   This is just one of many stories about college life and discernment. We want to hear YOUR story. Please share in the comments below! And if you want more help with finding your own story, our popular Write + Pray course offers 9 topics, nearly an hour of guided video, and almost 50 Scripture verses and questions for you featuring Managing Editor Nell O'Leary. Find your story today.   [bctt tweet="Blessed Chats: College // Cultivating Your Faith on Campus #BISblog #blessedchats" via="no"] HIS WORD CHANGES LIVES God is speaking to you through His Word. In this personal study, you will learn to hear God's voice by reading slowly and praying deeply. BEGIN THE JOURNEY

Welcome to our Blessed Chats series! Each month, we will dedicate an entire week of blog posts to a topic that affects many of us. These conversations often come up in our Facebook groups and in our real life friendships. We want to share a variety of perspectives on the topic at hand, so we've asked women to share their stories and how the teachings of the Church have guided and comforted them. In this series, we're talking about college. We'd love for you to join the conversation! The Saving Graces, written by Patricia Gaffney, is a story of four girlfriends who for a decade shared deep affection that helped them deal with the ebb and flow of life, uniting them as years went by. Their story profoundly impacted the way I viewed friendship. I was deeply enthused by their depth, loyalty, vulnerability and how quickly they chose to forgive. I have often wondered why such stories leave indelible marks on our soul . What is it about such relationships that invoke in us a deep desire for belonging? Why was I drawn to it? Being The Beloved In 2019, following my talk on relationships at a youth conference, a young girl came to me saying “I don’t have any friends, what is wrong with me?” Her question brought a myriad of memories without delay. During college, I had superficial relationships and very few that resembled "friendships." I floated between different groups across campuses, trying to fit in but was shattered many times by girls who elevated themselves by tearing others down. On the other hand, my broken home, coupled with my atheistic lifestyle, prevented me from seeing myself as a "gift." It left a deep void within me. I constantly tried to fill this emptiness with the comfort of shallow friendships, those who knew me only by my appearance, not my heart. I was the queen of comparison, constantly seeking validation, settling for mediocrity. I set unrealistic—if not idolatrous—expectations on friends, expecting them to comfort, provide and love the way I wanted. The Healing of Christ When I encountered Christ in 2004, my view on friendship still needed work. Having lived my whole life with a performance mentality, I entered ministry life as well, approaching people like programs, finding worth in “doing” rather than being. I experienced hurt and heartache, many from women, leaving me wondering if authentic female friendships were even a reality in the Church. My healing journey with Christ has taught me that I cannot give from an empty well. Hurting people hurt other people. I need to first receive my deepest identity as a beloved of the Father. The more I abide in His friendship, the more I am able to see friendship as an overflow of His love. The more I see myself as the beloved, the more I am able to embrace people as Christ does, without destructive expectations. How fitting that in the grand story of salvation, then, wounds are not erased, they become tools that God uses to tell His story, bringing Hope. As Christ continues to heal my heart, I’m learning to ask: How can I love like Him? How can I be that true loving friend? Sustaining Digital Friendships Life Coach Jim Roan says, "Show me five people you hang out with the most and I'll tell you where you'll end up." We don’t just choose friends; we also adopt their lifestyle and worldview. We become who we choose. As a Youth Mentor, I am aware of the challenge to sustain friendships in our digital age. With so much focus on connection and so little on communion, young people tend to confuse strangers with friends—people who have access to their feed, but don’t have access to the deepest parts of their story. In Hebrew the word for friend is very closely related to the word “secrets” because a friend is someone we can trust not just with information, but with our life. But think about how easy it is today to violate trust. It takes a second to text or tweet something confidential but a lifetime to repair the damage. How do we sustain lifelong relationships as pilgrims on the digital highway? In his encyclical Fratelli Tutti, Pope Francis writes, “Life is stronger than death when built on true relationships and bonds of fidelity.” It is no secret that we have been wounded by female friendships. But it is for this very reason that the sisterhood needs the authenticity of our witness to create a culture of encounter where trust and truth can foster faith, friendship and commitment in relationships. WRITE + PRAY We invite you to sit with the Word and unpack it in a uniquely personal way, finding your own story. Discover your story within His. GET WRITE AND PRAY Love Beyond Borders Friendship in its purest form is love. But what do we mean by love? I love chocolate, I love my sister, and God loves me. Are those the same kind of loves? A friendship which requires moving beyond the ‘self’, toward others is perhaps the most overlooked opportunity in our busy world. We need encounters of love, discovering beyond what we can see, being open to dialogue and being better listeners. In Mary’s life, we see how God’s love not only permeated her innermost being; it also propelled her forward for the good of another. Following the Annunciation, Mary didn’t run first to the leaders or her parents or even the man she was promised to marry. Despite the cost, she went in haste to Elizabeth (Luke 1:39), to bring affirmation, to testify and to burst forth into song, together. This is the beauty of a soul filled with love; this is sisterhood—going beyond oneself, building bridges, emerging stronger. Mary’s friendship is a timely reminder for our modern friendships. She invites us to challenge the cultural status quo that says, "What can I get out of this," to arrive at, "how can I be a friend to you?" I have begged God to bring holy women into my life and after much heartbreak I am so grateful for my inner circle today, women who not only call me higher, but continually lead me to Christ’s Sacred Heart. Their willingness to call me out in truth is such a tremendous gift. It is life-giving, transforming and therapy to my soul. We are tempted for quick wins, but deep friendships take time, they are born through shared adversity, deepened through forgiveness and consistent vulnerability. We need connections that bleed love. Jesus, Friend Forever Sister, if you are struggling in your friendships, compromising under pressure, or grieving the losses of friends gone, I want to encourage you. God sees your heart and your ache for authentic sisterhood. You are not alone. The manger and eventually the Cross are the supreme reminders of God's involvement, intimacy, and saving graces on our journey. Remember, Jesus had three close friends who professed to love Him all the way, but at the most crucial moments of His life, they abandoned Him. Yet, He called them friends (John 15:15). He gave them access to His heart and offered them His trust. Take heart, knowing that in our moments of loneliness, when we turn to cry out in abandonment, we find ourselves face to face with a tortured, bloody man on a cross, in whose death our friendships are redefined and redeemed. Even in the deepest moment of abandonment, we meet the one who is called "God with Us" Ask the Lord for Good Friends in College This is the work of the Holy Spirit, conforming us to the One who is Love and setting ablaze our hearts to love like He does. His fire runs deep, purging our selfishness, helping us forgive, burning away fears and breaking down filters that prevent us from being the friend we’ve always wanted. Pray for good friends. And consider how you can be a good friend today.   This is just one of many stories about college life and discernment. We want to hear YOUR story. Please share in the comments below! And if you want more help with finding your own story, our popular Write + Pray course offers 9 topics, nearly an hour of guided video, and almost 50 Scripture verses and questions for you featuring Managing Editor Nell O'Leary. Find your story today.   [bctt tweet="Blessed Chats: College // Authentic Female Friendships #BISblog #blessedchats //" via="no"]

Welcome to our Blessed Chats series! Each month, we will dedicate an entire week of blog posts to a topic that affects many of us. These conversations often come up in our Facebook groups and in our real life friendships. We want to share a variety of perspectives on the topic at hand, so we've asked women to share their stories and how the teachings of the Church have guided and comforted them. In this series, we're talking about college. We'd love for you to join the conversation! “You know, you don’t have to go to college right away. You can always take a gap year.” I remember my high school theology teacher saying this to me after I returned home from my final college visit, dejected and scared. I had everything planned out. I would go to a good Catholic university, get a degree in history or law, get a Masters and hopefully get my Mrs degree while I was at it. Instead, I was overwhelmingly disappointed and angry that I toured my dream school and hated it. It was just a few months until graduation and all of my best laid plans were not panning out. I did not know what to do. As a former type-A planner, this was not a fun experience. All of a sudden, everything had to be reevaluated. Should I just go to school anyways and suck it up? What do I want to be when I grow up? Will this disappoint my parents? How am I going to provide for myself? What Do I Do Next? As I cried to my teacher about how nervous I was, she ever so gently suggested this idea of taking some time off of school to figure out what the Lord wanted me to do with my life. My heart peaked at that idea but I immediately shrugged it off because there was no way I could do something so uncertain, countercultural, and risky. As all of these questions were circulating in my brain, I grasped at so many concrete answers in an attempt to find some peace. It did not come. So, for the first time in my life and pretty reluctantly, I prayed very honestly and simply with the Lord. All I asked is that His plan would become clear. Not my plan, but His plan. I began to trust Him with my deepest desires, dreams, and hopes because I had nothing to lose. Not long after, doors began to open much faster than I expected. It was one just “yes” at a time and one day at a time. With those individual fiats came amazing jobs, incomes, mentors, and so much more. I had nothing planned out. It was all total surrender and radical trust in the promises of the Lord. Non-Traditional Higher Education Four years post high school graduation, I am a full-time photographer and working for Blessed is She. I still do not have an undergraduate degree. My life has been more exciting, beautiful, and stable than I could have ever accomplished of my own accord. I have no idea what is coming next or what is going to happen in regards to my education, career, vocation, finances, and so on because He is taking care of every detail. He has shown me time and time again that He is faithful to the promises He has made each of us (see Jeremiah 29:11). It wasn’t a Strengths Finder quiz or formula that helped me be successful without a college degree. It was simply walking through the doors that Jesus opened for me. Now, I am free to do His will. I am detached from my plans. And that is freedom, my friend. WRITE + PRAY We invite you to sit with the Word and unpack it in a uniquely personal way, finding your own story. Discover your story within His. GET WRITE AND PRAY Don't Be Afraid to Do Something Different Breaking away from societal norms and doing life non-traditionally can bring unique challenges and you most likely will face opposition from others, including close friends and family. This can be painful and discouraging. Remember that it can be hard for others to understand your discernment. It can be hard for others to not do things “in order” or “the right way.” Most people are coming from a place of love when they question your non-traditional ways, but trust your discernment. Talk to trusted people such as friends, priests, or spiritual directors. Most of all, really talk to the Lord about it. He is bigger than all of the opposition you may face. You are unique and unrepeatable and the plan for your life is just the same. Surrendering control and your plan is incredibly hard and humbling. We want to know everything and we want to do it ourselves because we think we know what is best. But the picture He wants to paint with your life is a masterpiece. Remember that He is starting with a blank canvas, so it can be hard to see at first what exactly He is painting. But slowly over time, you will see what He is creating. What He is creating is good and it is much more magnificent than you could ever imagine. We can trust Him with it. We just have to allow Him to use us as the instruments for His masterpiece. Really Pray About It If you too are feeling this desire in your heart to take a bit more non traditional route after high school or college, pray about it. If He opens doors, walk through them. Chances are, the places you will go are better than you dreamed.   This is just one of many stories about college life and discernment. We want to hear YOUR story. Please share in the comments below! And if you want more help with finding your own story, our popular Write + Pray course offers 9 topics, nearly an hour of guided video, and almost 50 Scripture verses and questions for you featuring Managing Editor Nell O'Leary. Find your story today. LITURGICAL PLANNERS Our Liturgical Planners are based on the Litany of Humility. Enter into prayer every day alongside this beautiful Litany. Order your days in His peace. GET YOUR PLANNER

