Some of the women who write the daily devotions you find in your inbox every morning have also crafted books about everything from liturgical living to coping with anxiety from a Catholic perspective. If you're looking for books written by the women you've come to know and trust, we've compiled a list of books written by Blessed is She team members! Books Written by Blessed is She Team Members Grieving Together: A Couple’s Journey through Miscarriage by Laura Kelly Fanucci Drawing from real-life experiences of parents who have experienced this heart-breaking loss, Grieving Together: A Couple’s Journey through Miscarriage is a companion through the common questions, crises, and grief that arise after the death of a child. The book offers Catholic resources for miscarriage, stillbirth, and infant loss, including Scripture, prayers, official Church rites, and theological teaching that speaks to the toughest questions surrounding the loss of a child: Why did God let this happen? Is our baby in heaven? How could this suffering be part of God’s plan? Unlike resources that focus only on mothers, Grieving Together also speaks to the unique concerns of fathers and offers a practical and compassionate guide through grief to help couples grow together through their loss. Everyday Sacrament: The Messy Grace of Parenting by Laura Kelly Fanucci In Everyday Sacrament: The Messy Grace of Parenting, Laura Kelly Fanucci sees the Catholic sacraments through the smudged and sticky lens of life with little ones. From dinnertime chaos to bath-time giggles to never-ending loads of laundry, Laura stumbles into the surprising truth of what the seven sacraments really mean: that God is present always, even in the messes of motherhood. A spiritual memoir of parenting’s early years and a sacramental theology rooted in family life, Everyday Sacrament offers an honest, humorous, and hopeful look at ordinary moments as full of grace. To Bless Our Callings: Prayers, Poems, and Hymns to Celebrate Vocation by Laura Kelly Fanucci To Bless Our Callings: Prayers, Poems, and Hymns to Celebrate Vocation is an ecumenical collection that supports the callings of everyone within the Christian community. This valuable resource of over two hundred prayers, blessings, poems, and sacred songs from diverse Christian traditions speaks to the heart of vocation's richness. -Part I (Ages and Stages) gathers prayers for children, teens, young adults, and adults in mid-life, later, and older adulthood. -Part II (Work and Profession) offers blessings for traditional professions and overlooked occupations--from nurses to truck drivers, janitors to lawyers, salespeople to stay-at-home parents. -Part III (A Year of Blessing) highlights times to preach and pray about vocation throughout the church year and cultural calendar. Drawing from research with hundreds of Christians in congregations across the country about their sense of God's call in their lives, the book fills the gap between Christianity's rich theologies of vocation and people's pastoral needs in living out their callings. To Bless Our Callings is a perfect resource for catechists, musicians, worship leaders, spiritual directors, retreat leaders, campus ministers, and chaplains. The Lazy Liturgical by Jenna Hines The Lazy Liturgical is a liturgical living guide for individuals and families that don’t have the forethought to plan an elaborate celebration. None of the ideas require any planning or special materials; just crack open the book, and start celebrating the Church year! 30 Days to Calm by Jenna Hines Everyone knows someone who suffers from some sort of stress, anxiety, or panic; it may even be you. Spend the next 30 days adding techniques and information to your toolbox, so the next time anxiety arises, you’ll have the skills to be calm. Presented in a journaling format, readers interact with the text each day for maximum learning. Taste and See: Experiencing the Goodness of God with Our Five Senses by Ginny Moyer Taste and See: Experiencing the Goodness of God with Our Five Senses shows how the things we see, hear, smell, touch, and taste are evidence of God at work in our lives. With short, down-to-earth essays and focused prayer exercises, the book encourages readers to recognize the senses as five powerful entry points for the divine to become known to us. Random MOMents of Grace: Experiencing God in the Adventures of Motherhood by Ginny Moyer How do you maintain an active spirituality when your life is consumed by the many demands of motherhood? With honesty and humor, the stories of Random MOMents of Grace: Experiencing God in the Adventures of Motherhood show how there is grace to be found even in the messiest, silliest, and least dignified moments of parenthood. Mary and Me: Catholic Women Reflect on the Mother of God by Ginny Moyer She’s the world’s most recognizable mother, but how does she speak to women today? Mary and Me: Catholic Women Reflect on the Mother of God shares the stories of forty-six women, from their twenties to their nineties. All of them share their candid thoughts on Mary, reflecting on the often-surprising ways that she speaks to their lives. The Catholic All Year Compendium: Liturgical Living for Real Life by Kendra Tierney With wisdom and humor, mother and blogger Kendra Tierney shares how her family celebrates Catholic seasons and feasts—from Advent and Christmas, through Lent and Easter, to Pentecost and beyond. She provides ideas for stories, activities, foods, and decorations that will help you to celebrate your Catholic faith with your family and friends without expertise or much advance planning. A Little Book about Confession for Children by Kendra Tierney Everything you and your child need to know about the Sacrament of Reconciliation (or Confession) can be found in this informative little book with charming four-color illustrations. Perfect for preparing to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation for the first time, this little book is sure to be used over and over again. Traditional Catholic Prayers for Awesome Catholic Kids Series by Kendra Tierney My Superhero Prayer Book, My Fairy Tale Prayer Book, and My Woodland Prayer Book; 23 Traditional Catholic Prayers in the Magisterium-approved translations, decorated with vibrant, fun, full-color illustrations. Have you ever read any of these books? Which of these is next on your TBR list? [bctt tweet="Books Written by Blessed is She Team Members #BISblog //" via="no"] This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase by clicking through one of these links, Blessed is She will receive a small percentage of your purchase at no additional cost to you. Thank you for supporting this ministry by using our affiliate links!

