In Catholic circles, the word "discernment" is often thrown around. And with good reason. Making decisions prayerfully and intentionally is one of the best ways we can honor God by our actions. And it remains one of the trickiest processes to define. What is discernment? How do I know if I’m making a discerning choice? Can I discern more than just my vocation? Must I? How do I discern major decisions with someone else? Discernment Begins with Trust Too often, I find that people with the best of intentions go about the work of discerning as though their lives depend on it (and it can absolutely feel that way!). However, I would encourage us to remember that it is the God of the universe with Whom we make decisions. To imagine that God can only work with the most agreeable and convenient of circumstances is to disregard the very nature of Whom God has consistently shown us to be throughout human history. For I know well the plans I have in mind for you—says the LORD—plans for your welfare and not for woe, so as to give you a future of hope. // Jeremiah 29:11 Thank God the Spirit isn’t limited by our imperfect understanding or lack of cooperation! How to Navigate Discernment as a Team I will not claim to have any particular expertise on the matter of discernment. But I have worked with spiritual directors for years, been married for more than a decade, moved cross-country (twice), and have spent years working with young adults trying to decide what’s next. I have learned over and again five consistent tools that make the process of discerning God’s will in my own life feel more tangible. Adding another person/group to the process certainly requires more conversation, but can look much the same. These are important questions and points to consider in discernment as a team. 1. Identify what is at stake. What is prompting the question at this time? This could mean anything, including: loss of income, desire to more faithfully follow God, dissatisfaction with current circumstances, invitation to something more exciting, and so on. Next, identify the risks of following through (or not). 2. Take these risks to prayer. Sometimes our desire not to change can pose as great a risk to our well-being as a giant leap of faith! Tell Jesus about your motivations, excitement, anxiety, and circumstances that have prompted you to come to this metaphorical crossroads. This can be done in a journal, in Adoration, or in your pajamas before bed. The essential piece is naming the desires of your heart before the Lord and being attentive to the response you receive. Very often you will experience peace and consolation, or the awareness of desolation at which point you will understand that “no” or “not yet” is the response to the change proposed. 3. Mention your plans to those who know you best. Obviously, if you are making a major life decision, you are going to include your significant other/fiancé/spouse/family. Beyond the basic details, mention your hopes, questions, and the deepest desires of your heart to your best friend, a parent, sibling, or spiritual director. Their response to our efforts can be especially enlightening. Are they delighted by your idea? Inspired and encouraging to proceed? Or are they confused, concerned, or discouraging of your venture? At the end of the day, they alone do not get final say in the decision (although their role in your life will carry varying weight of opinion and influence). But their read on who and how we are in the world, not to mention their desire for our well-being, is generally spot on. We are wise to pay attention. 4. Sit with it both ways. Allow yourself some time to sit with both outcomes. For a day or a week, allow yourself the idea of taking the job—how does that feel? For another day or a week, allow yourself the idea of not taking the job. How do you feel about that decision? Ask yourself which scenario brings greater peace. In discernment as a team, invite the other into this practice. 5. Compare notes. Lastly, come back to a place of honest conversation with one another. What are the gifts/challenges you foresee in either outcome? What consolation/desolation did you experience in prayer? What input did those closest to you have to offer? Finally, consider what is being asked of you personally. Courage? Patience? Trust? Compromise? Self-control? Prudence? Self-care? Moving forward Whether at this point you know with certainty, or whether moving forward with a decision at this point feels like an act of faith, you can trust that you have prayerfully and intentionally weighed your options and are capable of making a decision. “God draws straight with crooked lines,” is a phrase I re-visit often when I put mounting pressure on the outcome of a decision that I am ultimately putting in God’s hands. Trust in God’s goodness and regular practice of working "for the good of those who love Him" (Romans 8:28). Let's close, then, with a prayer for times of discernment: My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that, if I do this, You will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. // Thomas Merton   [bctt tweet="Discernment as a Team #BISblog //" via="no"]

The other day, my daughter and I were having a conversation about Heaven. She thought that everybody in Heaven were “grandmas and grandpas”, innocently assuming that people only ever died of old age. I reminded her that people pass away at all different ages, including her little brother who was not even born when he passed from this life. The thing about death is that it can happen to anyone at any time and can even feel random or unfair. As believers, we know that God is the Author of life, and that even though death may not make sense to us at the time, we have confidence that God has his reasons for allowing it. But does that ease our grief? There is No Heartbeat I’ll never forget that moment when I looked up at the ultrasound machine and there was a deafening silence. The ultrasound tech couldn’t say much, but I already knew. We lost our baby. It’s hard to say what I was feeling at that moment, but a few days later, I was overcome with guilt and anger. I wondered why God would take away something so special. I wondered if He had done it because it was an unexpected pregnancy and I was initially regretful about having another baby so soon after my first. I wished I could go back in time and not waste any second feeling worried or anxious. I felt like I deserved my miscarriage because I was so selfish and unwilling to trust God with my body and with my family. I know what I was feeling was grief, and some days I was sick to my stomach with it. Other days, I just felt nothing. It was a bitter emptiness caused by an empty womb and an empty heart. A Word from Saint Zelie Around this time, I started to read more about an amazing and quite ordinary saint named Zelie Martin. She was a wife and mother to some incredible children (including Saint Therese of Lisieux), but she also experienced the excruciating loss of four out of her nine children. I couldn’t begin to imagine her pain and grief until I read some of her letters. I knew Saint Zelie was reaching out to me in those moments of grief to give me glimpses of hope and to guide me through the grieving process she had been through so many times. She had, what I believe, a gift from the Holy Spirit to gain beautiful insight into her vocation as a mother and the deaths of her children. When I close the eyes of my dear little children and when I buried them, I felt great pain, but it was always with resignation ... I don’t think the sorrows and problems could be weighed against the eternal happiness of my children. So they weren’t lost forever. We’ll see them again in Heaven. // Saint Zelie Martin, Letter 72 Finding Hope Despite our sadness, my husband and I wanted our baby’s presence to be known. We knew that he had a special purpose, despite his short life on Earth, and we had to give him a name, an identity, and a special place in our family. We named him Francis Nathan and we made it a habit to ask for his prayers every day. As time went on, my grief certainly didn’t just go away, but I was able to find a lot of healing and blessing at the thought of Him being perfectly content and fulfilled in the next life. What a blessing it is to know that from the moment of conception, my son was as physically close to me as he could possibly be. What a blessing the Church gives us in the reasonable hope that we will once again see our babies when we, by God's grace, experience the Beatific Vision! Finding Joy Again Whether you experience the loss of a child, a parent, or a friend, I pray that you are okay with feeling grief. It is a completely natural and normal part of the healing process, and grief can look like something else entirely from one person to another. But I also pray that you don’t suffer in silence. Don’t believe for a second that your grief doesn’t matter or that others will find it too difficult to listen. Whether it’s through conversation, or writing, or creating art—whatever it is, tell your story. I pray that you find consolation from your friends and loved ones, I pray that you are able to mourn through this emotional process with someone you trust. I hope that we can honor the people we have lost because they deserve to be known. I’ll never forget the moment when someone reached out to me online and asked if it would be okay for her to ask our little baby for his prayers. It was a moment of absolute pride and joy. What an honor to be asked such a thing on behalf of my son. It clicked for me then, that while I was grieving, I also had an opportunity to rejoice. The Body of Christ Jesus reminds me that it is okay to grieve—that it is possible to grieve and have faith at the same time. He Himself grieved when Lazarus died. But He also raised Lazarus from the dead and showed us that joy can come from suffering, just as redemption came from His crucifixion and Death. He reminds us that He loves us more than we can imagine and wants nothing more than to be with us for eternity. One of the greatest joys of being Catholic is knowing that there are a Communion of Saints who are cheering us on. I know that my son is not alone. He was never alone when he was with me in my womb, and he will never be alone now. When is a time in your life when you felt sadness and grief? What was your mourning process like? How has your faith helped you during that time?   [bctt tweet="How to Have Faith in the Midst of Grief #BISblog //" via="no"]