Welcome to our Blessed Chats series! Each month, we will dedicate an entire week of blog posts to a topic that affects many of us. These conversations often come up in our Facebook groups and in our real life friendships. We want to share a variety of perspectives on the topic at hand, so we've asked women to share their stories and how the teachings of the Church have guided and comforted them. In this series, we're talking about college. We'd love for you to join the conversation! Here is my full disclosure: I attended three different universities in my five years of undergraduate education. While that may make it sound as though I’m very unskilled at college discernment, I prefer to look at my experience through a more positive lens. It gave me more practice than most with discerning a school! If you are hoping for a perfect formula to tell you what to do if you’re feeling stuck or undecided, you will not find that here. What you will find, however, are the tips I gathered through my unique college journey, as well as some wisdom I’ve gained about discernment in the decade-plus since then. Where to go to college is a big decision; there is no doubt about that. In many cases, it may be the first major life decision that you have made on your own, or that you have the final say about. That responsibility may feel invigorating, or it may feel paralyzing. No matter which side of the spectrum you fall on, here is my greatest encouragement to you, sister: God can work in your life and use you for His purpose at any college. There may be a “best” option, but there is no “wrong” option. Narrowing Down Your Choices This video by Father Mike Schmitz contains one of my favorite teachings on discernment. In it, Father Mike shares how to discern a path by considering the following: is this a good door, is this an open door, is this a wise door, and finally, is this a door that I want? When it comes to choosing a college to attend, the last three questions tend to be the most relevant. An “open” door may refer to a variety of factors. Does a school have the major you want to pursue? Could you afford to attend? And, of course, when it comes time to actually decide on a school, were you accepted? If the answer to the last question is no, it may not mean you are never supposed to go there, but it does mean that the door is closed to you for now. Identifying a “wise” door is more challenging. Pray for the gift of wisdom—to know yourself, to recall the struggles or temptations you’ve faced throughout your high school career, and to clearly see the areas in which you have thrived. With that knowledge, try to assess each school on your list. For example, if partying has been a source of temptation or sin over the past four years, it may be wise to steer clear of schools with a wild reputation. If you are very close to your family and anxious about being too far from home, consider sticking to a school within a few hours’ driving distance, even if all of your friends are applying across the country. You have grown so much over the past four years. Now is the time to take what you have learned, what you have experienced, and what God has taught you, and use that wisdom to guide this decision. When He Makes His Will Clear I spent most of high school perusing liberal arts colleges with strong writing programs up and down the East Coast. It wasn’t until the summer before my senior year that God made it very clear, very quickly that He wanted me at a small Catholic university—the same one I had told myself I would never consider. I honestly had not even prayed about it before that day. Quite literally, I woke up one morning, felt deep in my heart that I had to go there, and submitted my application within the week. I was accepted before my first day of my senior year. Done and done (or so I thought). I wish it was this easy for every student. In fact, I wish it was this easy with more of the decisions I’ve had to make in my life since then. Looking back, I knew it was God’s prompting because it was the total opposite of my own plan, and yet, I felt complete clarity, peace, and conviction about it. The door was good, open, and wise, and as I prayed about the school, my desire to go there grew exponentially. WRITE + PRAY We invite you to sit with the Word and unpack it in a uniquely personal way, finding your own story. Discover your story within His. GET WRITE AND PRAY The Grace of Seasons If you are struggling with this decision, I would love to offer you this lesson from my experience. Once you choose a school, you are not stuck there. I never imagined, when I set foot on campus for the first time as a freshman, that this wouldn’t be the same campus I would leave in a cap and gown, diploma in hand. God had made it so clear that I was supposed to be there! Why would I ever need to leave? As it turns out, God was calling me to that school for a season and a purpose. But then, He wanted me elsewhere. On your first day of college, you have no idea how the next four-plus years will play out. You may end up changing or refining your field of study and need to go somewhere else to pursue that (the case for me). You may realize you want or need things from a school that you hadn’t considered before. You may find yourself convicted about being closer to home or to your best friends....or further away from them so that you can forge your own path in a new way. If any of these situations is the case, it does not mean that the time you spent at the first school you chose was a waste. Perhaps you’ll meet a lifelong friend, your future spouse, or a professor who will change your life (again, all the case for me!). You may create sweet memories, or be drawn closer to the Lord if the season turns out to be a painful one. No matter what happens, He uses us wherever we are. He is present to us wherever we are. Where Do You Want to Go? Between my sophomore and junior years, I transferred from the small Catholic school to a large public university in the next state over. I had discovered a passion for magazine journalism and was eager to immerse myself in a nonfiction writing curriculum and as many internships as I could get my hands on. And although both of those aspects of school #2 were wonderful, there was something missing. Community. I went from living in a dorm surrounded by household sisters to living a public bus ride away from campus in a sketchy little apartment that I had never seen before my move-in day. My packed class and internship schedule quickly filled my calendar, leaving little space for finding, let alone making, friends. I joined clubs, went to church, and talked to people after class, but six months in, I still hadn’t found my place. This wasn’t what I wanted from my college experience. Here is where Father Mike’s fourth question about discernment came into play for me. “Is this a door that I want?” No matter how many check marks in the “pros” column this school had, I was unhappy there. Through many prayers, tears, and some embarassment, I decided to transfer again, this time to one of my reach schools. Looking back, I now see the beautiful purpose that God had for me at school #2. He has redeemed so much of that experience since then and I am grateful for what He did in my life during that challenging year. He had not made a mistake by prompting me there, and I did not make a mistake by going. But what I wanted at the time mattered too. School #3, my beloved alma mater, is where I received my magazine journalism degree, where I joined a Catholic sorority and lived with three sweet friends, where I completed dream-come-true internships, and where I made so many wonderful memories. It was worth the journey, even with as many twists and turns as it had. Stay Open Sisters headed to college, you are so dear to Our Lord! He cares so much about this next season of your life. No matter which school you choose, stay close to Him in prayer and the Sacraments. Stay open to His promptings, even (especially) if they look different from your plans. He is with you wherever you go (Joshua 1:9)!   This is just one of many stories about college life and discernment. We want to hear YOUR story. Please share in the comments below! And if you want more help with finding your own story, our popular Write + Pray course offers 9 topics, nearly an hour of guided video, and almost 50 Scripture verses and questions for you featuring Managing Editor Nell O'Leary. Find your story today.   [bctt tweet="Blessed Chats: College // School Discernment #BISblog #blessedchats //" via="no"]