Finals are over! You can smell the home cooking over the dirty laundry in your luggage awaiting a quarter-less washing machine at home. Your bed—not the dorm bed you have endured the past three or four months—awaits your body’s collapse for a Rip Van Winkle like sleep. And then there is home cooking—not the meal plan back at college and not three-day old pizza—that awaits your taste buds and stomach that reminds you, there’s no place like home. Going home for the first time after the excitement of your first semester of Freshman year in college has a lot of things going for it. But there are also some things you might want to consider before heading home the best it can be. Tips for Coming Home from College for the Holidays Expectations https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/243f7386805c48c38c36b4c9e76be0e8.mp4 Everyone has expectations when you come home for the holidays. Your parents want to spend time with you because they have missed you. Siblings may or may not want to spend time with you and they may or may not have missed you (reality check, they may have already taken over your old room). You have missed friends or possibly your boyfriend who went to a different college. But one thing is certain: there are unspoken expectations that need to be communicated. Prior to coming home, talk to your parents about what they have planned for your trip home. Are there any family events you need to know about? Will there be time for you to visit with friends? If you have a weekend trip planned with your friends, share with them your plans and when you are planning to be away. The more you communicate prior to heading home, the less tension there will be when you get home and the less hurt feelings. Help Out Without Being Asked https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/1b864dca1f47436d8cceb682159e46ee.mp4 Often times your family will expect you to help out when you are home. This might include driving younger siblings around, shopping for Christmas gifts, wrapping gifts, baking cookies, doing chores around the house to get ready for guests, or even helping cook. Ask your parents if they need help with anything, clean the bathroom without being asked, and do the dishes after dinner without being asked. This is a sign of maturity. Don’t wait for your parents to ask you to do something; instead, see a need and just respond. It shows your parents you can take care of yourself and that you have been taking care of your self for the past few months. It will go a long way to show respect but it will also help them see the amazing woman you have become. Be Vulnerable and Honest https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/3e9deb70445b491ab78217be602699c3.mp4 Sometimes your first semester has not gone according to plan. Maybe you didn’t get the grades you expected and are now on academic probation. You might be really tight on money and are working two jobs and still not making it and that is causing you a ton of stress. No one expects you to have “adulting” down to a science your first semester. Be honest about what is causing you stress, where you are experiencing loneliness, and where you are just plain struggling. On the flip side, you might be in a new relationship, you have decided that you want to change majors and are really passionate about the new one you have chosen, or you have a chance to go on mission during Spring Break with your university. Share the wonderful things God is doing in your life and give glory to God for how He is teaching you to praise Him and lean into His grace while in college. Self Care https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/fbd31690d5464f879cb460ceb4c2b1f5.mp4 During the first semester or quarter you are not friends with your alarm. Your parents are not going to fully comprehend that your brain has been overworked and you are tired! That and you probably have not been keeping the same schedule you kept as a high school senior. You are used to studying till 9 or 10 p.m. and then going out with friends until the morning hours. Your parents probably don’t know this, but you might want to fill them in instead of hiding it. Be transparent with your parents and it will go a long way. Also, do what you would normally would do for self care. If you are used to working out or going for a run, do it. If you have become vegan, warn your parents and offer to hit Whole Foods with them to share how you have been eating. Maybe you just want to watch the Hallmark Chanel and binge Hallmark Christmas movies (no judgement). https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/fc98906460534e79852381eb7a6ff7ca.mp4 Basically, be sure to care for your self as much as you care for the the ones you love most during the holidays. Divorced Parents https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/5b8a46bd644e41eaa6fa58b7bb5fe9f1.mp4 If your parents are divorced, or going through the beginnings of separation since you went away to college, your winter break will be radically different than your childhood. While you were a minor, holidays were pretty determined by the courts and parents: Thanksgiving with dad and Christmas with mom. Now, as an adult, it might get a little more complicated and you will have more say in where you go on any certain holiday. Keep siblings in mind when figuring out where and when you will be visiting each parent since they are often the ones who have no say in what is going on and you want to be there for them as much as possible. It has been harder on them with you leaving than you realize. More than anything, give over any feelings of loss or hurt to your heavenly Father and be honest with you parents about what you are feeling. The more you can pray through this as a family, the more healing will happen for everyone. Relationships https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/75037e9f0e4f443085af359f675aff59.mp4 Your first Christmas home is always a time where you reconnect with your high school friends you have been texting and FaceTiming with for months. But be prepared for these relationships to be different. You have changed, so it can only be assumed your friends have changed as well. If you have kept up a long distance relationship, your boyfriend more than likely has changed as well. This might mean there are some honest conversations that need to happen, possibly even some distancing of relationships or break ups. For some you might find that you have gown closer because of the distance. Whatever the scenario is, keep Christ in the center of every relationship and ask the question: is this relationship leading me closer to or further away from God? Faith https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/e502645d993a41a1b4bec9439046e671.mp4 There is a strong possibility your faith has changed since going away to college. For some of you, it will be stronger. Others, regular Mass attendance may have slipped in the midst of college schedules. Regardless, be honest with your parents and share where you are in your faith life. If your faith has grown, share with them how much it means to you. Maybe you went on a retreat that had you encounter God in a new way. Maybe, you want to go to the SEEK Conference in January before heading back to school. Discuss what your relationship with God means to you and how it has grown and possible invite your mother into doing the Advent Bearing Light Devotional with you over the remaining weeks of Advent. If your faith has weakened, or if sin has separated you from God, find out when a local Reconciliation service is and get face-to-face with the God who can heal it all. Be open to going to Mass with your family instead of rolling your eyes. Admit to your parents questions you might have about your Faith, but be open to the answers. If your parents don’t have them, find a priest or maybe you youth minister from high school to seek out answers. Basically, don’t close the door and accept being a CEO (Christmas and Easter Only) Catholic. If you have questions, seek answers. https://cdn.shopify.com/videos/c/o/v/14fa0310f05b4af48f6e0ca699fe6ef2.mp4 Enjoy Coming Home! As you can see, going home for Christmas break can have its ups and downs. But hopefully this little list of things to think about will help prepare your heart and have you pray into some things on your plane ride or drive home. Know that we as a Blessed is She sisterhood are praying for you. Will you be traveling home from college this holiday season? What are you most excited for? What makes you the most nervous about coming home? [bctt tweet="Tips for Coming Home from College #BISblog //" username="@SoCalTriciaT"] Tricia Tembreull is a regular contributor to the BIS blog and a devotion writer. She is a California girl with a boundless passion for life. After two decades of ministering to teens and youth ministers as a trainer, ministry mentor, and speaker in Catholic youth ministry, Tricia now serves as Campus Minister at USC Caruso Catholic Center. She loves adventure and seeks it everywhere she goes. As an avid foodie, she enjoys testing new recipes out on friends and family, gathering them around the table to encounter Christ in one another and be drawn to the satisfying unity we crave in the Eucharist.

She, from her poverty, has contributed all she had. // Mark 12:44 How awesome is this wallpaper from Erica of Be a Heart?? Let us each give from what all we have. Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper

Pearls entwine with silk, wine and milk. Life is made to stare up at the stars to converse and share dreams, sorrows, cares. Our Father in Heaven hears every word, counts every blink every wound and sword and flutter of the heart. Hide not and fear nothing. Abba, yours and mine the same, loves you, loves me and sighs so deeply for our love to Him. You know His Name. By Him you were conceived. By Him, knit in your Mother’s womb. There is nothing hidden from his eye, from his heart beating from Time immemorial. Remember This: He loves you as if you were His only child. Deserve it not, but given it we are this love, this gift, bought and paid for by death, death on a Cross. Blood for blood Life for life. Forget it, never. Remember all your days how you are loved, how he has loved you! -Remember, by Molly Marr Reflect The things that we love tell us what we are. St. Thomas Aquinas [bctt tweet="The things that we love tell us what we are. -St. Thomas Aquinas #BISblog #BISrests //" via="no"] Listen For musical inspiration for your restful Sunday, listen to our BIS Rests playlist. [bctt tweet="BIS Rests: Pearls + Silk #BISblog #BISrests //"] Original poem and curation by Molly Marr.

This month we celebrate the feast of St. Elizabeth of Hungary. This beautiful Saint—who was a real life princess—married at fourteen, was widowed at twenty, and died at the age of twenty-four. During her short time on earth she gave herself completely to Christ through serving the poor. She chose a life of penance instead of luxury and was often seen with her kingdom’s poor, bringing bread to them each day. St. Elizabeth of Hungary is a special Saint to me, and one that I thank often. She, along with four other men and women in Heaven, gave me a gift. A gift I prayed for each day for many years. One of the greatest blessings my mother bestowed upon me was a love for the Saints. When I was twelve years old, she handed me a prayer card of Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati. I took one look at the handsome man on the prayer card and told my mom, “I’m really happy we are Catholic.” She smiled and told me to recite the words on the back of the prayer card. As I prayed that prayer each day, I felt drawn to learn more about him. An Interesting Connection... One of the things that struck me when I read about Blessed Pier Giorgio’s life was the age of his death. He died at the age of twenty-four. How incredible that a man so young was declared a Blessed in Heaven! I remembered another beloved Saint, Saint Thérèse of Lisieux, died at that age too. I began researching “Saints Who Died At Twenty-Four” and discovered a few more: Saint Elizabeth of Hungary, Saint Gabriel of Our Lady of Sorrows, and Saint Kateri Tekakwitha. I began praying to these five men and women in Heaven each day. I was so inspired by their lives, that they were able to live out the Gospel in a profound way in such a short time. Their lives are witness to the reality of God’s grace–that God knows no time, that grace is found in the present moment, and that faith is pure gift. My Request in My Twenty-Fourth Year I felt called to pray for a gift from these five Saints during my twenty-fourth year. Every day, throughout each day, I asked for their intercession, for my gift. I told them that they received the best gift at the age of twenty-four: to enter into Christ’s kingdom. I asked that they might send me a gift just like they obtained during their twenty-fourth year. I prayed this prayer daily for years. As my twenty-fourth birthday approached, I decided to start a young adult group in Buffalo, New York. I had just moved to Buffalo and was attending nursing school. I didn’t know many people and I desired real community and authentic friendships with my entire heart. So I decided to create a young adult group in honor of Blessed Pier Giorgio. Our first meeting was held just as I turned twenty-four. The Best Gift I met the most beautiful people in that group, some of whom are my dearest friends. And I received my gift. I met Mike, my husband, my gift, in the group. I know it is through the intercession of these five Saints that I met the man I was going to marry, that I was led to my vocation. During our engagement, I collected images of these five Saints. I framed them and placed them on a small table beside the alter during our wedding Mass. The priest blessed them after we said our vows and they now hang in our home. These images are a powerful reminder of our wedding day, the vows Mike and I promised to one another, and the fidelity of the Saints towards us! Pray for Your Gift My sisters, pray for your gift. Ask these Saints–so active in Heaven–for your gift. Whether you are eighteen, twenty-four, forty-four, or one hundred and four, ask these Saints for a gift. They are ready to send us Christ’s love, guidance, and grace. Saint Elizabeth of Hungary Patroness of bakers, countesses, death of children, falsely accused, the homeless, nursing services, tertiaries, widows, and young brides. Feast Day: November 17 St. Elizabeth of Hungary, I often turn away from Christ and desire a life of luxury, power, and greatness. Help me to be humble like you and desire instead to serve Christ in the poorest of the poor. Help me to always choose Heavenly poverty instead of earthly riches. Please send me my gift, the gift God has specifically ordained for me from the beginning of time. Saint Thérèse of Lisieux Patroness of florists, missionaries, pilots, and priests. Feast Day: October 1 Sweet Little Thérèse, Doctor of Merciful Love, fill my heart with trust! Help me to imitate you! I pray that I may become so little that Christ may pick me up, that He may lift me safely into His arms and hold me close. Teach me to fall in love with Christ’s Merciful Heart. Please send me a rose, send me my gift, the gift God has specifically ordained for me from the beginning of time. Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati Patron of students, mountaineers, and World Youth Day. Feast Day: July 4 Blessed Pier Giorgio, I desire to live a life fully for Christ. I want a life full of adventure, a life full of love. I want to flourish. I know Christ is the answer. Help me find Him in the beauty – the beauty of a hike, the beauty of the Eucharist, the beauty of the Rosary, the beauty of a suffering heart. That is where you found Christ, and I ask you to lead me to the beauties here on earth so that I may fully and joyfully gaze upon His beauty in Heaven. Please send me my gift, the gift God has specifically ordained for me from the beginning of time. [bctt tweet="I want a life full of adventure, a life full of love. I want to flourish. I know Christ is the answer. #BISblog //" username="findphilothea"] Saint Gabriel of Our Lady of Sorrows Patron of clergy, students, and the youth. Feast Day: February 27 St. Gabriel, you had a strong devotion to Mother Mary. Please lead me closer to her. You suffered greatly during your last days–please teach me to suffer gracefully just like Mother Mary, who suffered so courageously at the foot of her Son’s Cross. Please send me my gift, the gift God has specifically ordained for me from the beginning of time. Saint Kateri Tekakwitha Patroness of orphans, ecology, and the environment. Feast Day: July 14 St. Kateri, I desire a clean and pure heart. Please help me to always give my best time to Christ. You, who walked miles to receive the Eucharist, knew the secret that I so often forget–that Christ is my great Love, that He is my heart’s desire, that He is my joy. Please send me my gift, the gift God has specifically ordained for me from the beginning of time. What is the gift you will ask for, sisters? [bctt tweet="St. Elizabeth of Hungary and Four Other Saints Who Died at 24 #BISblog //" username="findphilothea"]