I rise early after only snoozing my alarm once. I creep past my children's bedrooms as they slumber. I start the coffee. I light the candle. I sit down in my prayer spot and grab my Bible. I take a deep breath, rub my eyes, and settle in to pray. And then, I run through the list. Round and round my mind swirls, considering my to-do list that needs organizing, decisions that need discernment, friends that need intercession, appointments and meetings that need scheduled, texts that need to be sent. My intended moment of prayer passes before I realize. Did I even talk to God? Moving from the Cycle of Distraction . . . When my typically fruitful prayer time morphs into this spinning cycle of consideration, I know it's time to zero in. Sometimes I want to bring so much before the Lord that I end up bringing nothing. And really, He just wants my heart. During these times I double down on my need for concentrated meditation. But too much input can aggravate the distracted pace which my mind is already running. So I choose one thing: one devotional, one book of the Bible, one Gospel for lectio divina, or one theme in prayer. And I allow that to be my focus. I entrust the rest to Jesus. . . . to a Resting Place of Praise Something tells me that, after the last couple of years, I am not the only one who experiences distracted prayer time. There's so much to grieve, to hope for, to confess, to forgive, to question, to sacrifice for, and to ponder. Maybe you feel like your prayer time has turned into "to-do list" time, too. Maybe the silence in which you normally flower with Jesus is now so polluted with noise and distress and nothing is growing. In these cases, I have found that setting my mind upon a singular theme in prayer has provided the kind of spiritual nutrients the soil of my heart needs. It allows me to shift my focus from seeking earthly solutions to giving heavenly praise. Instead of beginning my days in stress, I begin them in stillness. And all the other things I'm worried or thinking about? They become clearer once I have a focused moment with Him. [elementor-template id="495700"] Look to the Life of Our Lord When it comes to zeroing in on a specific prayer practice, I like to turn to the Gospels. I find that meditating on a certain moment in the life of Our Lord offers me endless inspiration and food for thought. It helps me focus on what matters most. I can see more clearly the answer to all my questions: Jesus Himself. This type of contemplation of the life of Christ draws me to worship Him, the only posture that truly brings me peace. With this in mind, then, I am eager to refocus my prayer once again this upcoming Advent season. And Hay Became Holy This year's Advent devotional from Blessed is She is called And Hay Became Holy. The focus is singular: the nativity of Christ. At a time when many of us are facing distracted and disjointed prayer, this devotional gives us an opportunity to get small, to be quiet, and to focus on the Baby in the manger. An Advent-Slow Pace During each of the four weeks of Advent, we will spend slow time with a different character in the creche scene. Moving from lowest position to the highest, we will contemplate the Newborn King with: The ox and donkey The shepherds and angels The Magi The Holy Family We will pray through what each character signifies according to Church tradition and what that means for where we are in our walk with Jesus. Whether you feel closest to the donkey or Mother Mary, this devotional will show you that you have a place in the stable right beside the Savior. To Hold and to Have This year's Catholic Advent devotional is unique in that it incorporates visio divina with sacred art. These images prompt our prayer and guide our meditation. On Sundays, we are encouraged to keep something from Mass as a reminder of our communal worship: a clip from the song sheet, a flower from outside the church, a quote from the readings or homily. Having something to hold and art to observe engages our senses, helping to remedy the problem of distracted prayer. Then, we move into the rest of the week. On Mondays, I help lead us into the week with a reflection on the character we are worshipping alongside. On Tuesdays and Thursdays we will sit with Scripture and allow our minds to consider only that verse. We offer you some questions for thought, too, to help direct your mind to the singular focus. On Wednesdays and Fridays, you will hear stories from Sarah Rose, Gina Fensterer, Leana Bowler, and Bobbi Rol that invite you to consider your own story. Finally, Saturdays allow us to focus on domestic worship by praying with the Psalms. "Zeroing In" on the Newborn King This Advent, I am excited and thankful to be simplifying my prayer with And Hay Became Holy. I'm ready to turn my attention, my mind, and my heart from a swirl of thoughts and questions to the One Who fulfills them all. Would you be willing to pray with me through this devotional? Let me know how you'll be praying: And Hay Became Holy And Hay Became Holy for Kids (or the adult + kid bundle) The Advent Bundle with And Hay Became Holy, a Rosary, and mug And Hay Became Holy + Emmanuel for the Christmas season I pray this Advent devotional helps zero in your prayer so that the Lord bears the most beautiful fruit during this season!   [bctt tweet="The Importance of "Zeroing In" in Prayer #BISblog #BISadvent //" via="no"]