Welcome to our Blessed Chats series! Each month, we will dedicate an entire week of blog posts to a topic that affects many of us. These conversations often come up in our Facebook groups and in our real life friendships. We want to share a variety of perspectives on the topic at hand, so we've asked women to share their stories and how the teachings of the Church have guided and comforted them. In this series, we're talking about college. We'd love for you to join the conversation! Attending college was never a question for me; however, I needed to find a way to pay for it. My parents didn’t have the opportunity to attend a university or college, so it was something they always desired for me and my siblings. They believed that having a higher education meant more doors would be open for us. They knew that education was a path to success—not necessarily the kind that means earning thousands of dollars overnight, but the kind that enables you to stretch yourself in ways you never have before and transfer those skills wherever you go. Staying Within My Means I explored options outside my home state but it wasn’t feasible for me to leave. I didn’t generate enough income to pay for an apartment, bills, or furnishings, and I didn’t feel like I needed to leave home to have the university experience I hoped to have. Being realistic with myself was hard. I had several universities that I dreamed about attending. I could envision myself reading under a tree that was hundreds of years old and having access to a library that was used by the greatest minds in the country. Although my university didn’t have the academic reputation of USC, Notre Dame, or Boston College, it was what I could afford and I had to work with that. I knew if I put forth the effort I could make my experience just as good as what I envisioned at the universities I dreamed about. Don’t owe anyone after you’ve earned your diploma. The best advice my sister gave me was to graduate from undergrad without any debt, if it was possible. There is so much freedom in knowing when you invest in something as important as school that you aren’t tied to it financially anymore once you are done. I may have traded my dream university experience for one that was free from debt, but in hindsight, I don’t regret that decision at all. Do you really want it? Consider whether attending college is something you’re doing to meet your own goals or to avoid disappointing parents or family members who would like you to continue a legacy streak at a certain school. Ultimately, no one will be burning the midnight oil for you when it's time to put the work into a ten page research paper that includes a Powerpoint (and don’t forget the bibliography page)! It will be your hard work and effort alone that gets you through your classes successfully. Committing to something as financially burdensome as college because someone else is encouraging you to do so may lead to financial hardship and even resentment toward the vocation you are pursuing. WRITE + PRAY We invite you to sit with the Word and unpack it in a uniquely personal way, finding your own story. Discover your story within His. GET WRITE AND PRAY Save your money and live with your parents or family. For many, college is a rite of passage in which you leave home and explore the world on your own. However, don’t let outside pressure discourage you from living with your parents while you attend school. Living on your own is a huge financial commitment and only you can decide whether it is worth getting into debt. The bills for rent or on-campus living will be addressed only to you and not to those who may be judging you or are being critical because you chose to live at home. Where you choose to live is not an indicator of the kind of adult you are or a measure of success. Living with my parents saved me a substantial amount of money. I was able to save most of my money from nannying during high school and into college. I always filled out my FAFSA and was granted work study jobs on campus, which I thoroughly enjoyed because it meant that I would make a little money while catching up on my homework. It was not easy to see everything I saved go so quickly toward books and parking passes, but this is what I wanted and the expense was worth it. Don’t be afraid to wait until you can afford to attend. It’s okay to have the desire to go to school but to wait and save money until it is financially responsible to go. There is no formula that says you can only attend a college at a certain time in your life. Don’t let the cost of school deter you from pursuing a degree if that is what you desire. There are many different ways of pursuing higher education including scholarships. Although it may be time-consuming to apply for scholarships, they may mean the difference between being able to attend school or dismissing the opportunity to receive financial assistance. I didn’t want my college years to leave me drowning in debt. I maintained the same mentality with my masters program and even applied the same strategy when the time came to plan my wedding. Ask the Holy Spirit If you’re struggling with a particular decision, bring it to prayer and ask the Holy Spirit to help guide your discernment. Consider all your options and determine what is immediately feasible and what may take longer to plan. Financial discernment can be challenging, but with practice, it can be more natural.   This is just one of many stories about college life and discernment. We want to hear YOUR story. Please share in the comments below! And if you want more help with finding your own story, our popular Write + Pray course offers 9 topics, nearly an hour of guided video, and almost 50 Scripture verses and questions for you featuring Managing Editor Nell O'Leary. Find your story today.   [bctt tweet="Blessed Chats: College // Financial Discernment #BISblog #blessedchats //" via="no"]

Christ suffered for sins once, the righteous for the sake of the unrighteous, that he might lead you to God. // 1 Peter 3:18 Love this print from Jazmin De Guzman from today's readings. Let His word dwell in us richly, sisters. Remember, Members, you get this for free! Log in and download! Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper

I first shared my story on Sunday, May 20, 2018: the Feast of Pentecost. That moment came after God sent a number of holy people into my life to help me find the courage and words to not only tell my story, but to work through the psychological, emotional, and spiritual pieces of it. My hope is that God will use me and my story as an instrument to heal others from their deep wounds. Just five days before I opened up about my story, I wrote this note in adoration: “I knew I needed to stop at adoration today, and as I sat down to spend time with our Lord and grabbed the diary of St. Faustina as I often like to do while in the chapel this is where the Lord took me: Page 179. Jesus says to St. Faustina, ‘My chosen one, I will give you even greater graces that you may be the witness of my infinite mercy.’ I took it as a special consolation as if Jesus was telling me that even though this would be hard for me to do, the graces that would come from me sharing my story would be more than worth it.” That hour gave me complete peace, knowing that God would provide for all that I needed to go through with everything on Pentecost. I also prayed for all the victims of sexual abuse everywhere and that God would use my story to heal others the way he has me. The Trauma and the Lies I’m sure you’ve heard that there's no healing without forgiveness, and I am living proof of that. What is forgiveness if not Divine Mercy? We mirror God’s mercy to us when we bestow mercy on those who have hurt us. I grew up in a big family with seven brothers, three sisters, and two loving parents in Brazil. My childhood was just like any other until the age of eight when someone who worked for my dad’s business took advantage of me by molesting and raping me. As you can imagine, this was a devastating experience. So from the tender age of eight, I started believing in the lies that the evil one instilled in me through this trauma. Lying is Satan’s primary weapon against God’s children. He uses this tactic to separate us from our heavenly Father. And he was having a field day with me. First lie: It must have been my fault. // For crying out loud, I was right years old. How could that have been my fault? Second lie: I should be forever ashamed. // This one probably hurt me the most because shame is what kept me from talking about what happened and finding the help that I so desperately needed. Third lie: I’ll never find happiness. // This lie made me believe that God didn’t really love me since He allowed this to happen to me. Witnesses to Forgiveness I believed in those lies so much that, in my early 20s, I realized I was sabotaging my own happiness by being drawn to people that would hurt me. I was in a bad and dark place then and was crying out to God for help. And in my cry for help, he led me to the Holocaust. I had this thrist and desire to understand human suffering better and found myself reading everything I could get my hands on about the terrible evils of the Holocaust. Looking back now, I see God was leading me on my own journey to freedom through forgiveness, even then. After I read and watched everything I thought I could stand about the Holocaust, God started leading me towards the stories from the survivors. That’s when I realized that a common theme among them was forgiveness. The ones who were able to go on and live with purpose, joy and, most importantly, love were the ones who understood that they needed to forgive all the people responsible for the unspeakable evil done to them, their families, and their countries. And then something happened that changed my life forever. In the Face of Unspeakable Evil and Heartbreak My mom called from Brazil to tell some devastating news. My aunt Ilsa, had just lost her only daughter, her daughter’s husband, and their 5-year old son, who were all killed by a drunk driver as they were walking home one evening. A whole family gone in an instant. I was devastated. My cousin Claudenice and I were very close growing up, and I struggled to understand why God would allow such terrible things to happen to good people. After hanging up with my mom, I called my aunt who had just lost her family, and after lots of tears, I asked her how she felt about the man who was responsible for killing not one but three of her family members. Her response was so immediate and shocking that I had to ask a second time. “I have forgiven him already, my Faith demands it.” My aunt is a devout Catholic. I had never heard anyone put it that way before, and immediately two things came to my mind: Oh God, how I wish I could have that kind of faith. If my aunt could forgive the man that just devastated her family, there must be a way for me to forgive the man who did those terrible things to me when I was just a little girl. The Chain of Unforgiveness One of the heaviest chains we tend to carry around with us is unforgiveness. We all have been wronged, and some of us have been deeply hurt by other people. Unforgiveness becomes a poison to yourself, much like a cancer to the soul. We need to constantly ask God for the graces necessary to forgive one another if we are to attain peace in our hearts.We have to realize that forgiveness is a choice and a process. It all starts with the desire to forgive. The more we grow as children of God, we must realize that we need to pray everyday for the courage to be open to forgive and to ask for forgiveness when we have wronged someone. All Things for Good Romans 8:28 says that, “We know that all things work for good for those who love God.” Looking back now and knowing how God is and just how much He loves each and everyone of us, I realized that He used a horrible situation and this family tragedy to speak directly to my heart of the need to forgive my abuser. In His goodness, He always uses terrible situations and events for the good of somebody, and in this case that somebody was me. From that day on, I made a conscious decision to forgive my abuser and move on from victim to survivor with a purpose. And as I did that, I began to experience more peace, and most importantly, I was ready to get close to God. I trusted Him more, I looked for Him more, and I was curious to see what He meant when, so many times through my darkest nights, I heard Him say to me: “If you only knew the wonderful plans I have for you. “ I began to dream about God’s plans for me and asked myself: What do those plans look like? Is He going to bring me a good man for a husband? Am I ever going to be truly healed from this? Is he going to bless me with children? In the years that followed I would have the answers to all these questions. When I made that conscious decision to forgive, I was able to start believing and receiving all God’s blessings, and one of them is my wonderful husband, David! God knew my wounds, and He was extremely good to me by giving me someone like David. David patiently loved me through my brokenness, even in the first years of marriage when I was still trying to sabotage my own happiness by believing in those lies Satan had been telling me since childhood. And then God showed His goodness and mercy to me again by blessing us with three beautiful and kind children whom I adore. Only when we forgive can we begin to hope for a future full of God’s blessings. Forgiveness helps us to get unstuck from the chains that prevent us from living life to its fullness and claiming what’s rightfully ours, which is freedom through Christ. Deeper Healing Even after all of God’s blessings in David and our children, He had more healing in store for me. Just before Lent 2017, I approached my pastor for help. He and another priest walked me through one of the most painful healing experiences I ever had. They used a method similar to what it’s found in the book Unbound by Neal Lozano. As a teacher of deliverance, Neal shows how to find and close those doors that may have been open to evil influences. In my case, that door was my childhood trauma, and consequently, Satan’s underhanded strategies. Had I known how hard that process was going to be, I probably would have said, “No thanks.” But again, Our Lord with His abundant mercies and the Blessed Mother carried me through those excruciating days to bring me to where I am today. Sharing Your Story Just when I thought my healing process was finished and everything was behind me, Go whispered to me in my quiet prayer time that now that I was truly healed and found a place of freedom, He wanted me to share my store to glorify Him and to bring healing to others. I hope that my story inspires you to let God heal you also! Jesus’ fountain of mercy is endless! He wants to free each of us from all the lies that keeps us from being the best version of ourselves and receiving all the blessings He has already planned for us since before we were born. I know that not everyone who has been abused will be called to witness to others, but I do hope that every victim of any type of abuse will find the courage and strength to share their story with their loved ones, their priest, or a trusted friend. The evil one loves everything that’s in the dark because he knows he can manipulate us into believing that God doesn’t love us, and by doing that, he can cause great havoc in our lives. On the contrary, our good Lord wants us to bring those dark, hurting places of our hearts to Him so He can show us just how much He loves us by healing us. As we read in 1Thessalonians 5:5: For all of you are children of the light and children of the day. We are not of night and darkness. I lived in the darkness for so long, and now there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to help others come out of their dark place.   I share my full story in Freedom Through Christ: A Memoir of Healing in the Aftermath of Sexual Abuse. In July 2020, I felt God was calling me to take my healing to a new level. I was being called to establish a home for young women who need healing and restoration following a traumatic event in their lives. Understanding their journey to healing, I have a deep desire to share this gift in a society where human trafficking and physical and sexual abuse are prevalent in astounding rates. Our mission, Healed and Restored, will be a premier care home in the Charlotte, NC area for women suffering from traumatic experiences. We will serve young women ages 13-30 free of charge from across the country. Through programs rooted in mind, body, spirit, and soul care, women will be transformed and experience God’s tremendous healing power and embrace their identity as beloved daughters of the Father. Holistic programs grounded in our beautiful Catholic Faith will include counseling, spiritual exercises, movement therapy, as well a multitude of outdoor experiences. If you would like to know more about this glorious program or if you desire to join this sisterhood of women serving God by serving other women, you can learn more here. In closing, let me ask you a series of questions: Who do you need to forgive? Do you truly desire God’s healing and freedom through Christ? Do you wish to break free from all those chains that have kept you a prisoner? Do you believe that God wants nothing more than to be your healer and comforter? Will you allow Him? Are you ready to start saying yes to the Lord, trusting that He will provide for all that you need? Are you ready to start believing that broken people like you and I are exactly the people He wants to use to accomplish His will and heal others? Ask yourself these questions over the next few days. The answers might just change your life.   [bctt tweet="Healed and Restored #BISblog //" via="no"]   Elza Spaedy is a sexual abuse survivor with a lifechanging story to share. Since becoming Unbound in 2017, Elza has been on fire for the Lord, ready to spread the good news of her incredible healing with other victims. She is the loving wife of David, and a devoted mother to their three beautiful children Bella, Bree, and Tristan. In addition to being an author and public speaker, Elza works as a realtor in Huntersville, North Carolina. She spends her free time with her family volunteering for many different ministries at Saint Mark Catholic Church. Her mission from the Holy Spirit is to share her powerful testimony of hope and healing with others who are still hurting.   This post contains affiliate links. Thanks so much for supporting the ministry of Blessed is She!