Our social media feeds are lighting up with the sharing of this year's Advent Journal, Bearing Light. We've all been captivated by the beautiful cover design, which will compel us deeper into prayer as we journey through this Advent as a sisterhood. Today, we're chatting with the designer of that beautiful cover, Erica Tighe, to talk about her inspiration and hope for Bearing Light. Bearing Light: An Interview with the Designer You design regularly for Blessed is She, and you've designed liturgical journals in the past. What is your creative process for a project like this? I always have this fear that I won’t have an interesting idea for the liturgical journals after designing them for four years. But the beauty of Blessed is She is that a new author writes each year. While it’s the same story for both Advent and Lent, the writer’s interpretation is always different. Each person has dug deeper into a different idea around the season. I start by reading the final copy and saying a prayer to the Holy Spirit to inspire me and give me an idea of the design. I try to think about what the author is trying to convey and how I could bring that idea to life visually. The idea usually comes to me while I am working out or taking a shower. It almost always comes out of left field—something that I wasn’t even thinking of previously and so then I know that it is of the Spirit. Sometimes my heart even beats fast. Before you read Shannon's writing for this particular Advent Journal, did you already have a design or feel in mind, or do you wait to be inspired by her words? I always go into it without any preconceived ideas. I let the words speak to me and design from that place! Did the cover design come to you immediately, or were there trial and error designs beforehand? On my own idea, I was thinking of designing an actual light. A lamp of sorts, with the bulb shining down. I wasn’t in love with the idea and was praying more and more for Divine guidance. After a work out one day, I was laying on the ground, and the image of all these ladies popped into my head. I was so inspired by this idea that we are all called to bear God’s image. Mother Teresa and Josephine Bahkita were such good examples to all of us. I am called, and you are called, to do the same. I felt like this design was brought to me by Mary and she wanted to call out to all of us that we are called to be the light in this world. What challenges did this design process present? What obstacles did you have to overcome? Gold leaf on complicated designs always poses a problem. Our printer told me that he wasn’t going to be able to line up the gold leaf of the halos on top of the paintings and I begged him to try. I promised I thought it would work. I am so glad I convinced him to do it, because it came out exactly like it was in my head. Ok, tell us about the cover itself! What does it mean? What message do you hope it conveys? Are the women modeled after real life women? Tell us everything! I wanted to show that the Saints that Shannon wrote about in the Journal are women like us. I wanted to show women of different sizes, shapes, ages, color. Something I love about Blessed is She—and something I always notice when I attend the BIS retreats—is that all women are involved and included. It’s so inspiring to see women with gray hair raise their hands in praise right next to their young granddaughters. This is a community for all of us. What role, if any, did Our Lady play in the inspiration of and design for this project? I have such a love and devotion for Mary. She accompanies me and pops up in my life in very real ways if I ever drift. This Journal is about her "yes" and I felt her saying to me, “inclusion, inclusion, inclusion.” She is a Mother and example for all of us. I always have little conversations with her throughout the day and the day I painted all these ladies, she was there. Were there any elements of music, art, or nature that inspired and accompanied you during this project? Only the beauty of the Magnificat! You're getting married in December! And you've "lived" Advent already through the prayerful reading and design of this book. How has your preparation for this particular Advent Journal, which focuses on Mary's great "yes," prepared you to give your own "yes" to the vocation God has called you to? We are really close to the wedding now! Back in July when I was painting, my fiancé and I were going through the trenches of engagement. Not only is planning a wedding stressful, but we are finding the planning of new jobs, finding a new home, moving to the same city, etc. to be even more stressful. So I was telling my spiritual director that we were in a period of misunderstandings and difficulty. He said to me, "Good! Engagement is like pregnancy. You’re preparing for new life together and therefore your old life has to literally die. Pregnancy is not easy, your whole body is hijacked. You’ll be tired and not at your best. But it is all good and normal and necessary. And at the end you’ll get this new life and it will be beautiful." And in him telling me it was normal, I had such relief and had a new sense of saying "yes" to the process. To saying yes to the pain of dying and "yes" to the new life that was coming. And truly, truly after waiting until I’m 30 years old to get married, my heart magnifies the Lord and rejoices in God the Savior! Don't forget to order your Advent Journal so you can pray through the Magnificat with us this year! [bctt tweet="Bearing Light Advent Journal // An Interview with the Designer #BISblog #bisadvent //" via="no"] Erica Tighe is a calligrapher and painter in Los Angeles. She is the owner of Be A Heart and prays daily to know God’s will, which always takes her on unforeseen paths. Erica was a missionary in Brazil with Heart’s Home. She loves to ride her bike, take hikes, and throw dinner parties. Olivia Spears lives in Kentucky, where sweet tea and bourbon flow like milk and honey. She works from home as an editor and social media manager while raising her children and laughing with her husband. Although she now spends most of her free time away from the internet, past adventures are still on her blog. You can find out more about her here.

The holiday season is my favorite time of year. I remember childhood memories of our favorite family traditions—everything from camping out watching holiday movies in the living room to baking our favorite desserts and treats in time for family gatherings or parties with friends. To me, life generally feels a little happer, a bit more joyful and magical, around this time of year. However, for many of us, the holidays can be a difficult, perhaps even painful time. Loneliness and Loss During the Holidays Some of you have endured the loss of a loved one, spouse, or child. Perhaps you have estranged relationships with people in your family and you’re not sure how to deal with them, especially as we head into what performer Andy Williams calls, “the most wonderful time of the year.” One of the best tools my counselor has helped teach me over the years is how to deal with difficult—even unhealthy or unsafe—people. It is a tool I think we all need in our emotional toolbox, especially if dealing with certain family members around the holiday season is messy or difficult for you. How to Deal with Difficult Family Members During the Holidays Here are some of the most helpful things I have learned in dealing with those difficult family members. 1. Read the book Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life by Doctors Cloud and Townsend. I think every single adult needs this book. Boundaries (I have found) are the single best way to deal with unhealthy, unsafe, difficult people in your life. It allows you to take control of yourself and your own behavior without becoming responsible for anyone else. Boundaries allow you to take charge of yourself, and choose to respond how much you will let another person’s words, behaviors, or actions affect you. If you’re feeling anxious about seeing certain difficult family members this holiday season, I strongly recommend reading this book. 2. Stay emotionally zipped up. This tool is one I continually use again and again in all areas of relationships in my life. Allow me to explain this a little more. I want you to imagine that we all have an invisible zipper on the inside of our bodies. Only you have access to it and only you can control how much you lower or raise it. When heading into family gatherings, make sure you are emotionally zipped up! Actually imagine yourself zipping yourself up from the inside. Use it as a visual exercise to take care of yourself in what may be not a great interaction. I know it sounds crazy, but I swear by this practice! I share it regularly with other people in my life, and I have found so helpful in my own life. 3. Have helpful soundbites to repeat to yourself. Have a few soundbites stored in your brain to repeat to yourself if you’re starting to feel uncomfortable or triggered by that difficult person(s). One of my favorites is: This is about ____, not about me. And I must not climb into his/her process. Other ones I use are: I will walk away or excuse myself from the conversation if I feel uncomfortable or I can only control myself (my actions and words), I cannot control this person. I find having tidbits to rely on helps me in a pinch until I have time and emotional energy to deal with a situation and how I felt about it. 4. Set limits for long you will be around difficult members. Sometimes you may find yourself in a situation where you have to see certain difficult people around the holidays. If that cannot be avoided, then carefully plan and set limits for exactly how much time you will be around. Have your exit plan already mapped out. Set a game plan and stick to it. You have every right to set limits around how much time you spend with people who sometimes feel not healthy or safe. You’re in the driver’s seat. Do not allow yourself to be pushed around. 5. Focus on what you can change, not what you can’t change. Sometimes in difficult family relationships it is easy to become discouraged, even hopeless, that things will “always be this way.” It can feel overwhelming. But remember to focus on what you can change, what you can control: yourself, your responses, and how much you decide to let something another person says or does have power over you. I have found this helpful to remind myself, “All I can control is me, all I can control is me.” Being Intentional Allows You to Enjoy the Time Holiday gatherings can sometimes be a source of stress and tension because of whom will be there or unhealthy dynamics that might occur. But even if you’re nervous or anxious going into the holidays, you can be as prepared as possible. Know your boundaries and stay emotionally zipped up. When you’re intentional in dynamics with sometimes difficult people, you can feel more relaxed and even (hopefully!) enjoy the event. It might not be perfect, but having a game plan on how you can choose to respond and handle things is the best thing you can do for yourself. It's not impossible. It just takes some reflection, self-awareness, and prayer. What are helpful tools that help you deal with difficult people or relationships in your life? How do you navigate those things? [bctt tweet="How to Deal with Difficult Family Members During the Holidays #BISblog //" username="amoderngrace"] Patty Breen is a regular contributor to the BIS blog and a devotion writer. She is a full-time lay minister who finds joy in running, strong cups of coffee, and all things Ignatian spirituality. A Midwestern gal from the mitten state, she is constantly learning to find grace in all things. She is passionate about ministry to divorced Catholics and women whose relationships have been impacted by sexual addiction. You can find out more about her here.