October brims with the anticipation of all that fall brings. Nature begins to point us towards a slower shift in our routine as the leaves change colors, we change out our summer wardrobe for warmer clothes, and we prepare for a new season that will lead us to a new liturgical year. October is filled with wonderful Feast Days but it is also the month of the Rosary. Our Catholic Faith is full of traditions that give us an invitation to go deeper in the ways we live out our prayer filled lives. It is fitting that we have a whole month dedicated to praying and asking Our Blessed Mother to intercede for us before we dive into the busy-ness that November and December can bring. Ways to Honor Our Lady of the Rosary in October If it's been a while since you prayed the Rosary or found joy in praying it, we hope these liturgical ideas will spur some excitement in praying the Rosary with your family and friends. Outside with Mama Mary Enjoy the cooler temperatures without breaking a sweat and bring your Rosary along with you. You can pray as you go for an evening walk with your Rosary in one hand and your water bottle in the other. Kids love to be involved in the Rosary as well. Assign an older child the task of keeping track of the decades. The count does not have to be perfect—saying a few extra Hail Marys is always a good thing! Garden Flowers If you are in a creative mood, cut some flowers and place them in a vase for Our Blessed Mother before you pray the Rosary as a family. Make the month of October a time for your household to honor the Blessed Mother by your flower offering. It doesn’t matter what kind of flowers you have. Just like mothers delight when their children give them flowers off the sidewalk, our Blessed Mother is sure to love the gesture as well. Rosary Walk Find a Rosary garden at a nearby parish. Some parishes have gardens in the shape of a Rosary. Take time out of your day to change scenery by praying a decade or welcome others to pray the whole Rosary with you. Getting out of the house and onto church grounds can help support you in your intention of praying the Rosary. Outdoor Rosary Collect sticks, rocks, and leaves to create your own Rosary outside. Invite Godparents, grandparents, or friends to pray an outdoor Rosary with you. If it’s not a fire hazard, use votive candles as the Our Father beads. An evening Rosary will allow you to enjoy the sunset, candlelight, and cooler outdoor temperatures to pray together. If you have access to a fire pit, make s'mores to end the prayerful evening. Hike Go on a hike and take your beads with you. Experience the beauty of the world while praying the Rosary. Find a shaded spot to say the Hail Holy Queen and set up a picnic to refuel from the hike. Let your body rest and receive from the scenic view that surrounds you. Art Paint a picture that represents Our Blessed Mother. Do you know a friend who is an artist? Grab the necessary supplies and have him/her lead you in a painting of the Immaculate Heart of Mary or a flower that represents Our Blessed Mother. This can be done via Zoom or in-person. Some paint businesses offer the option to paint something besides the paintings that are normally available. Send them the painting you have in mind and see if you can turn it into a BIS night out! Scroll to the plant section of this blog post to give you some flower inspiration! Draw There are so many benefits to drawing and you do not have to be a kid to partake. Draw our Blessed Mother a picture or find one on the Internet to print out and color alongside your children, friends, or family while you pray the Rosary. On the Go Pray the Rosary on the road. Keep a prayer card of Our Blessed Mother with you in the car. When you are dropping off the kids to school, going to the grocery store, Church, the gas station, or the gym, pray a decade from when you leave until you arrive at your destination. Pick up where you left off on the drive to your next errand. By the end of the day you have done a whole Rosary without evening knowing it! Sing Sing hymns to Our Blessed Mother. You don’t have to be a singer to lift up your prayers! Singing is a great way to lift up our hearts and honor Our Blessed Mother. Sing along to these ten Marian hymns. Or listen to the Salve Regina in Gregorian chant as a way to quiet your heart and mind before praying the Rosary. The Ave Maria in Latin is another beautiful song that can accompany the ending of a Rosary as well. Extra Rosaries Do you have too many Rosaries in your house? Give them away to a friend who does not have one. It is easy to assume that every Catholic household is inundated with Rosaries, but reach out to your inner circle and see if anyone needs one or two. The gift of giving someone a Rosary is a grace to the recipient and to you as well. Food It's not a month of liturgical activities without food! Invite your extended family over for a meal and decorate the table with accents that represent Our Blessed Mother. Place a statue of Our Lady at the center of the table and take turns sharing all the ways Our Blessed Mother has interceded for your intentions in your family. Invite grandparents to share their fondness of the Blessed Mother as well. End the evening with a Rosary in thanksgiving for the lovely meal and opportunity to gather together. Learn about a Different Title of Our Blessed Mother Our Blessed Mother has so many titles. Do you know them all? I certainly don’t! This is a good time to research a title of the Blessed Virgin Mary that you aren’t familiar with and share your knowledge with your family. Godparents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles can benefit from what you learn as well. Maybe there is an icon of the Blessed Virgin Mary that has always intrigued you but you have never researched. Include your children and Godchildren and have fun creating a mini-presentation on the chosen title of Our Blessed Mother. Gather with family and share your findings. Make Rosaries Make Rosaries at your local parish and learn how to make them! Join your parish Rosary makers group to learn how to make Rosaries. We don’t always need an exclusive invitation to ministry life if there is something that piques our interest. Learn the Rosary in Latin or another Language Do you have a love for learning different languages? YouTube offers the Rosary in several languages. Maybe you feel most drawn to pray the Rosary in Latin or Spanish. Regardless what language you say it in, Our Blessed Mother hears us and learning a new language offers us an opportunity to lift up our voices in the diversity that makes up the Catholic Church. Consecration Renew your consecration to Our Blessed mother or find out more about it here as well as other books about Mary. Growing in Your Love for Mary and the Rosary There are a variety of ways to incorporate praying the Rosary throughout the month of October. We can use any of these practices long after October and include them in our family life as we see fit. Our Lady of the Rosary, pray for us!   [bctt tweet="Ways to Honor Our Lady in October #BISblog //" via="no"]

My initial reaction to Matthew West’s latest single "Modest is Hottest" was amusement. Although I love his music, I didn’t quite understand why the lyrics needed to carry a legalistic grip to convey the message on modesty. Besides, the word "hot" is burdened with sexual undertones and only serves to objectify women, in a different way. Having served young people for more than a decade now, I can safely say that this pietistic approach to modesty will only escalate shame, seeing our bodies as sources of temptation that must be hidden, rather than what they truly are. Clearly, there is a chasm. Clearly, we are struggling to convey truth in a post-modern, godless culture. How do we celebrate the female body without objectifying women? In the midst of this moral wasteland, how do we practice modesty? The Language Of Clothing I have always loved fashion and have fond childhood memories playing dress up with my sister and admiring my mother’s chic fashion tastes. My journey to modest fashion, however, took on new meaning only after my conversion. I fell away from Faith and chose atheism in high school, when I needed it the most. The turbulence at home, combined with an anemic faith, propelled me to choose "pretty" and "cool" without a moral compass. I slid down the slippery slope of immodesty and promiscuity, and my identity crisis showed up in my clothing. With constant battles that left me feeling undesirable and unlovable, I was dressing for attention and drowning out my pain with addictions. Today, as Christ continues to heal my self-worth, I am able to see gaps that result from a fragmented view of God. My broken lens altered the way I saw my body. Just like other material objects, fashion became an undue attachment to fill a cavernous void within. I was chasing imitation beauty and settling just to "fit in." Pope Pius XII says: Society reveals what it is by the clothes it wears. There is a language of clothing that communicates messages and reveals secret aspirations that can either build or destroy our future. Over the years I have learned to ask: What message does this outfit carry? Why do I want to be validated by the world’s standards? Why don’t I want to be free from vanity, and the all-too-common “look at me!” attitude? Worth, Not Wardrobe For a long time, I saw modesty as a pseudonym for unattractiveness. Following my conversion, I encountered self-appointed modesty police furtively checking what everyone was wearing. Many were women. I remember emptying my entire wardrobe and settling for "traditional" attires lest I looked too "unspiritual." Though Modesty is often presented as adherence to a legalistic set of rules, it is so much more. The Catechism affirms: Modesty protects the intimate center of the person. // CCC 2521 Modesty adorns our bodies in a way that reflects who we really are: living tabernacles and temples of the Holy Spirit. We are the crown of creation. And, we are beloved daughters of the Creator of authentic beauty. All the emphasis on do’s and don’ts can miss a fundamental mark. Modesty is less about an item of clothing than it is about virtue. Our worth does not come from wardrobes, but from God. Our inherent identity in Christ is what gives us dignity and direction and it begins first with our interior self, the inner sanctum of our hearts. Do I see myself as God’s beloved, beautiful and worthy of love? Under pressure how many of us compare ourselves with others and lose touch with who we are? Rather than celebrating our uniqueness, how many of us covet only to lose joy? When we lose our identity, our lifestyle choices are the first to be derailed. Clothing is not meant to be only about us. We could be dressed with the right credentials, covered by the latest fashion and yet be enslaved. If anything, modest clothing should serve as a reminder that we are sacred, that we made for more and that we exist for influence and impact. [bctt tweet="Modesty adorns our bodies in a way that reflects who we really are: living tabernacles and temples of the Holy Spirit. #BISblog //" via="no"] Modesty Inspires True Masculinity Being a long-standing ministry leader, it is no secret that I have had to deal with issues concerning inappropriate clothing. Even today, so many women see dress and devotion as contradictory. As Catholic women, we need to challenge the status quo that portrays a scantily clad, inordinately thin woman as confident. And we need to challenge men to see themselves as reflections of imago dei. The journey to a safer, more whole society requires the morality of both men and women. I have encountered men in ministry who have been won over to faith by the modesty and lifestyles of their girl friends. These women carried an aura of grace that directly pointed to the light within, driving out their darkness and helping their male peers admire and love the female body for its sacredness. They testified of a beauty that was radiating when women carried themselves with a sense of interior peace, confident in who they were and who didn’t need to play up to modern media to demonstrate their worth. A Two-Way-Street of Demand Pope Saint John Paul II rightly declared: Genuine Love is demanding, but its beauty lies precisely in the demands it makes. Far contrary to the culture that asserts that a man’s lust is his problem, it is modesty that saves, sustains, and sanctifies. It is modesty that fosters dignity in the other person. It is modesty that wills the good of the other. It is modesty that inspires true masculinity and it is modesty that produces mature love. A man knows he can take a woman seriously when she isn’t occupied with her body or clamoring for his attention with external adornments. Such humility is powerful. It is freeing. How can we expect anyone to respect us and even love us heroically if we do not offer ourselves the grace and dignity we deserve? Modern Day Influencers But just like faith, style that elevates true femininity is a journey. Fashion will change over time and so will our bodies. We need a vision beyond the here and now. We are made for so much more than attire and adornment. Women have an irreplaceable influence on their cultures and modesty can serve as a soulful endeavor towards sainthood. Why not pick a patron Saint for our next shopping spree? Our Saint sisters want to accompany our journey of beauty. Saint Rose of Lima is a patron of beauty and Saint Margaret of Scotland understood the importance of fashion. A New Witness of Modesty Sisters, we need to rise above the toxicity of this culture that objectifies women. We need to counter the legalistic and lax attitude that measures modesty by the hemline rather than the heart. We need freedom from competition and comparison. We need modern day influencers, who can redefine fashion from a biblical worldview. We need to celebrate our uniqueness and live out our creativity. And we need the diversity of styles in the sisterhood. [bctt tweet="We need to rise above this culture that objectifies women. We need to counter the legalistic and lax attitude that measures modesty by the hemline rather than the heart. We need to redefine fashion from a biblical worldview. #BISblog //" via="no"] Modesty is always going to be challenging in our hyper-sexed world and giving up a lifestyle that brings a sense of belonging will always be painful, but think about incomparable gains. Think about freedom. Think about interior peace. Unlike the catch and costliness of well-marketed fashion, the robes given by Christ are free. How invigorating it is to come to Him without costly costume or pretense. How liberating it is to exchange everything we have collected from this world to cover our self-importance and security for garments of salvation and righteousness. How awe-inspiring that underneath the array of exquisite clothing is a beautiful woman, capable of changing the world.   [bctt tweet="The Heart of Modesty #BISblog //" via="no"]