I love this time of year. Despite the gray days and cold weather, the first few months of each year always have me a little giddy with quiet expectation. It may be weird to say, but it is entirely because I know something good is coming. At some point during these months, someone that I know and love—even if it’s a long-lost friend I only keep in contact with through social media—will announce the news that they’re expecting a baby. I never know who it will be mind you (that’s the surprise), but I am certain the announcements will come. Yearly birthing trends have told me so. From year to year, September is consistently the month with the highest number of births, followed closely by August and July. I hypothesize that the combination of the cold weather and the excitement of the holidays have a lot to do with this occurrence. Keeping this in mind, I know there are currently many in their first trimester of pregnancy. It's a joyful, but also vulnerable time! A litany of Saints who were also mothers might be exactly the support these expectant mothers need. Litany of Saints for Expectant Mothers There are many holy men who are associated with pregnancy and childbirth within our Catholic Faith. Saint Gerard is often referred to as “the mothers’ saint,” Saint Raymond Nonnatus is sometimes called upon by those undergoing emergency caesarian sections, and Saint Erasmus apparently experienced abdominal pain similar to labor. All of these men are certainly worthy intercessors to call upon. However, I decided not to include them in this litany simply because sometimes you just want the empathy and support of someone who has gone through the same experience as you. No offense to these manly Saints, but none of them actually went through the process of giving birth. However, these saintly ladies below know exactly what it is like to become a mother and raise children. Thus, I am sure they would be willing to fly to the side of any spiritual sister in need. Our Lady of Childbirth A beloved sculpture of Our Lady holding an infant stands in the Basilica of Sant'Agostino in Rome. It is surrounded by and adorned with papers, cards, flowers and other gifts, all from parents who are seeking the intercession of the Blessed Virgin in regards to their unborn children. Due to this tradition, the sculpture has become known as Our Lady of Childbirth. Thus, expectant mothers have title of Mary to call upon as they enter into the delivery room! Our Lady of Guadalupe This teal and gold adorned Mother appeared to Juan Diego, not only dressed as an Aztec princess, but also as an expectant mother. The sash around her waist is an indication of an infant growing in her womb—an indication of the imminent “birth” of Jesus in the hearts of the Aztec descendants who quickly adhered themselves to the Catholic Faith because of this apparition. It is because of her pregnancy that Our Lady of Guadalupe is known as the patroness of the unborn. Our Lady of the Milk and Happy Delivery It was Spanish settlers in Florida who began a devotion to Our Lady of La Leche, an image of Mary nursing the infant Jesus. In the early 1600s, a shrine was erected in her honor in St. Augustine—the first Marian shrine in the United States! It remains a spot of pilgrimage for all people, but especially mothers looking for love from their heavenly Queen. Saints Perpetua & Felicity Residents of North Africa in the third century, Perpetua and Felicity were imprisoned and sentenced to die for their Christian Faith. Perpetua was a twenty-two year old Roman noblewoman with an infant son. Felicity, her servant, was eight months pregnant at the time and was thrilled to give birth before her execution and have her daughter adopted by another Christian family. It is clear from Perpetua’s autobiography that both women were loving and devoted mothers, but that love of Christ and devotion to Truth was truly at the center of their lives. Saint Margaret of Clitherow The wife of an English butcher and wealthy chamberlin, Margaret bore three children. Her life was incredibly normal, except for the fact that she converted to Catholicism shortly after it had been condemned and renounced by Henry VIII. She was an anchor for the Faith within her community, organizing Masses in her home, hiding priests, and encouraging other secret Catholics. She was arrested many times, even giving birth to one of her children in prison. On her final arrest charges, she pled guilty immediately in order to protect her children (who were also Catholic) from being tortured for information. She died on Good Friday, pregnant with her fourth child. Her two sons grew up to become priests and her daughter entered the convent. Saint Anna Pak A-Gi A Korean mother of five who herself admitted a lack of intellect. Anna declared that what she lacked in knowledge of Jesus, she would make up for in her loving actions for His glory. She raised her children virtuously and taught them about the love martyrs had for the Lord, even claiming to desire to join them one day. Eventually, she was arrested alongside her husband and eldest son. Both of them apostaized under torture and her children begged her to do the same. With tears in her eyes, she begged them to reconsider their apostasy. She was beheaded after years of grusome torture, but died a happy martyr. Saint Emilia Often referred to as “the mother of saints,” this fourth century woman had ten children, five of which grew up to be canonized Saints! Saints Macrina, Basil, Peter of Sebaste, Gregory of Nyssa, and Theosebia all clearly benefited from her zealous and virtuous instruction. When her children were grown and out of the house, she divided her property among them before founding a monastery for women. She died in the arms of her eldest daughter and youngest son after praying God would bestow on them a special blessing. Saint Brigid of Kildare Very little is known for certain about this patroness of Ireland, but for centuries she’s been claimed as the patron Saint of midwives and babies. Perhaps because she was born on the day of the pagan goddess Brid who was considered a goddess of fertility. Saint Bridget of Sweden A mystic during the Middle Ages, Saint Bridget married a swiss governor and bore eight children.When her children were grown and her husband died, she founded a new religious order. Her daughter Catherine (listed below) assisted in this process, joining the order as well and eventually becoming the abbess. What a unique experience to belong to the same religious order as your daughter! Saint Catherine of Sweden A celibate nun herself, Catherine became a source of spiritual counsel for many mothers in the 14th century who had experienced miscarriages or other complications in their pregnancies. Thus, she is the patron Saint of miscarraige and can be called upon for aid with a healthy pregnancy. Saint Frances of Rome A loving wife and mother of three, Frances gave lavishly from her family’s own possessions so much so that it sometimes angered her household. One particular occurrence happened during a famine when she completely emptied their storehouse of grain. Her husband objected in frustration, but upon entering the granary he found it full of wheat so immaculate, he remarked that it had to have been harvested by angels. A similar occurrence happened when Frances gave away the last of their wine from the cellar. Her father-in-law became angry, so Frances turned the spicket of an empty cask and wine miraculously poured forth. Upon tasting it, the patriarch was shocked to discover it was the best wine he had every tasted. Saint Frances knew that she could never be more generous than God. Saint Rita of Cascia A saintly wife and mother of two boys, accounts tell of how Rita’s virtue and countenance were a great comfort to her husband, especially because of his highly stressful job. Tragically, political unrest made her husband a target for some unhappy men who ambushed and killed him. Rita’s sons were teenagers at the time, and very hot-headed. She feared they would seek revenge and murder the men who killed their father. Rita prayed, and both boys ended up dying of natural causes before those sins could take place. Though mourning their presence on earth, she rejoiced in their (most likely) saved souls. She joined the order of Augustian nuns and lived out the reminder of her life with their order. Saint Jane Frances de Chantal Beautiful Jane was raised by her widowed father and married off to the son of his friend. Her husband Christopher was a French courtier and spent much of his time in service to the king. Jane dutifully looked after their home and raised their four children where she was known for her fairness and generosity. Tragically, her husband died in a hunting accident which left Jane struck with anxiety for much of her life. It was due to the help of Saint Francis deSales that she found healing and eventually started a religious order alongside him. However, she did not abandon her children. Before joining her order she ensured marriages and households for all her children where they were well looked after. Saint Marie of the Incarnation Marie’s holiness was apparent from a young age as she had her first mystical experience at the age of seven. Ten years later she was married to a French silk merchant and bore him a son before becoming a widow just two years into her marriage. When her son was grown, she joined the Ursuline sisters and was assigned to sail to Canada. There she helped to build their first convent in the country and also educated the Indigenous people (specifically the Iroquis and Algonquin). Saint Elizabeth Ann Seton The first American born person to become a canonized Saint within the Church, there are loads of reasons to admire this woman. She lived on Wall Street and was a prominent socialite. She was also a devout member of her Episcapol church and dedicated to her step-mother’s social ministry—nursing the sick and dying among family, friends, and needy neighbors. Elizabeth herself birthed five children before the death of her husband, which was caused by his lifelong tuberculosis worsening due to the stress of losing their business. Elizabeth’s entire world collapsed around her, but it was in this collapse that her late husband’s Italian business partners introduced her to Catholicism. Elizabeth soon converted. She is perhaps most famous for her founding of the first parochial school in the United States. Saint Joaquina Vedruna de Mas Attracted to religious life, Joaquina was saddened when she was rejected by the order she had wished to join. A couple of years later, she met her husband and discovered how much they had in common—including the fact that both of them had desired to join religious communities. They decided to marry and together had nine children that they raised in a loving home. During the French Revolution, when Napoleon invaded Spain, the Vedruna family moved to the countryside to try and avoid the harsh effects of war. Joaquina’s husband went to join the troops and defend their country, and she navigated keeping their family safe and healthy during the tumult. Her husband did return alive, but his health was frail and he died unexpectedly when she was thirty-three. Joaquina used her inheritance to set her children up for success, and after all her children were adults with families and professions, Joaquina founded a religious order that cared for the sick and educated children. Blessed Concepcion Cabrera de Armida A joyful spirit who grew up during the Mexican Civil War, she lived through the religious persecutions that accompanied the civil unrest. She was married for twenty-two years, a mother to nine children, and author of thousands of mystical meditations about the Spirituality of the Cross. Saint Ann This list would not be complete without the biological grandmother of Jesus. Saint Ann had Mary in her old age and thus understands the difficulties of infertility as well as the joy of unexpected pregnancy. She’s a suited intercessor for motherhood, if not only for the reason that she passed on her faith and love for God so well that Mary chose faithfulness herself. Saint Elizabeth A patroness of infertility, Elizabeth was a cousin of Mary, possibly helped to raise her, and was also pregnant alongside her. Scripture tells us of Mary’s famous visit to see her impossibly pregnant cousin, and also that Mary stayed until John was born. Is it plausible that Mary was in the room when Elizabeth gave birth to this miraculously conceived child? Absolutely! Thus we can ask Saint Elizabeth to pray for a similar situation for each one of us! Saint Helena of the True Cross Helena was the mother of Constantine the Great, the emperor who legalized Christianity within the Roman empire and ended the official persecutions of the Early Church. A convert herself, Helena traveled to the Holy Land with the patronage and protection of her son. In her early sixties, this was no easy journey, as the city of Jerusalem and much of the surrounding areas had been destroyed in centuries past due to revolt. The region was unsafe, due to outside people as well as the structural shambles of destroyed buildings. Pagan temples had been erected over sites such as calvary and the tomb of Jesus, but Helena uncovered many relics and holy pieces -- including the true cross of Jesus which elicited many miracles at its discovery. Saint Monica The single Christian in her household, Monica’s husband, mother-in-law, and three children were all unsupportive of her Faith. In fact, sometimes they were even combative and insulting in regards to her belief. Monica bore it all with virtue, struggling greatly through it all. But in the end, her faithfulness and love inspired the conversions of her entire family, including her most famous son, Saint Augustine. Saint Olga of Kiev In the Eastern Orthodox Church, Olga is venerated at the same level as the Apostles. This is because her grandson Vladimir brought Christianity to all of Russia. Why is this also attributed to her? It was through her fierce, motherly protection (which included burning and burying enemies alive) that she was able to protect the kingdom for her son after her husband was murdered by an enemy. Saint Adelaide Though an Empress, Adelaide’s life was far from easy, in fact, it would make for an exciting screenplay! It included the death of her first husband, being locked in a tower for refusing to marry another, a swampy escape, and the marriage proposal of another faithful man at the other side. Adelaide was the mother of five children, two of whom went on to become nuns. But it was not all happily-ever-after, either. Not only was she widowed a second time, she also endured a tumultuous relationship with her daughter-in-law, which including her being sent away from court for a time. In another turn of events,the two women united at the death of her son and worked together to protect his young heir and prevent usurpation. Saint Margaret of Scotland Margaret was a princess of Wessex who escaped to Scotland after an invading king conquered her homeland. King Malcom of Scotland fell in love with Margaret as she was beautiful both inside and out. Together they had eight children, and Margaret’s grace and virtue transformed the Scottish court from a place of rowdiness and promiscuity to a place of civilized grace. Saint Elizabeth of Hungary A princess who got to marry the man she loved, Elizabeth birthed and raised three children. With the support of her husband the king, Elizabeth did not live a lavish or relaxed life. Instead she worked among the poor and sick in hospitals, peasant homes, and even the streets. The stories of her generosity and service are so great that Emeritus Pope Benedict XVI pinpointed her as the model for all people in leadership positions. Saint Jadwiga of Poland Poland’s first female monarch, Queen Jadwiga inherited the throne at the age of ten upon the death of her father. She broke off her engagement to a foreign friend she had grown up alongside in order to marry a Polish man who had much more interest in what was best for their country. Jadwiga was a prayerful woman and devoted queen who did much to restore the Catholic Faith in her homeland. She and her husband had one daughter. Blessed Anna Maria Taigi Blessed Anna Maria Taigi is honored as having been an exemplary wife and mother to seven, though in the earlier years of her marriage she had an adulterous affair due to the verbal and emotional abuse of her husband. Through prayer and outside help, they were able to heal their marriage. From that point on, Anna Maria grew monumentally in the Faith, to the point where she was frequently in ecstasy, worked miracles of healing, read hearts, foretold deaths, and saw visions on the coming of future events. She became an advisor to cardinals, world leaders, and even three popes. Saint Zelie Martin An accomplished artisan and business woman, Zelie was a “working mother” as she ran a highly sought after lace shop in Alecon, France. She and her husband had nine children together, tragically having to bury four of them at a young age. Her immense grief is present in letters she wrote to family, but through it all, she found comfort in the truth that she’d hold them again in eternity. Of her five surviving daughters, every single one went on to become a religious sister, the most famous being Saint Therese of Lisieux. Saint Gianna This popular and modern-day Saint is often looked to for by Catholic mothers for her intercession against pregnancy complications. This is because Saint Gianna faced birth complications herself during her fourth pregnancy. She chose the treatment option which put her own health at risk, but gave her child the best chance of survival. Gianna delivered a healthy baby girl, and passed away days later due to septic peritonitis. When she was canonized in 2004, her husband and all four children were present at the Mass. Blessed Chiara Corbella Petrillo Chiara lived a simple life of extraordinary holiness. Married in 2008 to her husband Enrico after an unlikely meeting while on pilgrimage, the couple conceived their first child quickly. When it was discovered the child was not growing properly, the doctors advised abortion. Chiara and Enrico refused. Chiara carried her daughter to term, and spent thirty minutes with the child before she passed away newly baptized. The second pregnancy was tragically similar, and their son died thirty minutes after he was born. During her third pregnancy, it was discovered that, this time, it was Chiara who was sick. By the time she gave birth to their healthy baby boy, the cancer had progressed too far. Chiara lived for another year, dying in 2012, describing her cross as “very sweet.” Community, Not Competition Though all these women were mothers, it was not motherhood alone that defined or sanctified them. They are all remembered and esteemed for the unique and individual ways they assisted in building the Kingdom of God. When reading through a list of such holy and courageous women, it can be easy to begin comparing ourselves to them and find ourselves falling short. However, there is not a Saint in Heaven who wants us to be doing such a thing. These women are certainly not judging us or comparing on any level. They are rooting for us whole-heartedly, wanting us to thrive in this life! So call on them for encouragement and help. Print off this litany. Keep it close (you can download it here) and pray it often. Is there anyone you think should be added to this litany?   [bctt tweet="Litany of Saints for Expectant Mothers #BISblog //" via="no"]