As a bibliophile and as a Catholic, I have spent my life searching for the best Catholic fiction. Not books that are necessarily explicit in their Catholicism, but good books. Books that are beautiful and that elevate one’s heart to the Good and Beautiful Himself. Fiction Books Every Catholic Should Read Most people are familiar with Tolkien’s The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, as well as C.S. Lewis’ The Chronicles of Narnia, but here are 6 other fiction books that you can add to your TBR list: Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh Brideshead Revisited: The Sacred & Profane Memories of Captain Charles Ryder follows the life and romances of Charles Ryder over a twenty year period. This includes his friendship with the Flytes, a family of wealthy English Catholics who live in a mansion called Brideshead Castle. Brideshead movingly shows the ways in which grace can affect different people and the many ways in which God can draw souls, even those undeserving, to Himself. The novel is gorgeously written, the story haunting, and a book that has left me better for having read it. The Complete Stories by Flannery O’Connor Is a list about Catholic Fiction even complete without Flannery? Flannery O’Connor is a Catholic Southern-American writer known for her sass and violent tales of grace. While O’Connor also has two novels, her short stories really represent her as a writer (and bonus, some you can read in one sitting!) She writes dark and oftentimes bizzare stories full of ironic humor—making them a bit difficult for some to stomach. However, O’Connor’s works spins powerful tales of redemption. O’Connor believed that violent, or extreme situations, reveals our essence revealing the Truth in things. Her stories are reminiscent of the Cross, in that violence brings about healing for the characters. The Brothers Karamozov by Fydor Dostoevsky If you are like me, the thought of reading a 700+ page Russian novel might overwhelm you. But The Brothers Karamozov is worth it. Some of the greatest thinkers of all time lauded the novel (Einstein called it “the supreme summit of all literature”) and our three most recent popes referenced it in homilies and encyclicals. Considered by many the greatest book ever written, The Brothers Karamozov is a family drama centered on a coarse and vulgar father and his three sons. It tackles the fundamental question of how to live best one’s life in an engaging way. The Brothers Karamozov contains a wealth of beauty, making it a must read! The Power and the Glory by Graham Greene As a new mom, it’s been awhile since a book has kept me up late reading. But this novel is a real page-turner! The Power and the Glory tells the story of one of the last priests living in Mexico during the 1930s when being a priest was considered an act of treason. The priest is hunted both by the sins of his past and a paramilitary group wanting his execution. With no other priest to hear his confession, our main character—the unnamed "Whisky Priest"—fears death. This book powerfully and timelessly scours the depths of the human soul and of God's mercy. Do yourself a favor and read it. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley When we think of Frankenstein’s monster (yes, that is actually what he is called), we think of a bumbling, grunting, square-headed creature. And when we think of his master, Dr. Frankenstein, we think of a mad scientist hidden in a lab somewhere. But this couldn’t be further from the truth in Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. In this novel, the mostly sane Dr. Frankenstein obsesses over the progress of humanity; while Frankenstein’s monster has intelligence and personality, and a sincere desire to please his creator. Frankenstein’s monster shows us what life would be like to have a creator who didn’t care for his creation, illustrating to us the gift we have in a Creator who loves and delights in us. East of Eden by John Steinbeck You may have read Of Mice and Men or The Grapes of Wrath in high school, but may be less familiar with this title by author John Steinbeck. East of Eden retells and reshapes the Book of Genesis. Set in Salinas Valley, California, this story follows two families—the Trasks and the Hamiltons—who have reenacted the fall of Adam and Eve and the poisonous rivalry of Cain and Abel for generations. It centers around the idea found in Genesis 4:7 that, “You may turn away from evil and do good.” East of Eden presents humanity in all its radical freedom, freedom given by God, and illustrates that this freedom has dire consequences. It shows how the way you use your freedom affects, not only yourself, but those around you for generations to come. Have you read any of these books? Which has been your favorite? And what's next on your list?! [bctt tweet="Fiction Books Every Catholic Should Read #BISblog //" via="no"] Carissa Pluta is a wife, mother, bookworm, and blogger currently living as a missionary in Birmingham, Alabama. She has Bachelor's Degrees in English and Communication Arts and has a deep desire to create and cultivate beauty in everything she does. Carissa enjoying hiking, Paul Simon, and drinking copious amounts of herbal tea. You can learn more about her here. This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase by clicking through one of these links, Blessed is She will receive a small percentage of your purchase at no additional cost to you. Thank you for supporting this ministry by using our affiliate links!