Your word, O Lord, is truth; consecrate us in the truth. // John 17:17 Love this from today's readings. Let His word dwell in us richly, sisters. Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper

A few years ago, my husband and I approached our Pastor after Mass and asked him to give a blessing over the newly-formed baby growing within me. I was expecting a simple blessing, something like him making the Sign of the Cross over me and saying a couple of quick words. Instead, he brought us to the sacristy and pulled out the Book of Blessings. I didn’t expect him to pray over me with a prayer specifically written for mothers before childbirth. It moved me deeply. The Blessing of Expectant Mothers Before the blessing itself, the priest spoke of how Jesus Himself became human through the Blessed Mother’s womb. He then spoke a few words in preparation saying: The reason for the blessing of a mother-to-be is that she may await her hour of delivery in faith and hope, as the partner of God’s own love, may already cherish with her maternal love the child in her womb. Wow! Awaiting my “hour of delivery in faith and hope”! I did not realize how much I needed that prayer until I heard the words spoken over me. How frequently I fell into doubt and despair, fearing the worst for my child: miscarriage, infant loss, a high-risk pregnancy, etc. But here, in the early weeks of life growing inside of me, I was called out of the temptation to grasp in vain for a “control” that I could never truly attain. The Prayer of Blessing Then, the Prayer of Blessing was prayed over me: Lord God, Creator of the human race, your Son, through the working of the Holy Spirit, was born of a woman, so that he might pay the age-old debt of sin and save us by his redemption. Receive with kindness the prayer of your servant as she asks for the birth of a healthy child. Grant that she may safely deliver a son or a daughter to be numbered among your family, to serve you in all things, and to gain eternal life. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Centered on Salvation In the very first sentence, the life of the Trinity takes center stage, just as it does in our Baptism and in the words of the Apostles' Creed. As it reads in the Catechism, “The faith of all Christians rests on the Trinity...It is therefore the source of all the other mysteries of faith, the light that enlightens them.” It is so fitting that this blessing should include the transformative power of the Sacrament of Baptism, as well as be a reminder of how we are to live out our call baptismal call. Honoring a Mother's Heart Then in the second paragraph the prayer shifts its focus to the mother receiving the blessing, as well as her unborn child. It honors the desire of every mother’s heart: a healthy child, a safe delivery, and an eternal home among our family in Heaven. These desires may be simple, but I just love how the Church recognizes the very real and practical hope a mother has for her child’s health and safety. Yes, their eternal health and safety, but their earthly safety too! It’s not selfish to want things like an uncomplicated pregnancy, a smooth delivery, and prompt recovery. We may not always be granted these things, but the Church honors the very real and human concerns so present during this time. A Petition for Virtue and Strength The blessing ends with the concluding rite: May God, the source of all life, protect you by his goodness. May he deepen your faith, build up your hope, and constantly increase the gift of his love in you. At the hour of delivery may he be attentive to your prayers and strengthen you with his grace. and may almighty God bless you all, the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. These final lines repeat the sentiment of the preparatory words asking for deepened faith and rising hope. It then asks for the virtue which mothers need most, the virtue of charity. God’s grace is needed for a mother to hold within her a nurturing spirit and a heart of patience. I also love how this prayer asks specifically for help “at the hour of delivery.” In my own experience, this is the most unknown, intimidating, and vulnerable hour of the 6,720 hours of pregnancy! Praise God we have a prayer for it! Pregnant Mothers, Ask for This Blessing! If you are expecting and haven’t yet asked your Priest for a blessing over your pregnancy, I can’t encourage you enough to do so. For me, it was an experience both of strengthened faith and greater comfort in the maternal nature of our Church. A Church so ready and eager to pour out God’s grace, sometimes even when we don’t realize we even need it. Are you expecting a child? Have you ever received this blessing? For those struggling with infant loss and/or infertility, Blessed is She devotional writer Laura Kelly Fanucci has a beautiful resource. She has written beautiful prayers for pregnancy, including one specifically for couples trying to conceive. You are not alone in this cross you are carrying. I am praying for you!   [bctt tweet="The Church's Blessing Over Expectant Mothers #BISblog //" via="no"]