Imagine you are in a dark chapel. It is peaceful and you decide to stay and pray. You take a seat in front of the image of Mary and the Christ Child. Notice Mary’s gaze. Where is she looking? At Jesus? At you? What does her posture indicate? Is she pointing, beckoning, nursing? Is she inviting you to draw nearer to her? Her Son? Where are they? Where is Jesus’ attention? What other symbols are present in the background or foreground? Candles flicker from within the red glass. Here you are in the first quiet moments of prayer, and already the images have naturally led you to a contemplative space. The purpose of icons is not just to add beauty to a place of worship, although they do, but to also add depth and inspiration for prayer within that space. Religious art forms contribute in a variety of ways, none more than icons. Pay Attention to Icons One of my favorite ways to make prayer feel more guided or tangible is to use images. Art can offer great, prayerful invitations both to the artist and to the viewer. Likely many of us have had a similar experience where a picture has inspired us to think of God in new ways. Formally this has been called visio divina, or sacred seeing—the sister to lectio divina, or sacred reading. I love the variety of ways that the stories from the Saints and figures from Scripture can be pulled out and brought to life in living color in the prayerful hands of an artist. Icons, in a very particular way, call the viewer to a posture of prayer by connecting the audience with God through the use of holy figures and scenes. Not only that, but the icon itself is intended to offer a loving, heavenly gaze to the viewer. In technical terms, the viewer doesn’t view an icon, she "reads" it. The Symbolism in Icons The symbols included in each icon are significant enough to tell a bigger story while remaining simple: Saint Joseph, for example, would likely be depicted with a lily and/or some sort of carpentry tool such as a square to remind the viewer that Joseph was a carpenter as well as head of the Holy Family. Saint Mary Magdalene is most often depicted pointing to an egg, the symbol of new life, calling to mind her discovery of Jesus at the empty tomb in the Resurrection accounts in the Gospels. The Trinity is famously depicted as three identical but distinct Persons whose clothing color distinguishes the various attributes of each person of the Godhead which communicates their heavenly, royal, and earthly identities. Even the corners of the table in the image is meant to signify the fulfillment of the four Gospels. There is so much more to reading this particular icon and all icons, I’ll refer you to further resources below. An Opportunity for Deep Prayer and Understanding Iconography is a very specific art-form. We can thank the Eastern Orthodox Church for really holding onto this tradition and in a particular and sacred way. There was a time when icons were seen as idolatry and looked upon as scandalous rather than symbols that lead the faithful into deeper reflection and many have been destroyed. The Making of an Icon Icons always depict a religious theme, but not all religious art are considered icons. Unlike other art forms that can be equally prayerful, iconographers adhere to a somewhat regulated and intentional process. From start to finish, the creation of an icon is an exercise in prayer and is littered with symbolism from materials to practice. Because icons tell a larger story, the content of the images is of the utmost importance. There are clear guidelines related to how God the Father, Son, and Spirit can be depicted to offer the clearest theology to those who will use it for prayer. The result is intended to be a window into Heaven: Icons are painted on wood. The wood serves as a reminder of the Tree of Knowledge and life before the Fall. The wood is wrapped in linen. The linen is a symbol of the cloth Jesus was wrapped in while in the tomb. The artist prepares and cleans the block and prays for a specific image to “write.” Icons are often detailed with gold gilt to emphasize the light of God. The clay and glue used to finish the icon itself is intended to remind the artist of the creation account in which Adam was formed by the clay of the earth. Even if you don’t have a collection of fine art in your own home, chances are that you have encountered icons of Christ or Saints at your parish, on retreat, or even in art museums. These are easiest to identify by the halo around the image, signifying the illuminating light of Christ. Icons can be as large as wall art or as small as a prayer card. Entering Into Prayer, Visually In the same way, each of us is a unique manifestation of God’s creative love, it should come as no surprise that forms of prayer vary widely, too. Having a wide variety of options for prayer is a tremendous gift. Whether that means we adopt one tried and true method our whole life through, or we change frequently to supplement our prayer lives, paying attention to the best way to be drawn into conversation with God. Although I hope you have been captivated by the depth and significance of icons, and how and why they should be used in prayer, I have only scratched the surface of their depth or history. I want to encourage your further exploration. If you have a favorite icon to pray with, consider finding a book at the library and digging deeper into meanings you might have missed. If you haven’t prayed with icons before, a quick google search or a trip to your local Catholic bookstore can be an eye-opening endeavor. For further reading // Why Icons Should Be Part of Cathoilc Catechetics Icons in the Western Church, Jeana Visel, OSB The Art of the Icon, Paul Evdokimov Icon Writing (video) Do you have a favorite icon? What strikes you most about it?   [bctt tweet="The Beauty + Significance of Icons in the Church #BISblog //" via="no"]   This post contains affiliate links. Thanks so much for supporting the ministry of Blessed is She!