Artists live with a stereotype of being moody and emotive, their heads in the clouds and their hearts perpetually broken. Something like the way most Catholics seem to be feeling in these recent months since scandal has attacked our Church. I’ve never felt more like that stereotype than one night when I lay awake until four in the morning, my chest aching as though it had been ripped apart and hastily patched back together in a World War I field hospital. What is one to do with pain like that? My faith was not shaken. I felt Christ suffering with me; I knew the pain was His first and His most deeply. He always stands with His Church. But the hurt was real. The betrayal was real. The confusion and apathy creeping into the corners of my consciousness were real. [bctt tweet="I felt Christ suffering with me; I knew the pain was His first and His most deeply. #BISblog //" via="no"] Healing Through Art Well, if I was going to feel like an artist stereotype, I figured I might as well tie that shoe on and wear it running. Because Christian artists have given us a pattern to follow when the world crumbles around our feet. They weep, yes, just as Jesus wept at the death of His friend, Lazarus. But united with the same power that brought Lazarus back from the dead, artists turn mourning into beauty. Out of the ashes of misery, they bring this beauty to stunning, startling life. Bouguereau A striking example of this transformative power of creation is found in the work of William Bouguereau, a nineteenth century French artist. In 1875, Bouguereau experienced the devastating loss of his teenage son, Georges. Bouguereau sunk into a depression. He wept and he railed against the heavens and against earth. After three months of railing, he put his paintbrush to canvas and painted the parent who knew his suffering so well. In his Pietá of 1876, Bouguereau painted Our Lady cradling her Son’s lifeless, submissive form against her chest. Her eyes—like none I have ever encountered in another painting—burn with sorrow and pain as they look out and accuse the world of what it has done. The darkness of her mantle is almost lost in the dark background of the painting, and the blood red of her gown is echoed in the blood still clinging to the crown of thorns resting at her feet. But around this harrowing image of pain sweeps an arch of angels, surrounding Mary, praying, worshiping. One hides his eyes, one beats his breast, some look on in wonder. Their clothing—striking against the darkness of Our Lady’s robes—is all the colors of the rainbow. Bouguereau, even in his grief, was reminding us of God’s promise to Noah: “When the bow is in the clouds, I will look upon it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature...” In the death of Christ, He kept that promise; Christ took on our punishment, and His Mother took on our sorrow. Tolkien Another artist who could, perhaps, understand my World War I field hospital analogy, came home from the terrors of the Great War and took up his pen. Rather than letting the cruelty and evil he witnessed destroy him, J. R. R. Tolkien wrote The Lord of the Rings and gave us a world where we can see evil defeated and witness the happy ending in store for all of us after life’s literal and metaphorical battles. Anyone who has ever read The Return of the King will remember the shiver of hope and truth he felt when reading of the Grey Havens that waited after death: The grey rain curtain of this world rolls back...and all turns to silver glass. And then you see it. White shores, and beyond, a far green country, under a swift sunrise. J. Kilmer Tolkien’s contemporary, American poet Joyce Kilmer, died as a soldier during the First World War. From the trenches, he wrote: Who fights for freedom, goes with joyful tread To meet the fires of Hell against him hurled, And has for captain Him whose thorn-wreathed head Smiles from the Cross upon a conquered world. The great majority of Kilmer’s poetry was written through heartbreak. Even before the war, Kilmer lost his young daughter to a childhood illness. Her sickness and death did not crush Kilmer’s newfound Catholic faith, but strengthened it, inspiring his best work. A. Kilmer I can only imagine what it must have been like to be Aline Kilmer, Joyce’s widow. Faced with the death of her daughter and the loss of her husband to a seemingly-senseless war, Aline wrote through her grief, supporting her family through her essays and poetry. One poem in particular has been coming back to me, aptly titled “After Grieving.” It ends, powerfully: Athletes who know their proven strength, Ships that have shamed the hurricane: These are my brothers, and at length I shall come back to joy again. However hard my life may be I know it shall not conquer me. St. Therese (another artist) said, “The world’s thy ship, and not thy home.” Certainly that world is facing a hurricane of trouble at present. What will it take for us to ride through the storms, to “shame the hurricane?” We are Artists, Let's Use Our Art As Catholics of the twenty-first century, we are hardly the first to writhe in pain at scandal defacing the beauty of the Church that is our home. The artists now are not the first to have something to say about that corruption with their art. Michelangelo, whose chisel gave us Mary’s crushing sorrow and humble acceptance in his Pietá, whose brush gave us the power and glory of God’s creation of Adam, also wielded his brush to paint a Church official into the fires of hell in his Last Judgment. Yet who notices the twisted figure of that cardinal when confronted with the calm majesty of Christ, judging from Heaven? Michelangelo’s skill in color and composition made him one of the most sought-after artists of his time. Today, it helps us direct our gaze away from ugliness and toward Beauty itself. Whether or not you consider yourself an artist, you were made in the image of God the Creator. Are you crushed by all the ugliness of the world? Don’t let the ugliness win. Ask yourself, how can I mourn like an artist? How can I make something lovely, whether it’s a painting or a song or a dinner for my family? You have the power, through God’s grace, to remind a hurting world of the beautiful God that created it and mourns with it. This is Our Gift, Our Call, Our Task John Paul II wrote his Letter to Artists to you: People of today and tomorrow need this enthusiasm [inspired by art] if they are to meet and master the crucial challenges which stand before us. Thanks to this enthusiasm, humanity, every time it loses its way, will be able to lift itself up and set out again on the right path. In this sense it has been said with profound insight that "beauty will save the world." When your heart is breaking, ask yourself this: how can I flood the world with God’s beauty, the beauty that will save the world? [bctt tweet="Mourn Like an Artist #BISblog //" via="no"] Faith E. Hough is a writer and homeschooling mother of six. She and her artist husband live in Connecticut, where you can find her making art and avoiding laundry. You can find out more about her here.

Loving God, maker of heaven and earth, protect us in your love and mercy. Send the Spirit of Jesus to be with us, to still our fears and give us confidence. In the stormy waters, Jesus reassured his disciples by his presence, calmed the storm, and strengthened their faith. Guard us from harm during this storm and renew our faith to serve you faithfully. Give us the courage to face all difficulties and the wisdom to see the ways your Spirit binds us together in mutual assistance. -Prayer for Protection During a Storm, from Catholic Household Blessings and Prayers Reflect I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination. Jimmy Dean [bctt tweet="I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination. -Jimmy Dean #BISblog #BISrests //" via="no"] Listen For musical inspiration for your restful Sunday, listen to our BIS Rests playlist. [bctt tweet="BIS Rests: Storms + Sails #BISblog #BISrests //"] Curated by Katie Cobb.

The Lord sets captives free. // Psalm 146:7 How awesome is this week's wallpaper from Joe Kim of PAL Campaign?? Remember, you are set f r e e ! You can download this awesome design by clicking here! (Members, log in and get yours for free.) Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper

The Church teaches us how to be good, holy, and loving. She allows us to grow in our relationship with Christ and one another. As a part of this mission, married couples are asked to be open to life. The marital embrace is love-giving and life-giving. When it comes to our human sexuality, knowing our body and the beautiful way we were created by God is important. As women, knowing our cycle and our times of fertility enables us to respect our body. One way we can do this is by learning Natural Family Planning (NFP) and incorporating NFP into our daily lives. Why Not Contraceptives? Within our marriage, my husband and I have chosen to use NFP. We could have chosen to use hormonal contraceptives instead, but we didn’t and still don’t. Why not? Makes Your Body Think You’re Pregnant Hormonal contraceptives were actually designed to make a woman’s body “think” and work like it is pregnant, but with a monthly bleed (depending on what contraceptive you use). The scientists ending up creating a mix of synthetic hormones that allow a woman to have a withdrawal bleed thus creating the placebo effect that her body is cycling regularly. Artificial Hormones Learning more about the birth control pill and other forms of hormonal contraceptives, I learned that these items were pumping artificial hormones into the woman’s body. As women, we have four main hormones that fluctuate throughout our cycle. Knowing that, as a woman, I already had so many hormones that went up and down, putting more hormones that were man-made would most likely only cause additional emotional and physical turmoil. Women Die from Hormonal Contraceptives Digging a little deeper, I learned that when the pill came out, many women died and became extremely sick. What happened next? The scientists lowered the dosage of artificial hormones and still prescribed the pill. Do women still die and get sick from the pill? Yes. Plus new research is showing that the body is more affected by the pill than originally thought (this is why when the pill is prescribed, they have all those warnings on the label in small print). Group 1 Carcinogen The chance of dying and becoming sick was alarming to me, but not as much as when I learned that the pill is a group 1 carcinogen. It's lumped into the same category as asbestos and formaldehyde which is illegal to have in any building. It causes cancer and if people don't want asbestos and formaldehyde in buildings, I knew I didn’t want the pill in my body if it was like those two things. My husband also didn’t want this. Abortifacient The last thing that bothered me about the pill was it can be an abortifacient. What does that mean? It can cause a woman to have an abortion without her even being aware of it. It alters the woman's endometrium lining (making it toxic or unhospitable) which doesn't allow for the baby to implant. Thus the abortion happens. It's Not Just the Pill... I mainly focused on the pill since this is given not only as a form of birth control, but also to women as a way to help with acne, heavy or irregular periods, and more. If a woman is given this for these symptoms, it’s merely a band-aid as it is covering up the root cause of her acne, heavy/irregular periods, and possibly causing more harm to her body and future fertility issues since the pill has fake sex hormones within it. Any type of hormonal birth control (IUDs, patches, injections, vaginal ring, etc. ) puts synthetic hormones into the body and acts similar to the pill. Benefits of Using NFP With learning this about hormonal contraceptives and knowing how taking these can have negative impacts on marriage, relationships, and the environment, NFP seemed to be the best option. There are many benefits in using NFP. Effective When using the guidelines/rules to postpone or avoid pregnancy, NFP methods are 99% effective. This is just as effective as any hormonal contraceptive. *Note: Some women experience hyper-fertility that can make navigating their cycles more difficult. All Natural A big benefit to us is that NFP is completely natural. Nothing is ever put in or on my body or my husband's body. Fertility Awareness NFP is a way to track the woman's fertility. That is why a woman does not have to wait until she is engaged or married to learn an NFP method. Fertility Awareness is a life changer. One woman I know used NFP for 20+ years. She was starting to go through menopause and noticed some unusual things with her cycle. With being perimenopausal, she should have been seeing less fertile signs, but instead, she was seeing some extremely fertile signs. She went to the doctor and was checked for cervical cancer (they checked her cervix because this is where the woman's mucus is made and mucus is one sign of fertility). The first time she was checked, the cancer test came back negative, yet this woman still felt like something was wrong. She went back to her doctor and she asked him where he took the swab from to check for cancer and he indicated it was from the lower part of her cervix. With her knowledge of NFP, she asked him to check again, but to take the swab from the upper part of the cervix. The doctor did that. Later, when she got the results back, she did actually have cervical cancer. Now, if she would not have been her own advocate, knew how her body worked, and was paying attention to her signs, she would have never known she had cancer. Crazy, right? Team Work My husband and I work together as a team. When it comes to our fertility and planning our family, that responsibility does not just fall on me and what I’ve discerned within prayer. We are working together and communicating constantly about what is going on with my body during the different times of the month. We are praying about our family and what the Lord wants for us. Identify Emotions and Feelings that Go Along with Hormones It is helpful to know my body and how my hormones are working because then my husband can deal with my wide range of emotions a little better. Depending on the time of the month, I can be extremely irritated or lovey-dovey and that all has to do with the change in my hormones. Charting has allowed me to have more control over my emotions and feelings as well. Now since I know what to expect at the different times of my cycle, I’m more prepared. Communication Communication is huge in life, especially married life. When my husband and I are talking about our family and what our future looks like in regards to the choices we make using fertile or infertile time, all other aspects of our marriage (financial, emotional, spiritual) seem to be easier to talk about. We reveal more to each other. We collaborate. Our selfishness diminishes and we look out for the other person more. We grow in virtue, especially in times of abstinence. Open to Life and Love It allows us to be completely open to life and love. We work at winning each other's heart every day. My husband likes to say he's always trying to get his master's degree in Ann, which means he's always figuring out how to please me and understand how I think. I value this since it shows me how much he cares about my well-being. Allows for Responsible Parenthood Being open and honest with each other is a must. With NFP, you are inclined to do this since every month there is a chance of becoming pregnant and welcoming a new baby within nine months. Being responsible parents is important and NFP allows us to do that. In Line with the Church’s Teachings Lastly, NFP falls in line with the Catholic Church's teaching on family planning. This is important to us. We never shut God out of the picture. He gives us life and helps us value each one of my cycles. Every month we prayerfully discern what He's asking of us and how he's guiding us for our future family. We are thankful for NFP and all that it has brought to our married lives. There are times when NFP can be challenging. Yet through this challenge, a couple grows in virtue. Being love-giving and life-giving allows for freedom. It allows for a couple to grow in virtue and their love for each other and the Lord. What benefits of NFP have you seen in your own life and marriage? [bctt tweet="Why I Don't Use Contraception (and the Benefits of NFP) #BISblog //" via="no"] Ann Marschel is a licensed teacher who is currently a stay-at-home mom. She loves to be with her family, go on walks, spend time in nature talking with Jesus, and teaching the Billings Ovulation Method (NFP). You can find out more about her here.