Admittedly, I am frequently annoyed by “Christian catch-phrases.” By this, I mean those phrases and words that get thrown around within Christian circles, label you as a "church person," and can be classified under the language of “Christian-ese.” Early on in my journey of faith, one such word that grew to irritate me was the word “intentional.” I heard all about the importance of being intentional in my friendships, in my prayer, and in my interactions with others, yet I had no idea what being intentional actually looked like. I wanted to look like it, because I thought that in order to become the good Christian girl I desired to be, I had to look and be intentional. And yet I was sailing at sea with no compass in an effort to be something when I didn’t even know what it meant. What Does "Being Intentional" Really Mean? We don’t want to succumb to just talking the talk of Church lingo. We actually want to live it out. But to live it out, we need to think about and discuss some of these ideals and phrases. What does it mean to actually be a woman of intentionality? I believe it is very noble to strive for intentionality. I believe that when women foster intentionality, the world has the capability to be changed. So how do we grasp intentionality? To be intentional, I believe, can be further explained as embracing three things: purposefulness inconvenience discomfort 1. Purposeful To be intentional means to be purposeful. It means to perform your actions for a reason. It means looking the cashier in the eye and saying hello, not so they will get you through the line faster, but so that you can actually see them as the individual they are. It means putting your phone away when you’re catching up with friends. It means saying, “We should hang out,” only if you actually mean it. It means focusing on the present moment and the person in front of you instead of thinking of all the things you still have to do. Walking with this kind of purpose throughout our daily interactions, can be extremely inconvenient. Which brings me to my second point. 2. Inconvenience Women who desire to embrace intentionality must be willing to welcome inconvenience. The truth is, the to-do lists are not growing any shorter these days, and the amount of things that can distract us from the present moment is immense. It would be much more convenient to text those five people I need to respond to while waiting in the check out line than interacting with the person in front of me. It might “save time in the long run” to be thinking about other separate situations while talking with a friend over coffee. It can be easy to turn our prayer time into simply wind-down time rather than conversation with Jesus. There are always things we can choose to distract us. But to be intentional means to give those things their own time, and focus on the current matter at hand. It means losing some of the time spent on menial tasks in order to give our parents a phone call. It means losing a little bit of sleep at night in order to crack open the Bible. Intentionality cannot be divorced from inconvenience. So we’re left with the question: will we avoid the inconvenient or embrace it? 3. Discomfort Lastly, to be intentional requires that one is capable of experiencing discomfort. Sitting down and having a personal conversation with someone can be extremely awkward. Intentional conversations are frequently filled with long silences, nervous laughter, and left with an awkward feeling. Being intentional is not always pretty. It doesn’t always feel natural. Sometimes, your efforts at being intentional won’t be appreciated or will simply be misunderstood. But you continue the conversation, you continue the habit, you continue the eye contact, knowing that what starts as uncomfortable can grow into something beautiful. The Language of Intentionality It can be extremely challenging to live purposefully, embrace inconvenience, and remain in discomfort. But the good news is, we are not alone in the fight. Not only are there women across the globe who are striving for the same thing, we are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses of intentionality in the Saints. Christ Himself purposefully set time aside for prayer and He stopped at the well to meet the Samaritan woman. He made time for the hemorrhaging woman while He was on the way to heal another. He never brushed by anyone, He never moved around distracted from His surroundings. And we don’t need to look further than the Cross to know He embraced the inconvenient and the uncomfortable with wide open arms. So be a woman of intentionality. Don’t just say the word, live it. And I pray that when you live it, the witness of your life becomes a language of its own.   [bctt tweet="The Woman of Intentionality #BISblog //" via="no"]   Mary Grace “Gracie” Tillman is a full-time student and full-time extrovert. If you don’t find her with her friends, odds are she’s lost on a backroad with her music all the way up. She loves sports, writing, one-on-ones over coffee, and all things related to Divine Mercy. She strives to life live every day to the fullest and be a joyful disciple of Jesus.

Welcome to our Sisterhood Series! It's our birthday month, and we are celebrating by introducing you to some of the beautiful women in our community. We can't wait for you to meet them. Hi Caitlin! Tell us a bit about who you are and where you're from! // I am Caitlin Russ from St. Paul, Minnesota! I married my high school sweetheart eight years ago, and we have spent the past decade supporting each other through his surgical training and my own occupational therapy studies and then transition to stay at home motherhood. We have three kids and a fourth due in November. Life with this crew is always busy and chaotic, but never boring! What is your favorite way to pray? // I would never turn down an hour of quiet prayer in an Adoration chapel, but right now my favorite way to pray is saying "Hail Mary" ...on repeat! Those rote prayers are quick and easy offerings throughout the entire day that allow me to give thanks and remind me I've got someone watching out for me. Why is community important to you? How has it felt when you have had good community? // Community lifts us up and keeps us going! We are not meant to live this life alone, so building up a strong community that has your back can truly help through the hard times.. and makes the good times even more enjoyable! Ironically, this past year I simultaneously experienced both having a good community while also feeling completely isolated from community. During the pandemic, our family moved across the country to Maine for my husband's surgical training. We knew no one and most buildings kept their doors shut due to the pandemic. I felt myself constantly on edge because if something were to happen to one of us, I did not have a single person in the city that I could call for help. Thankfully, the women I knew from my Blessed is She small group back in Minnesota continued to include and connect with me via Zoom, email, and text throughout my year away. While they were not physically near, their check-ins, coffee gift cards, and constant reassurance of prayer kept me afloat and connected to a greater community. What about something about what a friend has done in your life that has radically changed your life? // Honestly, I think it is the smallest acts of kindness that stand out as the greatest acts of friendship. Back in college I returned to my dorm late at night to find a post-it note ... "Wake us anytime!" my friends wrote. It had been a tough week, but their note reassured me that I wasn't going through it alone. When I think back to that I am reminded that a quick text message sent to a friend or a smile at a stranger might not mean much to one person, but it could be just the encouragement a person needs in that moment. What is the biggest quality you look for in a close friend? // Someone who is there for me when I need it without my asking. It is hard to ask for help! I love to think I can do it all on my own, but I absolutely cannot ... no one can. A friend who shows up or checks in even when I'm not the best at responding is such a treasure. Also, laughter. I can't imagine a friendship without laughter. What kind of friend do you hope to be? // I hope to be someone who shows up, listens, and supports the other person. I hope my friends know that they can call on me even if it has been a while since we last saw each other. Tell us about a time a friend led you closer to Jesus. // I had a friend in college invite me to join her at a weekly Adoration hour. I was new to Adoration and uncomfortable starting something that I knew little about, but those weekly visits with the reassurance from a friend brought me both physically and spiritually closer to Jesus. That small invitation truly transformed my relationship with God.   Now we want to hear about YOU! Answer one or any of the questions in the comments below.   [bctt tweet="BIS Sisterhood Series // Caitlin #BISblog #BISsisterhood //" via="no"]

Whoever receives one child such as this in my name, receives me; and whoever receives me, receives not me but the One who sent me. // Mark 9:37 Love this from today's readings. Let His word dwell in us richly, sisters. Download your F R E E wallpapers right here --->>> Phone wallpaper Desktop wallpaper