I remember sitting in the dining room of my sorority house one day as I ate lunch. A few of my sorority sisters were standing around, and I was paying much more attention to whatever I was eating than to what they were saying. My ears perked up though when I heard one of them say the word “Lent.” I had been leading a Bible study in my sorority for a while, and I was always hoping for more girls to join. These particular sisters of mine had never come to Bible study, so I was pretty surprised, and quite honestly thrilled, to hear them talking about Lent. My excitement turned to sorrow, however, as I overheard the rest of their conversation. “I’m going to give up sugar so I can get ready for my trip to Cabo over Spring Break.” “I’m cutting out bread—I really need to lose a few. And maybe I’ll go to the gym every day, too.” It devastated me to hear these women, my friends, talk this way. It didn’t upset me as much that they were planning on superficially adopting the religion I practiced for 40 days, but I was unsettled by the way in which the beauty and hope of the Lenten season had been reduced in their minds to the coldness and restrictiveness of a diet. A Lent Diet? I don’t blame these women at all. The world in which we live makes this sort of warped view of fasting almost impossible to avoid. How can we possibly untwist dieting from the concept of self-denial for a greater good? And how can we combat lies that we aren’t good enough as we are, that our bodies need to look a certain way in order for us to be successful, wanted, or loved? The falsehoods spoken to us by diet culture are deafening. When Lent rolls around, it can somewhat seem like everyone becomes a Catholic, not for the purpose of spiritual growth or deepening their relationship with Jesus, but instead as an excuse to diet in a way that is publicly accepted and even celebrated. Turning Lent into a diet isn’t just something that happens among non-Catholics either. There is a strong temptation for those of us who are Catholic to make the season about ourselves instead of about God. Not only can this misuse of Lent inhibit our capability to receive the graces God wants us to experience during this time, but attributing spiritual significance to our successes and failures at dieting is downright dangerous. Doing so opens the door for us to judge ourselves—our worth and our goodness—based on how well we adhere to the restrictive rules we’ve set for ourselves. And this is not what Lent is about.   Closeness and Conversion The season of Lent should be a time during which we experience a new closeness to Jesus Christ as we remember the sacrifice He made for all of humanity through His Passion and Death. Through this season, we have the opportunity to learn more about God’s infinite love and mercy and to enter more fully into the personal relationship He desires with each of us. It is a chance also to understand ourselves better, to grow in humility as we come to recognize and confront our human weakness, and to invite God into those spaces where we need grace to overcome our shortcomings. Unfortunately, instead of being reaffirmed in our authentic identities, we can easily end up at Easter feeling dejected after devoting all of our energy toward the pursuit or maintenance of a false identity: our image. What about Fasting? For many of us, dieting has impaired our ability to see fasting as anything more than a means to a selfish end. When we think of denying ourselves of any type or amount of food, our minds can be quick to snap to the end goal. How can I use this to my advantage? What’s going to make my body look the best by the end of this? But our attempts to control the physical outcome of our efforts only get in the way of our ability to receive the graces God can work through them. Instead of growing in appreciation for the blessings we have, we become focused on our lack of satisfaction with our bodies. Instead of realizing our profound need for Him, we become self-reliant. This Lent could be different. Being Truly Transformed Jesus is extending an offer for each of us to come to Him as we are. Some of us might be in a place where fasting dietarily is not an option. I urge you, when considering your Lenten fast, to ask Jesus where He wants to meet you and to seriously think about your motivations. If any part of you is tempted to turn fasting into dieting, choose differently. Remember that Lent is not about restricting under the guise of holiness. It is about becoming more you, not becoming less of you. And if you, like my well-intentioned sorority sisters, are not Catholic or are new to this whole Lent thing, why not explore its true meaning? I guarantee the results will be far more significant than those of any diet. At the end of Lent this year, who do you want to see when you look in the mirror? A “successful” dieter, or a more whole version of you?   [bctt tweet="The Lent Diet #BISblog //" via="no"]   Erica Carnohan is a Southern California-based content creator, website developer, and burrito enthusiast. She enjoys having deep conversations over strong cups of coffee, evangelizing through the media, and creating digital art. You'll either find her reading on the beach or playing in her backyard with her four pet chickens.