Saying yes to God’s will when your heart says no is one of the hardest things to do in life. Whether it’s a relationship, career, or life ambition, sometimes God’s plans for us are different than we imagine. Sometimes God asks us to let go and trust Him so He can give us something better. I personally experienced this a while back when I went through a difficult breakup with a man I could see my future with. I didn’t understand it and I was upset, confused, and heartbroken. The pain I felt made it so easy to question God’s plan and ask why. What we had was good, so it didn’t make sense to me. Peace in the Midst of Sorrow However, even amidst my immense sorrow and confusion, I had this strange sense of peace I knew was only from Christ. In time, I saw how God needed to work on our hearts. But I couldn’t see it in the moment. The Lord was trying to pull us into a period of growth, and naturally we were going to experience growing pains. During any transition period when Christ calls you out of one point of life into another, it’s going to hurt. There’s going to be pain. But He wants to use the cross to draw you closer to Him. By recognizing your hurt, by recognizing your cross and carrying it strong, you can receive incredible graces to make you into the saint God wants you to be. Just Say Yes While I was going through my difficult time, I was talking with a close friend of mine. She told me how proud of us she was for listening to God’s voice and being obedient to His will in our relationship. I hadn’t really thought about it from the standpoint of obedience before. But I realized that’s why I was able to find peace in such a hard time in my life. Knowing thatches was God's will is what gave me the peace. I didn’t need to understand everything because I knew He did. If it was part of His plan, there was no need to worry because He had my back. I just needed to keep being obedient. The following quote sums it all up pretty well: Obedience unites us so closely to God that it transforms us into Him, so that we have no other will but His. If obedience is lacking, even prayer cannot be pleasing to God. -St. Thomas Aquinas If we say we want God’s will for our lives, but then don’t obey, what’s the point? If we truly want Him to transform us into the saints we can be, then we must go where Christ leads us. But how in the world do we do this if we don’t know where He’s leading us? It starts with being open, listening well, and then saying yes! [bctt tweet="If we truly want Him to transform us into the saints we can be, then we must go where Christ leads us #BISblog //" via="no"] Opening Your Heart to God's Will In order to be obedient to God, we must first be open to hearing His voice and following His will for us. That means inviting Him into all of our relationships, all of our plans, and all of our dreams. If we don’t invite God into all areas of our life, we will just be following our own will and not His. In order to truly allow Christ to transform our lives, we must not be afraid to let Him in and constantly ask for His guidance. I know it’s scary because we wonder, “Well what if He doesn’t want what I do?” I’ve realized that, ultimately, what He has planned for me is far better than anything I could plan myself. So if I want to be truly happy in my relationships, career, or vocation, I know I have to invite God in. And after we invite Him in, we just need to listen. Listening Well Sometimes it’s really hard to hear Him. But the tools that help us hear His voice better are prayer and the Sacraments. Whatever your situation is, simply asking God to show you the way and praying for His will in your life will make things so much clearer. If you’re praying about something and the situation brings you lasting peace, it’s probably from God. On the other hand, if something isn’t bringing you peace, but rather uneasiness or turmoil, maybe it’s time to let go. Even if your heart is saying no. Don’t be fooled though, being obedient to God when your heart and emotions are saying otherwise doesn’t happen overnight. But the more we pursue Christ in prayer and the Sacraments, the more graces we receive to have the courage to let go. We learn to abandon our own emotions and desires to Christ because we realize He knows best. And after that, we just have to say yes. The Daily Yes When I hear the words, “Just say yes,” for some reason a marriage proposal jumps into my head. But in actuality, there are similarities between the “yes” a husband and wife make in the Sacrament of Marriage and the “yes” Christ calls us to daily. When you say yes in the Sacrament of Marriage, you vow to commit to that person forever, no matter what. Every day, whether you wake up joyful or angry with that person, your vocation calls you to die to yourself and say yes. So that’s what you must do! Being Obedient is Part of Our Vocation Similarly, the Lord calls us all to be saints. Regardless of whether we are called to married, religious, or single life, sainthood is and always will be our primary vocation. And that also entails a yes. But a yes to Christ. A yes to His will. A Yes to His plans for us, whether we agree with them or not. As Christians, we were baptized and born into a new life with Christ. Therefore, we are called to be obedient to our Catholic faith, to Christ embodied in the Church. We are called to listen to the voice of God in our lives and follow. So my challenge for you is this: Let God into all areas of your life. Listen for His quiet voice. Ask Him to reveal to you the things you need to let go. And lastly, I challenge you to say yes to God daily, and don’t ever stop! Whatever happens, wherever you feel the Lord calling you, whether it’s what you want or not, just be obedient. You won’t regret it. He has a wonderful story planned for you, and it’s way better than that relationship, career, or life goal you thought you wanted. When in your life have you been obedient to God even when you didn't feel like it? Let's share stories and encourage one another in the comments! [bctt tweet="Being Obedient to God's Will Even When You Don't Like It #BISblog //" via="no"] Josie Kuhlman is a recent college graduate from the University of Florida where she competed on the women’s tennis team for four years. She currently traveling the world and pursuing my dream of playing professional tennis. In her free time, she enjoys spending time with her family in Florida, reading, taking pictures and writing for her blog. Her hope is that her story can inspire others to passionately pursue the true joy found in Christ in their own lives. You can find out more about her here.