Of my four children, three are teenagers. I serve as a Client Advocate at a crisis pregnancy center where ladies of varied ages, colors, and creeds come to verify pregnancies. These pregnancies are most often unplanned and I sit across from women filled with fear and despair as they physically wring their hands and weep. They assess their complicated life circumstances, discuss pressures, and weigh options to make a life-changing decision. This is the case whether they choose life or abortion. Becoming a parent, placing one’s baby for adoption, or ending the life of a baby growing in one’s womb is life changing. Abortion is often seen as a quick fix that brings immediate relief and solves a dire “problem,” yet I have learned through countless accounts that abortion is frequently the start of serious, long-term troubles and causes inner turmoil and regret. I have a lot to share about all of that, but for now I wish to take a step back in the hope that you will take a moment to contemplate my perspective. Your Bright Future College is on the horizon for many bright, talented, ambitious young people. The hook-up culture, binge drinking, and drug use will be present in abundance no matter the university, just like in high school. Here is what I know. I want you to enjoy college and earn a degree. I want you to fall in love with someone with whom you share mutual respect and common values. I don’t want your big plans and life goals derailed by pregnancy before you are ready for that responsibility. Becoming a mother has been the single greatest joy of my life and down the road, I want you to rejoice when you discover you are about to become a parent! Life is a gift! Every time two people engage in sexual intercourse, there is the possibility of pregnancy. From the moment of conception, the “cluster of cells” growing within is a very tiny, new and unique human organism possessing all of the genetic information necessary to grow and develop into a fully formed person. Embryology supports this basic definition of life. Sex is Beautiful By Design Sexuality is a natural part of humanity that perpetuates our species. My four children were not immaculately conceived and the incredible pull of sexual attraction is not a foreign experience. I understand the biological intensity with which hormones drive sexual behavior and I think sex is wonderful. First Things First I also know that a “No Sex Before Marriage” approach will prevent a whole lot of heartache and protect one’s body, soul and psyche. When people stray from God’s right order, things often get complicated fast. One’s purity is a precious gift to a future spouse. I recognize this concept as uncommon and countercultural to everything that is conveyed through media. I don’t care. It is right. It is true. Scientifically speaking, there is fascinating brain chemistry research on the effect of premarital sex in the book Hooked: The Brain Science on How Casual Sex Affects Human Development by McIlhaney and McKissic Bush. Casual sex has negative implications psychologically and physically. Sexually transmitted diseases are pervasive in young, sexually active populations and may be asymptomatic, while silently harming reproductive health and potentially causing cancer. Some STDs are not curable. Hear Me Now Please let this seed of truth be planted in your heart. Plenty of Christians find themselves in circumstances that are outside the order they intended. You would be shocked by how many babies are aborted because their mothers are afraid to share news of the unexpected pregnancy with their parents whom they don’t wish to disappoint. If you ever find yourself in this difficult position, please know that there are pregnancy centers in every major city filled with skilled, loving people able to help women navigate rough waters during uncertain times. I am convinced love trumps everything. In the end, no matter the perceived “disappointment,” love for a future grandchild will prevail. Placing a baby for adoption is another courageous way to choose life when a young woman is not able to parent after lovingly carrying her baby to term. Acting against an innate maternal instinct and one’s conscience will have a profound impact, and fathers of aborted babies face their own complex emotions. Points to Ponder Unless you are currently prepared to bring a child into the world with a particular person, don’t have sex. Obviously, alcohol decreases inhibitions and may lead to actions one would normally avoid if sober. Communicate your boundaries and avoid situations where you are alone and must rely on sheer will power to stop the natural progression of intimacy that occurs in relationships. I don’t believe you will regret not having sex before marriage, but I’m convinced the opposite is often true. If you are a virgin, take pride in that reality. Stay the course. If you have already had sex, that doesn’t mean you have to remain on the current road. You are the driver. Be strong and virtuous. What advice would you give to young people navigating the hook up culture today?   [bctt tweet="Big Choices // A Letter to Young People #BISblog //" via="no"]   Written by Julie Overlease. Find out more about her here.

I know exactly one person who knew as a child what she wanted to be when she grew up. One. She told us in second grade what she planned to do for a living, and she was right. She might tell the story differently as far as how that all unfolded, but from the perspective of an outside observer, she hit the nail on the head. That said, many of us take a meandering road toward our calling, and even then only dabble in the pursuits that make our hearts sing. Very often, however, we notice that those gifts we uncover later in life were planted in us early-on. Sometimes the hobbies or tendencies we experienced as children shed a great deal of light on our "blue flame" later on. A Woman of Many Talents Saint Hildegard of Bingen fits beautifully into both camps. Her early encounters with the Lord made it clear that her life would be particularly inspired, not to mention the wide array of talents she had up her sleeve. Though quiet at first, her willingness to trust the Spirit’s guidance for her life blessed the world tremendously. There is a lot to love about Hildegard. She was a great many things in her lifetime: poet, theologian, pharmacist, artist, composer, and mystic to name a few. She is the 35th Doctor of the Church, and the fourth woman to be given the title (alongside Saint Catherine of Siena, Saint Teresa of Avila, and Saint Therese of Lisieux). It was as recently as 2012 that Hildegard was canonized as a Doctor of the Church. Our Particular Callings In many cases people were reluctant to believe that one person could be gifted in so many different ways—that is my initial response as well! “No way,” I think to myself. No way one person has been so divinely inspired in so many ways when so often I feel like a mediocre disciple trying to hone in on one area where I might have more to offer. Turns out I have been overlooking one major factor. Trust in my particular calling (and others’ for that matter). People had suspicions about Jesus, too. “Is he not the carpenter’s son?” "Where did all of this extraordinary grace and wisdom come from?" they muttered out of suspicion. But, we know something the people of Jesus’ time did not. We know exactly where that grace and wisdom were coming from. Though their identities are entirely distinct, I suspect we can confidently say the something similar of Saint Hildegard, they have one defining characteristic in common: Jesus, and Hildegard (and all of the saints) through His grace, exemplify the abundantly fruitful lives we are capable of living when we place our trust in God’s plan for us. Each had a radical confidence in what the Father was entrusting to them. My Own Capacity to Trust I read a comment from Mother Angelica recently that made me wonder at my own capacity for trust, and how much more the Lord would accomplish through me with my willingness to trust that I too might be a conduit for grace in large and small ways. I am not afraid to fail, I am scared to death of dying and having the Lord say to me. 'Angelica, this is what you might have done had you trusted me more'. // Mother Angelica Saint Hildegard may have been ahead of her time. Perhaps she was just too busy to give in to worry about the variety and magnitude of her particular call. She was both confident and humble in the sharing of her gifts. There is no question that she was given a tremendous capacity to serve God. She stewarded it well and the ripple effect has been substantial. Has your own playing small served the greater good? Where have you felt compelled to a place of greater trust? All of creation is a song of praise to God. Love abounds in all things, excels from the depths to beyond the stars, is lovingly disposed to all things. // Hildegard of Bingen   [bctt tweet="Saint Hildegard of Bingen #BISblog //" via="no"]