So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God. // 1 Corinthians 10:31 Love this beautiful print from Carolyn of Brass & Mint Co. Let His word dwell in us richly, sisters. Remember, Members, you get this for free! Log in and download! Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper

There comes a time in our lives when a person, event, or loss leaves our heart wounded. Sometimes that pain is easy to cope with. We rely on friends, or family, or a gallon of ice cream. There are other times when that pain feels too much to bear, as if there is a large gash left in our chest. In those moments, we are encouraged to pray, to lean in and rely on God’s love and mercy. Yet for some who have been through repeated pain or trauma, that love and mercy can seem like a foreign concept altogether. What is Divine Mercy, and how does one practically heal from emotional wounds through it? What steps can they take? Divine Mercy is “Love’s Second Name” Throughout the Old Testament, two Hebrew words are translated into “mercy”: hesed and rachamim. Hesed refers to steadfast love, as described in Isaiah 54:10: For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you… The word rachamim comes from the Hebrew word rechem, or womb. Think of it as the love a mother has for her child. In the New Testament, the Greek word eleos was often translated to “mercy”. Eleos is loving kindness, or tender compassion toward those who are suffering. Pope Saint John Paul II referred to mercy as “love’s second name” in his encyclical Dives in Misericordia (Rich in Mercy, 1981). Based on the definitions above, mercy can be seen as the result of God’s love for us. It is the expression of God’s love when He reaches out to us with compassion during times of need and brokenness. Accepting Divine Mercy How can one accept that expression of love from God and heal? The answer lies in trusting that God will show that mercy toward us, no matter our circumstances or feelings. When I worked as a therapist, I often had to teach clients the importance of identifying and mastering emotions. It is important to recognize that you are more than the ever-changing tides of your thoughts and feelings. Through practice (and therapy!) one may begin to be in charge of those emotions, and to not get swept away by them. They are often circumstantial, and they can change. From a Catholic perspective, it is important during those times as well to remain disciplined in prayer and to trust in God. To take the focus off of yourself and onto Christ. When we see that God’s love and mercy are present no matter how we may be feeling, then we can open up our hearts to that expression of His love. I like to refer to it as “getting out of my own way.” Vulnerability with God The easiest way to start this is to be vulnerable in prayer with our true thoughts and feelings, as in your raw feelings, your darkest and most hurt parts of you. Do not be afraid to express them to God. Do not be tempted to hold those back. As a mom, my children often lay their heads on me and cry with their entire bodies. Allow God to do the same for you: to wrap you in love, to show you His tender love and compassion. He wants to sit with you and love you through those feelings, as any parent would. Divine Mercy and Healing Trusting that God is greater than any of the feelings you are experiencing can help you use prayer and other coping skills even in times of high emotions. Still believing in God’s love and mercy—that it never fails—can also lead to healing. Psalm 136 states that, “His mercy endures forever.” No matter what we have done, no matter what has been done to us, God’s Heart longs to help us. Saint Faustina gives us a beautiful prayer that we can say during times where we are struggling to rely on God’s mercy: Eternal God, in whom mercy is endless and the treasury of compassion — inexhaustible, look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us, that in difficult moments we might not despair nor become despondent, but with great confidence submit ourselves to Your holy will, which is Love and Mercy itself. // Diary, 950 If we truly believed God’s love for us, if we believed His compassion and care for our wellbeing never leaves us, how would we respond? It can be difficult to let others care for us when we are hurting. At times I myself have wanted to push people away. Yet when we allow ourselves to be shown mercy, we allow ourselves to be vulnerable. We allow ourselves to let it all out, which in turn allows us to heal. To move forward despite the pain, fear, or sadness we may be feeling. For our hearts to be made new.   [bctt tweet="Divine Mercy for the Brokenhearted #BISblog //" via="no"]   Christie L. is a therapist turned stay at home mom living in Ohio with her two children and husband. You can find out more about her here.

My dearest friend, Amy, is Jewish. She’s even employed by the synagogue community that is her spiritual home. Beyond that, she is a seeker. God has been the subject of many of our best and most challenging conversations in the 20 years since we met as freshmen on the very first day of college. We know the intimate twists and unexpected turns of each other’s faith journeys. A few years ago, on my fortieth birthday, my family surprised me by delivering Amy to our front porch (she lives several states away). My husband Todd had arranged a three-day girls’ weekend for us, finessing the complicated schedule for our family of eight in my absence. The Importance of Retreat Amy and I arrived in Fredericksburg, eager to sample the local wineries’ wares and to catch up on months of history. As much as we talk about the everyday happenings of our lives, from our children’s quirky habits to the foibles of teenaged marriages, the faith question is never far from the forefront of our conversations. A great deal of the conversation was about our youngest son, Oscar, who had been diagnosed with multiple lifelong disabilities. Amy had walked in lockstep with me through the valley of that impossible year of Oscar’s sickness and diagnosis, with an intimacy tempered only by distance. She knew the absolute and blackest depths of my despair. She knew, too, the giddy heights of my soul’s rebirth, the wild and unbridled joy that was born during a miraculous pilgrimage to Lourdes that Todd, Oscar, and I had taken a few months before this getaway—a joy that persisted despite medical setbacks and uncertainty. And she found it all... curious. Compelling, but a source of more questions than answers. I love talking about Faith with Amy; the conversations are always complex and challenging. She is outside the echo chamber of my life surrounded by orthodox Catholics and homeschooling moms. She forces me to consider, to explain, and to question my assumptions, a process that always ends in fortifying some, amending others. These days of freedom were a gift to both of us, a time to reconnect with each other and wrestle with the most important questions in the world. Living the Life of the Beloved I had always thought she would love Henri Nouwen’s book, Life of the Beloved, written as an attempt to explain the basis of Nouwen’s Catholic Faith to his Jewish, agnostic friend, someone who did not share a common background and vocabulary. The first night in Fredericksburg, after we had retired to drink wine and do a jigsaw puzzle (which is just something that happens when introverts go on vacation, in case that sounds weird to you), I handed her my own dog-eared copy of the book. Over the course of the next few days, she read the entire thing. At the end of each chapter, we talked. She pushed back. I wrestled out loud, with this sister of my soul, around the age-old, elemental questions of what it means to be chosen. Blessed. Broken. Given. The four moments of the Eucharistic prayer, which are echoed in our own spiritual lives. While I was making sense of the “given” stage of my journey, the ways in which I was being sent forth to share what had been poured into me in Lourdes and was now running over, Amy was struggling with the idea of being “chosen” at all. “I just don’t see what it means,” she argued. “I guess I don’t believe in a personal God like that, the kind of Creator who knows and cares about us intimately.” “Don’t believe it’s possible at all, or don’t feel it in your life?” I questioned, as gently as I could. “Maybe the second. But I’m not sure, it might be both,” she wondered aloud. A Deeper Understanding Like the Jewish friend to whom Nouwen was writing, Amy wasn’t convinced, in the end, by the book’s central message. But as we talked, two things happened. My own understanding and certainty coalesced into something stronger, and Amy seemed to accept the transformation that had happened to me at face value. God had taken my doubt, my despair, and redeemed it with His love. Even if Amy couldn’t believe in a God who loved her like that, she conceded that what had happened to our family was not imaginary. Testifying to the Truth In the years before and since, we have volleyed tough, tender questions. “How did your spiritual life change between your reconstructionist synagogue and your conservative one?” I asked when she changed jobs and, by extension, faith communities. “What does it mean to you that President-elect Biden is Catholic?” she wondered after the election. With every question and answer, we aim together at Truth; as fallible humans, we can only approximate it, never quite reaching it on this side of Heaven. We hold each other accountable for our fallacies. We build up our common, interfaith sense of divine wonder and trust in providence. We are living in the time before the Parousia, the bringing-about of Christ’s eternal kingdom. Christ was revealed to the world on the first Christmas; He is revealed anew every day. The revelation of the Mystery continues, not through His very person, but by our own witness and testimony. Have Conversations In my own witness, I’ve admitted to Amy that of course, I’d love for her to convert… because I want my two best friends to get to know each other. I wish I could bottle up belatedness—my deep love of the Eucharist and my friendship with Jesus—and sell it on the street, or at least pass it across the table to my best friend. All I can do is to keep talking about it… and not only to the people already sitting in the pew next to me at our parish or across the table at a Catholic retreat. To testify to His wondrous love, by telling my own piece of the story, one intimate conversation at a time.   [bctt tweet="How My Jewish Best Friend Makes Me a Better Catholic #BISblog //" via="no"]   Christy Wilkens, wife and mother of six, is an armchair philosopher who lives in Austin, TX. She writes about disability, faith, doubt, suffering, community, and good reads. Her first book, a memoir about a Lourdes pilgrimage with her husband and son, will be released by Ave Maria Press in 2021. You can find out more about her here.