Last month, a line in a book I was reading caught my attention. The author was making the claim that true wisdom, Godly wisdom, can only be acquired through worship. I closed the book and reflected on that for a minute; it caught me off guard. When I think of worship, I immediately picture Christian rock concerts or humming along to Matt Maher on the car stereo. I envision swaying in the front pew during Sunday Mass as we sing a favorite hymn. Worship has always been, in my mind, another term for “praising God” and I almost always equate it to music. I asked myself, is that true? Do we acquire wisdom through worship? Wait a second…how do I even define wisdom? I hadn’t really thought about it before. What is Wisdom? After spending some time pondering and reading, I think biblical wisdom can be pretty easily summed up as “knowing and doing God’s will.” When I think of the wisest people I know, faith wise, their lives have the same common thread. They are active seekers of Christ, always longing for more of Him, and striving to discern His will and carry it out in their daily lives. Biblical Wisdom Of course, there are tons of verses throughout the Bible that paint a beautiful picture of what Godly wisdom looks like. Wisdom is humble; the truly wise are marked by their humility. -Proverbs 11:12 Wisdom is peace, mercy, goodness, sincerity. -James 3:17 Wisdom is soothing, calm and collected – not quick to temper or rage. -Proverbs 29:11 Wisdom is pleasantness. -Proverbs 3:18 It’s totally clear: a life characterized by true wisdom is a life marked by peace, joy, humility, and goodness. When I think of women in my life who I would call truly wise, those characteristics come to mind. They seem to float through life. Not naively or immune to the struggles and sorrows. But with the surety that comes from knowing they are beheld by their Creator. They deeply believe in His goodness and promise to see them through. It’s the kind of life–and faith–I want for myself. [bctt tweet="A life characterized by true wisdom is a life marked by peace, joy, humility, and goodness... It’s the kind of life–and faith–I want for myself. #BISblog //" via="no"] What is Worship? When I read that line in the book, it felt too easy. I can get true wisdom, this seemingly elusive but super important virtue, through worship? Play enough K-Love Radio and it will make me wise? Of course, it’s not as simple as that, and requires us to dig deep into what it means to truly worship our God. Worship is, according to Webster, to honor with extravagant love and extreme submission. True worship is a life of holiness that stems from a heart overflowing with love of God. It is not centered on honoring God for what He does, but who He is. True worship is the act of laying down our plans, desires, and will at the foot of the Cross and desiring only what God wants. And when we adopt this posture of true worship that seeks to honor with extravagant love and extreme submission, we begin to develop true wisdom. That is, the ability to know and do God’s will. The more we revere, honor, and adore God, the more we understand who He is. The more we understand who He is, the more we can hear Him speak in our life and can heed His call. [bctt tweet="True worship is a life of holiness that stems from a heart overflowing with love of God. #BISblog //" via="no"] Three Ways to Acquire Wisdom Through Worship Suddenly it feels like I have such a long, long way to go in truly worshipping God. Let alone acquiring wisdom through it. God meets us where we are, though, of this we can rest assured. And even the smallest start is just that:a start. If you’re wanting to start a habit of worship that leads to wisdom, here are my top three tips. 1. Reflect on the characteristics of God. I find that when I’m focused on who God is instead of what He does (or in my limited view, appears to not do), my worship is much deeper. Some of the characteristics you might meditate on are: God is infinite, God is immutable (unchanging), God is omnipotent (all-powerful), God is omniscient (all-knowing), God is omnipresent (He is everywhere), God is good, God is just, God is merciful, God is faithful. 2. Give thanks for things outside of your petitions. I find that when I go to give thanks or write in my gratitude journal, I tend to focus first on answered prayers. I treat it kind of like a checklist for my list of petitions. “Did God answer this one? Hooray, I’m so grateful! Jot that down.” That’s not a bad thing at all. But it tends to keep me focused on the tally of things God has done or not done for me, rather than truly adoring Him regardless of what prayers He’s answered. It keeps my worship self-focused rather than focused on God Himself. When I work to notice and give thanks for other things, like the light through the trees while I’m on a walk with my kids, or the way the fog lingers over the field, or the hummingbirds gathered around a flower in the yard, I’m often able to honor and adore God in a deeper way than when I’m only reflecting on my petitions and prayer requests. Suddenly I have eyes to see all the good that exists just because. Not because I asked for it, but simply because God in His goodness wants us to be blessed. 3. Practice being in God’s presence. A mindful practice of entering into God’s presence will help you adopt an attitude of reverence and adoration. Maybe it’s a Holy Hour in the Adoration chapel, a Rosary on the commute to work, or simply sitting in silence for a few minutes during naptime. I find that when I truly silence the distractions and give myself wholly to the Lord, for whatever length of time, I am awed with love of Him. A daily practice of entering mind and spirit into God’s presence is an amazing way to create a rhythm of worship that leads to wisdom. How do you cultivate an attitude of true worship in your life? How has God-centered worship lead you closer to wisdom? We’d love to hear your tips as we walk this road together! [bctt tweet="Worship as a Means to Acquiring Wisdom #BISblog //" via="no"] HIS WORD CHANGES LIVES God is speaking to you through His Word. In this personal study, you will learn to hear God's voice by reading slowly and praying deeply. BEGIN THE JOURNEY

It’s no secret that our church is in the midst of troubled times. As the initial waves of grief, rage, sorrow, and more with the revelation of the sexual abuse crisis have passed, painful feelings linger. Some of us are still wondering where to turn, how to relate to the Church, and how to draw closer to Christ when our trust has been so betrayed. This post is not about the larger, institutional changes that may need to be considered. But it does concern something that can cause dramatic transformation. Simple Enough for a Child I first came across Pope St. John XXIII's Daily Decalogue in a children’s book at my local library (and not even in the religion section!). The book, Just for Today, illustrates close adaptations of the ten resolutions the Saint tried to live each day. Ten may seem like a lot of things to add to your to-do list, but they are not so much “things to do” as gentle, albeit powerful, modifications to your perspective. The Daily Decalogue What strikes me again and again is how simple these resolutions are, and yet how far off I seem to be from some of them. The effect is almost like the Ten Commandments meets an Examination of Conscience, with a modern sensibility. I want to do them all at once, but even the first seems it will take a good deal of work. Only for today, I will seek to live the livelong day positively without wishing to solve the problems of my life all at once. Easier said than done, of course. But what a worthwhile endeavor to pursue, and how beautifully put. What if I did slow down and focus on the good that is in front of me? What if I didn’t worry about what may or may not come down the pipeline for me? I could live more simply, with more love, greater patience, and firmer trust. The list goes on, touching on the most essential things we do each day and suggesting a way to sanctify them, to make the previously mediocre moments of our days into something holy. Here’s the rest of the list: Only for today, I will seek to live the livelong day positively without wishing to solve the problems of my life all at once. Only for today, I will take the greatest care of my appearance: I will dress modestly; I will not raise my voice; I will be courteous in my behaviour; I will not criticize anyone; I will not claim to improve or to discipline anyone except myself. Only for today, I will be happy in the certainty that I was created to be happy, not only in the other world but also in this one. Only for today, I will adapt to circumstances, without requiring all circumstances to be adapted to my own wishes. Only for today, I will devote 10 minutes of my time to some good reading, remembering that just as food is necessary to the life of the body, so good reading is necessary to the life of the soul. Only for today, I will do one good deed and not tell anyone about it. Only for today, I will do at least one thing I do not like doing; and if my feelings are hurt, I will make sure that no one notices. Only for today, I will make a plan for myself: I may not follow it to the letter, but I will make it. And I will be on guard against two evils: hastiness and indecision. Only for today, I will firmly believe, despite appearances, that the good Providence of God cares for me as no one else who exists in this world. Only for today, I will have no fears. In particular, I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful and to believe in goodness. Indeed, for 12 hours I can certainly do what might cause me consternation were I to believe I had to do it all my life. Simple Wisdom There is so much wisdom in these simple words. Any one of these, when strived for, would effect a drastic change in one’s life, and usher in a closer relationship with Jesus. Taken together, they are a formula to achieve that universal call to holiness that came of Vatican II, which Pope St. John XXIII called together. In fact, his feast day is the anniversary of the opening of the Council, rather than that of the day he died. Put It to the Test My memory isn’t so great that I can remember ten things at once, in addition to all the details of my life. But I can do one thing at a time. I can pick one resolution a week and copy it down, put it somewhere I can see it regularly. Rereading it over and over, I can commit it to memory. I can put it into practice. I can teach my children and encourage my friends to do the same. Like so many people, I struggle with family, work, friendships, and life in general pulling me in a million directions. There are temptations every step of the way. I know I want Christ as my center, but I falter. I fall away; and I get back up and try again. In order to make that trying again really fruitful, I first need to understand who I am as a human. I need to recognize my weaknesses, in order to lean on Christ when I encounter situations that challenge me. This Decalogue is like a training plan, a strengthening project to help me persevere when obstacles to holy living come my way (which is basically every day, right?). God Wants Good Things for Us Pope St. John XXIII said that, “Every believer in this world must be a spark of light, a core of love, life-giving leaven in the mass: and the more he is so, the more he will live, in his innermost depths, in communion with God." This is God’s desire for us: to love him completely and to rejoice in that love. Which of these resolutions speaks to you most directly? How can you put it into practice today and how can you encourage someone in your life to do the same? [bctt tweet="Only for Today: The Daily Decalogue of Pope St. John XXIII #BISblog //" via="no"] Lindsay Schlegel is a daughter of God who seeks to encourage, inspire, and lift up the contemporary woman to be all she was created to be. She's the author of Don't Forget to Say Thank You: And Other Parenting Lessons That Brought Me Closer to God, as well as shorter nonfiction and fiction pieces, both online and in print. With joy, she speaks about recognizing God's voice and living the truth therein. Lindsay lives in New Jersey with her high-school-sweetheart-turned-husband and their kids. You can find out more about her here. This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase by clicking through one of these links, Blessed is She will receive a small percentage of your purchase at no additional cost to you. Thank you for supporting this ministry by using our affiliate links! Pssst, if you want a great reminder of this prayer, get the sticker!

How long, O Lord, must your people suffer? How far can a Church bend before it breaks? How much more can we take? I am angry at the men who have made my job as a Theology teacher and my life as a Catholic so much more incredibly difficult. Who can really blame those who choose to walk away? It often feels like that would be easier. I would spend less time defending Your Bride and more time just with You. And then I come before you in the Blessed Sacrament. And I see You like this, radiant and arms outstretched, As if to embrace me as I cry out to You. And then I receive You on my tongue, and You dwell in me, And I am sustained. And then I think of the good priests I’ve known and encountered. The ones who were vessels of mercy in the moments when I felt the most unforgivable, The ones who reaffirmed Your love for me in the moments when I felt utterly unlovable, The ones who told me to pray for my enemies when I wanted to choose hate And to pray for my loved ones when I didn’t want to love them, The ones who spoke truth to me when I was so convinced of society’s lies, The ones who have given up their lives and possessions, their vanity and pride, Just to be the shepherd of wandering sheep like me. I believe in the priesthood still, Even at times like this when I really don’t feel like it, When I don’t want to, When it would be easier not to. In the midst of confusion and trial, Of abuse and utter heinous sin, You are still good. You are still God. You are so much greater than humanity’s twisted minds and susceptible hearts. Those in the Church have failed us, But the Church can never fail us. Those in the Church are not immune to Satan’s influence. To evil. Satan works from the inside out, From inside the walls we assume keep evil out. So much needs to be done still. So much needs to happen. And I grow tired of waiting. But I will still come here and sit with You And gaze at You as You gaze at me. I will still show up on Sunday even when I am unconvinced, or tired, or angry. Where else could I go? You have the words of everlasting life. In the stillness, I hear Him say to me: My heart is bleeding with yours. My eyes are wet with tears. I have cried and cried for my people, For the misuse and abuse of the gift of free will, For the sickness and contortion of the mind and soul, For my beloved wounded sons and daughters. I will wrap the world in my embrace and heal it, If only she wants to be healed. A mother cannot clean the wound of a child that will not be still and allow the healing to begin. A father cannot comfort the heartbreak of his daughter if she will not open the door when he knocks. Just be still now, and I will do the rest. -A Catholic School Teacher's Response to the Catholic Clergy Abuse, by Jenna Violi Reflect Trials and tribulations offer us a chance to make reparation for our past faults and sins. On such occasions the Lord comes to us like a physician to heal the wounds left by our sins. Tribulation is the divine medicine. St. Augustine [bctt tweet="Tribulation is the divine medicine.. -St. Augustine #BISblog #BISrests //" via="no"] Listen For musical inspiration for your restful Sunday, listen to our BIS Rests playlist. [bctt tweet="BIS Rests: Teach + Lament #BISblog #BISrests //"] Original poem by Jenna Violi. She is a Theology teacher and retreat coordinator at a Catholic school in suburban Philadelphia. She spends her free time singing at Mass, writing music, teaching herself guitar, drinking coffee, and looking at pictures of corgis. You can find out more about her here.

It was a perfect day. Pleasantly warm. Bright sun. Subtle breeze. Funerals rarely end up on dreary, rainy days like they do in the movies. I walked toward the church, took a deep breath, opened the door, and walked inside. Immediately I was met by the loud din. People were everywhere, talking and laughing. My grieving soul was bewildered. Did I walk into the wrong church? My friend had died just a few days ago. Taken so young. I had watched her battle the brain tumor, and I had come to see her commended to God. My purpose was to attend her funeral, not mingle at an afternoon get-together. I hurried through the crowd, went into the sanctuary, and sat down heavily in a pew. I sighed. Silence. A time to mourn, and a time to dance... (Ecclesiastes 3:4) I walked into a celebration of life. It is a trend in Catholic funerals these days. We celebrate the amazing actions and virtues of our deceased loved ones, and rejoice in now having an angel in Heaven. I have heard this sentiment many times. As comforting as it is to visualize our loved one as an angel in Heaven, there actually are two concerns here: 1. We don’t become angels. We are humans, which means we do not become angels when we get to Heaven. That would be a terrible tragedy, since angels are pure spirits, and we both spirit and body. If we became angels, we could not be reunited with our bodies at the end of time when our bodies are resurrected. We are incredibly blessed and unique from the angels because we are both spirit and flesh. Like Jesus. Let’s not throw that reality away. 2. We might not go straight to Heaven. We often see the misconception that our loved ones go straight to Heaven. There are amazingly holy people who die and do go directly to Heaven. But that is because they let God work so completely and utterly in their lives that they are wholly purified and ready for the Beatific Vision. For those of us who need more purification and unification to Christ, we have the gift of Purgatory. All who enter Purgatory are assured of eternal salvation in Heaven, but still have certain imperfections and attachments, whether to people, possessions, position, or other worldly things. These separate us from God and prevent us from experiencing the complete and utter joy God plans for us in Heaven (see CCC 1030-1032). Yes, we have an obligation to ourselves and our loves ones to properly mourn and heal. One way that we do that is to share memories, laugh and cry over old photographs and videos, and celebrate the incredible blessing this person was in our lives. But we are called to do much more than celebrate the lives our loved ones lived on earth. Why Do We Pray for the Dead? We pray for the dead because we want to help our loved ones get to Heaven. Many of our loved ones go to Purgatory to fully prepare us for Heaven. But since Purgatory is a time of purification and cleansing from our earthly attachments, it is probably not an enjoyable place. We often refer to the suffering of Purgatory, as even though there is a joyful hope of reaching Heaven, the poor souls there still feel the acute pain of their separation from God. Our prayers can help shorten their time in Purgatory. Our prayers can more quickly bring them to the eternal embrace of God in Heaven. How beautiful! That is why we pray for the dead. God, in His infinite goodness, wants us to participate in others’ salvation. He doesn’t need us to, but He loves us so much that He wants to collaborate with us on the path to Heaven. Therefore he made atonement for the dead, so that they might be delivered from their sin. -2 Maccabees 12:45b I Want People to Pray for Me... I have told my husband multiple times that at my funeral, I want everyone on their knees, begging God to open the gates of Heaven for me. As a child, I asked God to let me have my Purgatory here on earth. I know I am experiencing that suffering to a certain degree. But I also know there is still a lot of work to be done on my soul, so I will likely spend time in Purgatory. But my friends and family can help me on that journey with their prayers. So when I die, you can celebrate me later. Please first pray for the repose of my soul. Pray that I get to Heaven to be with my Beloved forever. How Can We Pray for the Dead? Helping our loved ones get to Heaven is a beautiful task. Here are just a few ways you can pray for the dead. Anointing of the Sick. So much grace, forgiveness, and even healing, can come from receiving this sacrament. If a loved one is nearing death, or even undergoing a serious procedure, consider asking a priest to come administer last rites. If someone dies without receiving this sacrament, you can still ask a priest to administer it. Funeral Mass. The funeral Mass comforts family and friends and formally commends the soul of our loved one to God. Graces will abound. All Souls’ Day. On November 2, we remember everyone who has died. It is a tradition in the Catholic Church to visit a cemetery on that day. It is even possible to receive an indulgence for souls in Purgatory by doing so. (An indulgence removes some or all of the time spent in Purgatory. In order to receive the indulgence, you are asked to be detached from sin, go to Confession, receive Holy Communion, and pray for the pope.) Mass. You may recall hearing intentions at Mass for people who have died, ether before Mass begins or during the intercessions. This is a great way to receive prayers for your loved one from your parish community. Light a Candle. Most Catholic churches have shrines of Mary, Jesus, and the Saints with candles you can light. This is a beautiful way to ask for their intercession for your loved one. Pray the Rosary. The Rosary is one of the most powerful prayers available to us. It is particularly powerful in praying for the dead. Each Hail Mary even ends with asking for grace in death: “pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.” Anniversary. You can make a special effort to pray for your loved one on the anniversary of his or her death. You could visit the grave and offer special prayers on that day. Offer it Up. Our days are filled many little trials and sufferings. We can offer these pains for our loved ones. When something happens, we can say something like, “Jesus, I offer You this pain for this person.” Pictures. Keep photographs of your deceased loved ones in your home. Every time you see them, offer a quick prayer for them. Entrust the Dead to God's Mercy Our God is an incredibly merciful and loving God. He longs to be with each of us. He welcomes our prayers for the dead, and He will certainly reward them. [bctt tweet="The Importance of Praying for the Dead #BISblog //" via="no"] Jennifer Miller is a wife, mother, writer, and lover of all things Catholic. She has been blessed to work in Catholic media and publishing since 2012, including roles at Our Sunday Visitor and Dynamic Catholic, where she led the development and execution of Best Advent Ever and Best Lent Ever (which have reached more than 1 million people). She also blogs regularly for the Ten Ten Group. When she's not writing and spending time with her family, you can find Jennifer swimming, drinking bourbon, or offering constructive criticism on any ad she sees. You can learn more about her here.