It was only eight o’clock in the morning. I already drove my children to school and was back home. I unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher. And just before heading to my weekly Holy Hour, I checked my calendar and email. I noticed a message I was waiting for, hoping for. And so I opened it. Immediately, my heart sank. The good news I anticipated turned out to be disappointing. It was not a congratulatory email; it was a rejection. Instead of “yes,” it was “no.” I started to cry. Rejection stings. I felt so incredibly hopeless. I did not really know what to do next, what to think, where to go, how to process it. And then I remembered: Jesus was waiting for me in the Adoration Chapel. Pray Anyway As I drove to church, I did not feel like praying. But I made a commitment to be at the chapel from 9-10 a.m. every Tuesday morning. So, someone was depending on me to take her place. Plus, Jesus was there. He was waiting for me. As I settled into the pew, I gazed at Our Lord Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, and a wave of peace washed over me. He saw me. He knew. Before I said a word, He knew it all. And He gazed upon me with love and acceptance, not rejection. As I began praying, I was led to this Scripture passage: ... in him it is always ‘Yes.’ For in him every one of God’s promises is a ‘Yes.’ For this reason it is through him that we say the ‘Amen,’ to the glory of God. // 2 Corinthians 1:19-20 After receiving such disappointing news—a definite “no”—I turned to the Lord, and His response was “yes.” Yes to my existence. Yes to my gifts. Yes to my purpose. Yes to my belonging to Him. “... in him it is always ‘Yes.’” Christ’s Peace Surpasses Understanding And in that prayerful moment, I was able to surrender my disappointment to the Lord and entrust my hurt to Him. I felt peace, even in the midst of such devastating news. Even though I was uncertain about the future and God’s will for me, I knew with all my heart that I belonged to Him. This experience helped me realize how important it is to pray during times of disappointment, discouragement, hopelessness, and uncertainty. Looking back, I could have responded in so many ways to my bad news. I could have spent the rest of the morning scrolling through social media, going through the drive-through line, shopping, or keeping busy with mindless activities. But all of those other coping mechanisms would have only been escapism. None of them would have brought me to the Lord, and I certainly would not have felt His peace or heard His words of comfort and assurance. Prayer Tethers Us to Christ The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches us that “prayer is a vital necessity.” And it is especially vital when life feels hopeless. Prayer is not a magic bullet that instantly fixes our problems, changes our circumstances, or heals our sufferings. But prayer keeps us tethered to the Lord—the Mighty One, the Author of Life, the Divine Physician. And when we are tethered to Him, He transforms our outlook and emotions. We remember we are not alone, as we receive His grace, hear His Word, and feel His love. Holy Mother Church Shows Us the Way To encourage us in the importance of praying when prayer seems hopeless, we only need to turn to Holy Mother Church for wisdom and guidance. Below is a list of Scriptures to pray, Church teachings to implement, and saintly wisdom to ponder. These treasures from Heaven remind us that when prayer feels hopeless, all we really need is to run to Jesus and entrust it (over and over) to Him. Scriptures to Pray Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his presence continually. // 1 Chronicles 16:11 … the Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. // Job 1:21 The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. // Psalm 145:18 Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. // Jeremiah 19:12 Are any among you suffering? They should pray. Are any cheerful? They should sing songs of praise. // James 5:13 And this is the boldness we have in him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. // 1 John 5:14 Church Teachings to Implement “But when we pray, do we speak from the height of our pride and will, or ‘out of the depths’ of a humble and contrite heart? He who humbles himself will be exalted; humility is the foundation of prayer.” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2559) “The wonder of prayer is revealed beside the well where we come seeking water: there, Christ comes to meet every human being. It is he who first seeks us and asks us for a drink. Jesus thirsts; his asking arises from the depths of God's desire for us. Whether we realize it or not, prayer is the encounter of God's thirst with ours. God thirsts that we may thirst for him.” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2560) “... we pray not to remind God or tell Him of what we need, but to acknowledge that He is the Supreme Giver, to adore and worship Him by showing our entire dependence upon Him …” (Baltimore Catechism, lesson 28) “Prayer is a vital necessity … How can the Holy Spirit be our life if our heart is far from him?” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2744) “Jesus always responds to a prayer offered in faith.” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2616) Saintly Wisdom to Ponder “Prayer is the raising of one’s mind and heart to God …” // St. John Damascene “Prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy.” // St. Thérèse of Lisieux “Reach up as high as you can today, and God will reach down the rest of the way.” // St. Pio of Pietrelcina "You pay God a compliment by asking great things of Him." // St. Teresa of Avila "Nothing is equal to prayer; for what is impossible it makes possible, what is difficult, easy." // St. John Chrysostom "Prayer is the place of refuge for every worry, a foundation for cheerfulness, a source of constant happiness, a protection against sadness." // St. John Chrysostom How have you found prayer helpful during a hopeless situation?   [bctt tweet="How to Pray Even When It Seems Hopeless #BISblog //" via="no"]

Welcome to our Sisterhood Series! It's our birthday month, and we are celebrating by introducing you to some of the beautiful women in our community. We can't wait for you to meet them. Hi Megan! Tell us a bit about who you are and where you're from! // I’m Megan Lu. I currently live in Bayport, Minnesota just outside of the Twin Cities. I am married to my husband, Tu, and have three amazing children: Judith, Maxine, and Francis. I am an avid reader, baker, and Packer fan. What is your favorite way to pray? // My favorite way to pray is to ask for God's intervention as it’s needed during the difficult and joyful parts of my day. These conversations with God and asking for help from the Holy Spirit are so enlightening and empowering. The prayer I fall back on the most is the Hail Mary. It’s my prayer of comfort. Why is community important to you? How has it felt when you have had good community? // Before BIS I did not have a good community. As a new unmarried mom I was often ostracized from the typical Catholic moms group. I felt so alone and far away from God. I then found the BIS daily devotionals and an online community I never knew I needed. When I moved to the Twin Cities I reached out to Nell for parish and neighborhood advice. That random reach out led me to find the most fulfilling friendships I have had in my life. One week after we moved I went to Nell's house to start a Bible study and that invite led me to the path I have followed today. The women I have met here through BIS have listened to my story, seen me and helped me grow into the woman I am right now. God has shown me that through these friendships and that by me telling my story, I am listening to the Holy Spirit. What is the biggest quality you look for in a close friend? // Genuine kindness. What kind of friend do you hope to be? // I hope to be the kind of friend you reach out to when you have a problem. The kind of friend who prays for you. The friend who is always there to lend an ear or a hand. Tell us about a time a friend led you closer to Jesus. // After spending the last several years truly growing in my faith I was pushed by a friend—and likely the Holy Spirit—to join the Well. Through joining that unique experience I learned so much about myself, about how I truly can embody the Holy Spirit. Without her pushing me I would have missed out on an incredible opportunity to grow. Now we want to hear about YOU! Answer one or any of the questions in the comments below.   [bctt tweet="BIS Sisterhood Series // Megan #BISblog #BISsisterhood //" via="no"]

As a woman, I understand the temptation to place my value on my looks, and especially on my hair. It’s funny how a woman’s hair can become her security blanket, relying on it to feel any bit of confidence in public. As long as I have my hair done, I feel ready to face the world. So imagine the horror I felt when I realized I would lose all my hair while pregnant with my first son. When that was taken away, I didn’t know how to love myself. Pregnant, Confused, and Bald Halfway through the pregnancy, I began to experience intense itching on my scalp and I would scratch my head until it bled. I thought I was going insane. The itching was followed by severe hair loss. I was pulling out chunks of hair every day, multiple times a day. It seemed as if hair covered every surface of our home. My daughter would play and run back with my hair stuck on her fingers and lips. Every time I showered, I created wild, imaginative art murals with my hair on the shower wall, and afterwards collected hair balls the size of my whole palm. My OB doctor referred me to a dermatologist. I spent over $600 on blood tests trying to figure out what was happening to me and I was actually disappointed when all of my results came back healthy and normal. I wanted something to be wrong with me, just so I could have an answer, and therefore, a cure. Every week, my hair thinned drastically. My hairline was receding and the part in my hair was splitting wide like the Red Sea. I bought all kinds of expensive steroid treatments, wigs, special shampoos, and hair products, praying that my hair would stop falling out. Fighting the Devil’s Lies I spent a lot of nights crying. Every time I walked past a mirror, I felt ugly and ashamed. Every night, I would look at myself and think “You’re disgusting. You look hideous. How can anyone love you when you look like that?” It took a long time before I realized that it had been the devil whispering that in my ear all along. I was depressed and miserable, and really angry with God. Why was this happening to me? I didn’t want to talk to Him or have a relationship with Him until my hair came back. I didn’t pray, I didn’t worship, I didn’t want anything to do with Him. All I wanted was my hair back. It got to a point where I had such little hair, I looked like Gollum from Lord of the Rings... until I mustered up the courage to shave my head. I cried and laughed in the bathtub while my husband went at it with the clippers. I felt scared, liberated, horrified, and relieved all at once. I had finally let go of any hope of salvaging my hair and literally had to cut off what had become my false idol. Redefining Beauty I realize there are women who suffer much greater trials during pregnancy and that people have far worse reasons for losing their hair. I always knew that looks aren’t everything and that beauty goes beyond the physical. But I didn’t truly believe it for myself until I was forced to find the beauty in my balding head. Talk about a lesson in humility. It was the cause of many spiritual attacks and it was a daily fight to keep from hating myself. As I struggled to keep my appearance from dictating my worth as a person, God used the people in my life to show me that I am still beautiful. My husband would rub my head and kiss me even though I didn’t want him to look at me. My daughter didn’t see me any differently; I was still her mommy who loved and provided for her. My friends reassured me that I could pull off this new look, and my family reminded me of how brave I was to sacrifice my hair for my son. Through these people, I realized that I am loved beyond measure. They helped me to see that I am wanted most of all by Jesus. That He delights in me and who I am, despite how I look and my imperfections. What Is Beauty? I had to ask myself, “What is beauty?” We see plenty of beautiful people everyday in public, on television, in magazines, and the internet. But when you strip away the big hair, the makeup, the toned bodies, and pretty clothes, you realize those are not the things that make one beautiful. It may be harder to recognize but there is beauty in each of us. I realized that beauty is joy. It’s about not taking yourself too seriously and finding humor in your life everyday. It’s about believing that you are good and that you are loved. Beauty is kindness and sacrifice. It’s about the way you treat people and make them feel important and cared for. It’s about the big and little sacrifices you make that may or may not go unnoticed. Beauty is confidence. It’s about knowing and believing you make a difference. It’s about being kind to yourself, and being YOU in all of your uniqueness, knowing that there is no one else in the world like you. Beauty is understanding your gifts and talents, and using them to become the best possible version of yourself while lifting up others to do the same. My Most Beautiful Moment During the last few weeks of the pregnancy, my hair started growing back slowly but surely. Then my son entered the world (with a full head of hair, ironically) and the second he was placed into my arms, I knew it was all worth it. I never thought I’d have such a drastic look when it came to my appearance, but I learned to like it with every passing day (no tangles and 5 minute showers are game changers). Most of all, I learned how to love myself and see myself the way God sees me: full of dignity and beauty, worthy of his love in all of my imperfections, which are made perfect through Him. The pursuit of loving oneself is a daily journey and I pray that you will read this and know that whether you are a woman or man, young or old, with hair or no hair, you are beautiful. You are worthy. You are loved. What characteristics do you attribute to beauty—in yourself and in others? What sort of lies tempt you to feel unworthy? What is God trying to say to you to dispel those lies? Who is one person you can reach out to this week and affirm their beauty?   [bctt tweet="Uncovering the Real Meaning of My Beauty #BISblog //" via="no"]   Written by Maggie Kim.

If you have been a part of the #BISsisterhood for a while, then you know that, each year, we bring you devotionals for the Advent and Lenten seasons. You have been asking us for a devotional that can be used throughout the year, too. A year-long devotional that can be a companion to your prayer. We are so excited to tell you about Made New. Made New: A Year-Long Devotional for Catholic Women When a publisher reached out from Harper Collins about collaborating on a book, I kind of couldn't believe my email. My interest and intrigue grew as we met and heard about what they were open to and what Blessed is She could bring to the table. In my heart, I have always believed our devotional writing team to be the best writers out there, Catholic or no. Just a remarkable group of women who write from their hearts each and every day for the whole world to read, for tens of thousands of women to receive in our free daily emails, for them to open our Advent and Lent devotional books, for them to hear how our prayer and relationship with God is going in an unfiltered, real way. So as their Managing Editor, I couldn't have been more proud than when our book pitches were received so graciously, and our writers leapt in. They wrote at what I would call a drop-dead-marathon-pace. Brittany Calavitta, Liz Kelly, Leana Bowler, Jenna Guizar, and me all wrote as fast as our little hearts could. Then we edited and edited and of course, dragged our fearless Theological Editor, Susanna Spencer into the mix and she read and read. We turned in a manuscript that was strong, clean, and darn-near ready for publication! Jenna wrangled the art end of things, and Ash Ulmer put together the most beautiful Scripture pull-quotes and cover. The women we worked with at Harper Collins Christian Book Division (Thomas Nelson) were all-in for the book, believed in us, helped us navigate the churn-y waters, and landed this gorgeous book into our laps. We're so very grateful. Enough of the backstory, on to the book! What to Expect It's a book for your whole year in 2022. Who doesn't need to be made new after all we've been through? And it's called just that, Made New, to shine light on the ways our identity is made new in God. It's divided into five sections: beheld belong beloved believing becoming The five writers tell ten stories each (well, I snuck in an eleventh) from ten stages of life, ten different seasons that we all experienced so differently. But yet, rooted in a Scripture passage for each week, we come to the same conclusion: our identity isn't in how successful or how popular or how acclaimed, or how included, or how loved on we are by people but rather being made in God's image and likeness. It's been about Him all along. Oh yes, and there are two questions I drafted after each reflection and they're to help you find out this truth too. I weep over our stories, I laugh, and I cheer. I know you will, too. Please get a pre-order copy. We've put together some sweet gifts for those who pre-order. But no matter how you get it, you, your sister, your bestie, your neighbor, and your grandma all need this book to experience being made new in 2022. We're all in this together, so we made this book for you.   [bctt tweet="Made New: A Women's Year-Long Devotional #BISblog //" via="no"]

Welcome to our Sisterhood Series! It's our birthday month, and we are celebrating by introducing you to some of the beautiful women in our community. We can't wait for you to meet them. Hi Kara! Tell us a bit about who you are and where you're from! // Hi, I'm Kara. I am in my 6th year as a Middle School Special Education teacher. As an Army brat I've grown up all over the place, but now live in Virginia. What is your favorite way to pray? // One of my favorite ways to pray, inspired by Beth Davis, is to go on a Father/Daughter date. This prayer practice has helped me invite the Father into all aspects of my daily life and little joys. I have found healing in places I didn't even know I needed it and overall it makes me feel like a kid again and that's just the best. Plus, any excuse to eat ice cream and call it prayer! Why is community important to you? How has it felt when you have had good community? // I think I took community for granted growing up on military posts because there is such a strong sense of it there. You know all of your neighbors and you help each other in the good and difficult times. After college, I found that a good community was hard to find. It can feel like you are all on your own or like you may just have to settle for less. I remember praying for community and right after that discovering Blessed Is She on Instagram. I read the bio that said, "Ever wondered if you'd find a community of like-minded Catholic women? You just did," and I knew it was an answered prayer. It's not always easy to enter into true community. It requires a certain level of vulnerability and humility, but is so heart filling when I have allowed myself to do so! We were meant to live in community and I am so grateful for the role BIS has played in mine. What is something a friend has done in your life that has radically changed your life? // My prayer partner from The Well has radically changed my life through our friendship. Looking back on our friendship, it has been a lot of little, simple things that have sparked such a radical change in my life. Her encouragement, listening ear, and prayers are invaluable to me. I appreciate that we can be exactly ourselves with one another and there are no pretenses. I love that we have gotten to a point where we can call each other up and ask for prayers for "the usual" like we are ordering at a frequented restaurant. I am praying that everyone has a friend like Alison in their life. What is the biggest quality you look for in a close friend? // How they treat others is important to me. My closest friends are the ones who genuinely want the best for others. They have a remarkable level of selflessness that I hope rubs off on me! What kind of friend do you hope to be? // I hope to be the kind of friend that you know is in your corner and cares for you. The type of friend who helps you see the beauty of who you are when you have a hard time seeing it yourself. And the type of friend you call up when you want to try out that weird workout class, meet halfway for milkshakes, or go on an impromptu weekend trip. Tell us about a time a friend led you closer to Jesus. // One time in college I saw my friend, Emily, praying after receiving Communion. I can still picture the look on her face. It was so serene and joyful that it stuck with me. I wanted prayer like that. I wanted my relationship with God to be so real that it was tangible to myself and others. I didn't tell her about this moment until years later. For years she never knew that she led me closer to Jesus simply by her example of being with Him in prayer. Thanks, Emily! Now we want to hear about YOU! Answer one or any of the questions in the comments below.   [bctt tweet="BIS Sisterhood Series // Kara #BISblog #BISsisterhood //" via="no"]