“She’s such a good person? Why does she have to suffer?” “I don’t want to go through this pain. I am afraid.” Suffering is something that no one wants to endure. It is scary, lonely, difficult, and painful—whether it is physical, spiritual, mental, or emotional. But suffering is part of life in this fallen world; it is completely unavoidable. Jesus suffered. Mary suffered. The saints suffered. And at some point, all of us will suffer in one way or another. This may sound like a harsh reality. Perhaps it is. Suffering Can Lead to Redemption But the Lord does not allow our suffering to be meaningless. Rather, the mystery of suffering offers redemption. It invites us to participate in the salvific work of the Cross. It leads us to Heaven. And our own suffering also helps others in their ongoing conversion toward Christ. We see evidence for this in Sacred Scripture: “More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” // Romans 5:3-5 “I am now rejoicing in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I am completing what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the church.” // Colossians 1:24 “I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” // Romans 8:18 And the Catechism of the Catholic Church confirms these truths: By his passion and death on the cross Christ has given a new meaning to suffering: it can henceforth configure us to him and unite us with his redemptive Passion // CCC 1505 Moreover, “suffering can also have a redemptive meaning for the sins of others" (CCC 1502). We Are Not Alone Of course, even redemptive suffering is difficult. In the midst of it, we can grow weary and can even lose our faith. The Lord knows that we cannot endure any type of suffering alone. Nor does He want us to. He invites us to entrust our sufferings to Him so that He can give us the grace we need to suffer well, to unite our sufferings to His, and to remain hopeful in the redemptive promises attached to our personal suffering. “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” // 2 Corinthians 12:9 Books about Suffering In addition to Scripture and the Catechism, which offer a plethora of encouragement in the midst of suffering, there are wonderful books that offer guidance and support, too. They explain the redemptive nature of suffering. And they extend comfort and consolation, while enduring personal suffering. Understanding Suffering The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis considers a universal question: “If God is good and all-powerful, why does He allow suffering?” With compassion and wisdom, Lewis answers this question and offers hope to a world in desperate need of healing. Suffering: The Cross of Christ and Its Meaning for You by Dom Hubert van Zeller demonstrates how the 14 Stations of the Cross teach us how to transform our failures into victories, as well as how to ease another's suffering by emulativing Mary’s compassion at the foot of the Cross. This book explains the purpose of suffering, and through Christ’s Passion, we can learn how to bear our own crosses with patience and perseverance. Learning From Others He Leadeth Me is the true story of Father Walter Czizek, who was captured by the Russian army during World War II and falsely convicted of being a Vatican spy. He spent 23 years in Soviet prison and labor camps. Through his complete reliance on God's will, Father Czizek endured extreme hardships and lived to tell others of the fortitude he found in prayer, which gave him an inner peace amidst the horrific evil that surrounded him. Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust by Immaculee Ilibagiza is her personal account of surviving the 1994 Rwandan genocide. Most of Immaculee’s family was ruthlessly murdered, but she survived because of a local pastor’s courage and kindness. For three months, she and seven other women hid in his cramped bathroom. During those long, terrifying days, Immaculee discovered the power of prayer, especially the Rosary. She emerged from the bathroom hideout with a love so strong she was able to forgive her family’s killers. Entrusting Ourselves to God Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence: The Secret of Peace and Happiness by Jean Baptiste Saint-Jure and Blessed Claude de la Colombière is a spiritual classic that invites readers to “be still and know that” God is in control, and He will never send us a trial too difficult to endure. But we must learn how to surrender to God’s will, which will ultimately help us to attain serenity in this world and salvation in the next. Abandonment to Divine Providence by Jean-Pierre de Caussade explains that true abandonment to God is a trusting, peaceful, and childlike surrender, which is guided by grace. This book encourages readers to be present to the moment by accepting our everyday obstacles with patience, humility, and love. Discovering Hope and Healing Searching for and Maintaining Peace: A Small Treatise on Peace of Heart by Father Jacques Philippe discusses the reality that we live in an age defined by agitation and discord. Father Philippe invites readers to respond to the upsetting situations that come our way by embracing the Gospel. Using concrete examples from everyday life, readers discover how to overcome fear and grow in confidence in God’s loving care for us. Interior Freedom by Father Jacques Philippe leads readers to discover that even in the most difficult circumstances, we possess a freedom that no one can take away, because it originates from God. Throughout this book, Father Philippe unfolds a simple but important theory: our interior freedom is in exact proportion to our growth in the theological virtues of faith, hope, and love. This Lent and Beyond A spiritual book about suffering is the perfect companion to our upcoming Lenten journey, although these books can be read and contemplated at any time of the year. Spiritual books on suffering contribute to our understanding of the greatest suffering ever endured: the Passion and Death of Our Lord Jesus Christ. They also help us more fully unite our own sufferings with those that Jesus and Mary endured on Mount Calvary. And the wisdom gained within the pages of these books aid us in easing the sufferings of others. Have you read any of these books? What are your favorite books about suffering through the lens of faith?     [bctt tweet="Books about Suffering (through the Lens of Faith) #BISblog //" via="no"]   This post contains affiliate links. Thanks so much for supporting the ministry of Blessed is She!

One of my favorite things to do is to read past World Youth Day messages and homilies. They always leave me inspired and call me to live a life with and for Christ. After each message, I am ready to live out the strongest desires of my heart and boldly proclaim the Gospel. Recently, I read Pope Francis’ most recent World Youth Day message, one that focused on the theme of Luke 7:14, “Young man, I say to you, arise.” Our Holy Father Francis says to the youth of the world: If you have lost your inner vitality, your dreams, your enthusiasm, your optimism, and your generosity, Jesus stands before you as once He stood before the dead son of the widow, and with all the power of His resurrection He urges you: ‘Young man, I say to you, arise!’ Arising in the Winter Sometimes during these long winter months, I feel like that young man. In moments of the darkness this season can bear, I need to be reminded of the hope and new life the Resurrection brings. I need to listen to the voice of Christ who is telling me to arise! There is a mission that I need to be living out, the mission to live with and for Christ and to love others as I love myself. The time for that mission is now, no matter what season it is. Five Ways to Spiritually Combat the Winter Blues Here are five ways that I hear Christ’s voice clearly inviting me to arise. Whenever I feel down, anxious, unmotivated, fearful, low on energy, or worried, doing one of these five things always helps. We are called to bear Christ's light to the world. And within these winter months, hold onto the words that another holy Francis said, “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” 1. Read the lives of the Saints. The Saints give us insight into the Kingdom of Heaven. Their lives, their writings, and their miracles inspire us and act as a sort of spiritual nourishment. It’s so comforting to know that these very real men and women overcame the lure of worldly power, fame, honor, and pleasure. They accomplished incredible feats within their lifetimes, and brought many people (and still do) to Christ. Even reading a quote by your favorite Saint can be a much needed boost of confidence, a consolation, and food for the journey. The lives of the Saints give us hope. They are friends in the battle, friends on the hard road, friends that compel us to a greater joy. We realize that the men and women now in Heaven experienced similar feelings as us: joys, frustrations, sorrows. Their stories reveal to us how to combat the temptation of despair and rather place our hope and trust in Christ. Their lives inspire us to live with and for Christ. Pick a few Saints this winter to learn more about. Look up some quotes by them or read their writings. Celebrate their feast days! Look up the patron Saint of something you are struggling with and read their story, exploring how they were able to bring Beauty Himself into their lives, environment, and situations. 2. Attend daily Mass. If this isn’t possible, read the daily Mass readings. The most intimate way to unite ourselves to God here on earth is to receive Him in the Sacrament of the Eucharist. He is the Life and the Resurrection. When we eat His Body and Drink His Blood we have life in abundance within us. He grasps us by the hand and helps us to arise, like the young man in Luke 7:14. We are filled with Life and Life in abundance (John 10:10). Jesus, the Word, speaks to us through the Word we encounter in the daily Mass readings. Many times I have gained insight, knowledge, understanding, and clarity in decisions through the daily Mass readings and homilies. Attending Mass allows us not only to consume the Body of Christ but also to be surrounded with His Body, the men and women who are His members. We are never alone in our Faith, we are part of a powerful community that upholds us in prayer, support, and love. Going to Mass, even if there are only one or two other people in attendance, shows us that we are one another’s keepers. We are the Body of Christ, we are His Light in this world. 3. Stick to a routine, no matter how you feel. So often during the winter months I’d rather stay in a cozy, warm bed five more minutes instead of getting up to pray. Yet I always regret when I do that, and I never once have regretted praying. Two years ago I made a promise to myself. I decided that I would be faithful to morning prayer each day no matter how I felt. My prayer started out small, just five minutes each morning, yet I remained faithful to my promise. Now, two years later, I see that fidelity to God and to myself has transformed my life. The fruit of that decision extended into every aspect of my life. I began challenging myself to be faithful no matter the circumstance or my feelings not just in my prayer but also in my daily tasks and duties. Establishing and remaining faithful to a routine, that includes time for God, ourselves, our family, our work, our hobbies, leisure, and our friends allows us to thrive and grow. It leads to both freedom and simplicity. It leads to joy. It allows us to give from a place of abundance. Servant of God Luis Maria Martinez wrote that: The secret of the spiritual life consists in this: that we try, with a spirit of faith and with sincerity of heart, to unite ourselves to God in the midst of all the vicissitudes of life. Our life is so complex! So very many elements enter into it! We are affected by everything, even the weather. Therefore, the wise course is not to analyze those states but to withdraw our spiritual life from them in order that nothing and nobody may rob us of our treasure. Let us learn how to guard our treasure equally well at midnight and at high noon, whether the tempest is unleashed, or the sun shines brilliantly in a cloudless sky. [bctt tweet="The secret of the spiritual life consists in this: that we try, with a spirit of faith and with sincerity of heart, to unite ourselves to God in the midst of all the vicissitudes of life. -SOG Luis Maria Martinez #BISblog //" username="findphilothea"] 4. Pray for holy friends and be a holy friend. Surrounding ourselves with motivating, uplifting, holy, goal-oriented people fills us with inspiration and joy. So often Christ speaks to us through our friends. Our friends may be the ones who tell us to arise! Holy friends are a gift from God that we must pray for every day. Yet we must also pray to be a holy friend to others. Each day we must grow in virtue, not only for our own holiness, but for the holiness of others. All we think, say, and do affects not just ourselves, but others, too. Are our thoughts, words, and actions allowing us to grow into the friend we want to be to others? We must pray to God for friends who we can glorify God with in this life and the next. 5. Do an act of charity. Whenever I feel myself turning inward, the one remedy that always works to curb this is doing something for someone. My go-to for this is making a meal for someone. My love language is food and I feel so loved when someone makes me a meal! The way I express my love the best is by making something delicious for someone. I pray for that person and their family as I prepare dinner and dessert for them and drop it off. Doing something for someone, whether it’s writing a note, creating a spiritual bouquet, cooking a meal, praying a Rosary, or volunteering with a religious order—truly anything done in love for another—uplifts our hearts, minds, bodies, and souls. Here For You This winter season, rest in God’s love for you. No matter what season, He wants you to live with Him, in Him, and for Him. If you are struggling this winter, know you are loved by our Creator and surrounded by a community that is here for you. Do you struggle in the winter? What are some ways you boost your soul?   [bctt tweet="5 Ways to Spiritually Combat the Winter Blues #BISblog //" username="findphilothea"]  

I have become all things to all, to save at least some. // 1 Corinthians 9:22 Love this print from Tisa Muico from today's readings. Let His word dwell in us richly, sisters. Remember, Members, you get this for free! Log in and download! Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper