The word "mentor" is defined as "a wise and trusted counselor or teacher." To me, a female mentor is supposed to share the Gospel and her life, just like a nurturing mother, teaching and learning from her spiritual daughters that both may walk in God’s ways. She should be an authentic missionary disciple who has been converted, strengthened, and transformed in the Lord. We live in a world that has a very different definition of what it means to be someone’s mentor. Eternal Development People pay high dollar amounts to attend seminars to learn from other successful business people about how they can be better at what they do and amass their own fortune. There isn't anything wrong with trying to be the best that you can be in your career. However, I do think there’s something wrong with being so focused on being successful in this life that we forget that more attention should be given to preparing our souls to spend eternity with God. Most of the books on this subject focus on mentorship as a way to help someone do well in life, achieve financial freedom, and so on. What about the kind of mentoring that focuses on living our life in preparation for our final home in Heaven? A mentorship that’s all about heart and spiritual formation, through prayer and fellowship with the Church through discipleship. My Journey of Faith We can gain a lot of wisdom by looking back and reflecting on our own lives. I am privileged to be in a season of life that is affording me to give back and encourage others. Looking back on my own faith journey, I can see how God, in His goodness, didn’t wait for me to find my way to Him. Instead, I can clearly see how He was always pursuing me and coming after me, using different situations and people to help me get to know Him and His Church. My lack of understanding and knowledge of my Catholic Faith started changing in 2008 when my husband and I decided to move our young family from South Florida to his hometown of Bismarck, ND to be close to his parents. We felt it was important for the kids to grow up near their grandparents if at all possible, and my parents still live in Brazil. Of all places, Bismarck was where God had big plans for my faith life to take flight. The Catholic Faith is alive and well there. We belonged to a vibrant parish and made friends with many great people. My in-laws introduced us to Jerry and Sara, a dynamic couple who were very involved in the parish. David and I were invited to a gathering they held at their house each month, simply called “young adults." Group Discipleship Every month, Sara and Jerry would open their home to dozens of people seeking a closer relationship with God and with their community. They would recruit amazing speakers for our gatherings (most of whom were young priests from the Bismarck diocese). Some of the wives in this group would get together every week at each other’s homes for what we called: coffee. At coffee, we would pray, laugh, cry, discuss the Church’s teachings with great enthusiasm, and watch our little ones play together. Through those monthly “young adults" gatherings and the weekly coffee with my new friends, God was slowly inviting me to the fullness of His community: the body of Christ. These women I met in Bismarck, who would become some of my best friends, knew how to beautifully integrate their Catholic Faith into the fabric of their everyday life. I found this to be very inspiring and hoped it was contagious. They were becoming my spiritual mentors. Here I was, in my 30’s, and for the first time in my adult life, I found myself surrounded by all these beautiful and faithful Catholic women who were not afraid to talk about their faith and their love for Jesus. Being in their presence and learning so much about my Faith made me realize just how starved for spiritual mentoring I had been all my life. The Power of Spiritual Mentoring through Storytelling By nature, human beings are storytellers. Stories have the power to connect us to one another more than anything else. They can help us understand who we are. We shouldn't be afraid that we are not worthy to speak His name or to share all God has done in our lives through sharing our stories. Families are in crisis. Men and women are suffering. Society in general is seeing unprecedented unrest. Now more than ever we need the Truth of the Gospel. It is my hope that God gives us the graces necessary to be a light in our homes, families, workplaces, and communities. One way for us to do that is by learning how to be spiritual mentors to one another. I can honestly say that having all the wonderful men and women who throughout the years have taken their time to spiritual mentor me has been essential in developing my full potential and navigating the variety of pitfalls we all encounter in ministry life. I truly believe we can never succeed in anything alone. A few years ago, I was blessed with the inspiration to write my first book, Wisdom From the Women We Love. The theme of spiritual mentoring is woven throughout this book. Wisdom From The Women We Love is a collection of personal stories from 26 women of different ages and backgrounds who ,by sharing their wisdom, were in a way mentoring us spiritually through their stories. To Need Each Other I love what the Lord said to Saint Catherine of Siena: I could have easily created men possessed of all that they should need for both body and soul, but I wish that one should need each other and that they should be my ministers to administer the graces and gifts that they have received from me. I can see how God was instructing Saint Catherine of Sienna on the need for us to have spiritual mentors. Spiritual mentors are essential if we want to come to a deeper faith in Jesus. My spiritual mentors remain vital today as I try to grow as a missionary disciple. I pray that you are blessed with men and women who will make the time to spiritual mentor you, and that in return you’ll welcome the idea of spiritually mentoring others as well. Have you ever had someone spiritually mentor you? If so, what was that like? Have you thought about the possibility of being a spiritual mentor to someone?   [bctt tweet="The Importance of Spiritual Mentoring #BISblog //" via="no"]   This post contains affiliate links. Thanks so much for supporting the ministry of Blessed is She!

Our very first Lent book exclusively for men is coming out this year... and it's a special one. Father Innocent Montgomery, CFR, wrote it. He walks the reader through their many baptismal identities with a focus on the example of Jesus as the One Who shows us how to live them out in the desert. I think every man in your life needs one (and mine too!). An Interview with Father Innocent Mongomery, CFR Please enjoy hearing the responses about the book from the man himself, Father Innocent! Father Innocent, tell us about your role as CFR postulant director and the outdoor adventure for the postulants that is a core narrative in your new book, Born of Fire. It is a great blessing for me to be the Postulant Director for our community of the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal. As God calls young men to religious life, they begin a journey we call "formation." This journey is an intense time of growth in the spiritual life as well as our humanity. I love inviting young men on the adventure of formation. I long to remind them that they are beloved sons of the Father, and they have been given a divine inheritance at their holy Baptism. From this place, we dive into our interior life of prayer with God and encounter Him in a deep and new way. As we grow in relationship with Him, we grow to trust Him and allow Him to come and heal the deep places in our hearts that are wounded and hurting. In this encounter, true healing and transformation happens, and then we can live in freedom as sons of God. Men need a concrete invitation to take formation seriously. That is why men need the desert. First, we look to Jesus, the perfect man, who made the desert holy. He went into the desert for 40 days to be with His Father and to teach us how to constantly live in our identity as His sons. Above all, He prioritized His relationship with His Father as the source of His life and identity. From this holy place, Jesus receives everything. I believe that Jesus prepares a place for every man in the desert. That is why I take our postulants brothers to the heart of the Utah desert for 21 days every year. Our exterior journey of backpacking, canyoneering, and rock climbing pushes us to our psychical limits, as it challenges us to dig deep and trust amid the challenges. All of this is at the service of the interior journey. Most importantly, Jesus invites us into the desert to live in a new relationship with the Father. We are called to leave all our comforts and distractions of the world and to receive this gift of intimacy with God. In the desert, we come face-to-face with God and ourselves. In the holy confrontation, we are forced to make real decisions that purify and help us to say "yes" to the men that God desires us to be. This is what makes the desert a holy place. You wrote Born of Fire for men to experience an identity journey. What does that mean for you? In the book, I invite men to go on an "identity pilgrimage." It is the invitation to go on a sacred journey of self-discovery, not from our own human vantage point, but from the Father's. For too long we have allowed ourselves as men to be defined by the world, which leaves us lost and empty. We attempt to "self-define," and we end up living a frustrated existence. The good news is that the Father did not create to live this way. He sent us His Son into the world to save us from our false identities and reveal to use what it means to be true sons of the Father. Jesus Christ, the Son of God, reveals man fully to himself (Gaudium et Spes 22). United to Him, we receive and live our true identity that is given to us by the Father. Our identity as sons of the Father is bestowed on us in a particular way at holy Baptism. The fire of the Holy Spirit is lavished upon us, and we are "born of fire." We are invited to live a new existence as sons of God, constantly growing in our identity to be more like Jesus. When we say "yes" to this journey, our life becomes the "identity pilgrimage." Sons become brothers; brothers become men; men become spouses; spouses become fathers; fathers are mystics; and mystics live as the "new man." This "identity pilgrimage" is an invitation for every man to be fully alive in Jesus Christ. Who did you write this book for? If I’m shopping for my boyfriend, husband, son, or friend, is this book for everyone? This book is written for all men who desire to grow in their identity as sons of the Father. I took great care in my writing to make sure that no matter where you find yourself on the journey of the spiritual life, you could receive the next best step to go deeper. I believe that the "identity pilgrimage" is for every man who desires to be fully alive in his vocation and mission. If the journey is new for man, let Jesus build the foundation of his identity and experience the joy of receiving the gift of who they are in Him. If a man has been on the spiritual journey for a while, let Jesus renew, deepen, and fortify his identity he has received from the Father. Remember, the Father always desires to give His sons "more" in the spiritual life. More life, love, mercy, and fulfillment. I have been asked by a lot of women whether this book would be fruitful for them during Lent. I do realize that it is concretely written for men, but I tell them that if they feel inspired, I think the Lord would definitely use it. Obviously, we all are blessed with our identity as sons and daughters of the Father from our baptism. The Holy Spirit leads us all on this journey of maturity and growth to become fully alive in God. Born of Fire walks through this journey for men, blessing them as sons, brothers, men, spouses, fathers, mystics, and the new man. For women, they are called on the same journey as daughters, sisters, women, spouses, mothers, mystics, and the new woman. Using the simple meditations given in the book, I do think that it would be easy to ‘translate’ to make it personal for the female reader. If I am mistaken in this, at least the book would give some insight into the masculine heart for those women who consistently live before the mystery that is man. What was the biggest challenge of authoring this book? Biggest unexpected joy? I have such a grateful heart to God and Blessed is She for the opportunity to write this book. I never thought I would write a book, so there was so many new graces and experiences. To be honest, when it comes to evangelization in general, I have a fear that my "projects," whether it is preaching, writing, or podcasting, will just be more noise in the crazy world. God knows we do not need more noise or distraction. Over the past couple of years, in particular during my time in the desert, Jesus was moving my heart with this desire to bless people in their identity as sons and daughters of the Father. There was a ton of fire in my heart, and I remember being so moved by the Father’s love for His children and His desire to remind us constantly who we are in His eyes. I remember a deep desire in my heart to be an instrument of the Father’s blessings in this, but I do remember being afraid of what He was asking of me. In many ways, the content of this book is an invitation into my heart as a priest. The call by the Father to be vulnerable and real, and to be an instrument of His blessing for others, is a beautiful challenge and deeply fulfilling. My Blessed is She team is an absolute joy. I have never done this before, so the gift of being cared for every step of the way was incredible. Blessed is She is a family, so I just felt like a little Franciscan brother who was given freedom to be myself and follow Jesus on this amazing journey. Also, it helps that we laughed a lot. I am deeply grateful for all of this. What is your hope for the readers of this book during Lent 2022? As a priest, one of the deepest desires of my heart is to help people pray and experience the gift of their identity as sons and daughters of the Father. So, my hope is that this little book could help people experience intimacy with a God who loves them and comes close to them. My hope that the readers would experience this Lenten journey as a sacred and intense time where the Father can remind them of who they are in their identity. My hope is that the fire of the Holy Spirit that we all received at our baptism would set us ablaze once again to fully live our inheritance as sons and daughters of the Father. Because of the gift of our baptism, every Christian is "born of fire." This fire is the fire of the Holy Spirit that the Father lavished upon us at our Baptism and continues to pour out upon us at every moment of our life. This fire is God’s life that lives in us. My deepest hope is that this book could remind people that there is a fire within, and this fire is the source of our life and mission. Get a free leader guide along with the book, downloadable from the website.   [bctt tweet="Insights from the CFR Priest, Author of Born of Fire #BISblog #BISlent // " via="no"]  

Friends, we have come to the end of our Prayer Pledge. Each year, this seems to sneak up on me, and I'm never quite ready for it to end (which is the goal!). Whether this year's Prayer Pledge went ideally for you or if you struggled through some days and weeks, we have persevered to our final day together.

Sometimes hope looks a lot like perseverance.  I love the imagery in our Prayer Pledge's verse from Isaiah: when we hope we don't grow weary, we do not faint. 

It’s springtime in the Middle East and my 10-year-old recently planted seeds in our garden. He frequents the sun soaked ground for signs of life, but they are nowhere to be seen. We anticipate a bountiful harvest, but for now, the seeds are buried and there is "death."

I couldn’t stop fidgeting from joint aches as I desperately searched for padded pews at Mass that day. My body needed Him. My body needed His Body.

What if he can’t fight this...? I wondered. My closest friend’s six-week-old baby boy was diagnosed with a rare terminal illness and dreams for their long awaited first child were tragically shattered. Our community rallied around them as this tender infant battled surgery, chemotherapy, and blood transfusions, including one week on the ventilator. But of all things that could have occupied her heart that evening, she was thinking of me.

"Hoping against hope, Abraham believed, and thus became the father of many nations." // Catechism of the Catholic Church 1819 No statement better summarizes Abraham, the "archetype of hope" unto whom God promised to make a great nation (see Genesis 12:1-4). But ninety-nine years passed and Abraham still had no heirs (see Genesis 17:1-2), yet he continued to "hope against hope" (Romans 4:18).

It was a busy day at work when the phone rang. The tone of my husband instantly spelled dreadful news. “I’ve been arrested,†he said.

I attended a retreat for women writers in 2008 and had the privilege to study under Kentucky’s poet laureate at the time, Jane Gentry Vance. She shared thoughts on poetry from William Butler Yeats (Harvard Magazine 2008) that made a lasting impression: Poems are not position papers. They are not votes, they are not uttered from a podium or pulpit, they are not essays. They are products of reverie. In the act of writing, one can feel removed from the work at times and even surprised at the finished product. It is frequently a mysterious process that reveals the writer to herself and others. Here’s a personal example. Dear So and So, If only there was a temple, a Solomon house. Lovely, but small and sparrow size. Instead they lie dismembered—feet in jars, with limbs hanging from trees you can’t see. They do a dance of the dead and ask you to listen. You (and sometimes me) dwell in a glass box car. Through the window it’s all a circus. But, I’m looking for the complaint box, to share my idea in the top narrow slot, to please save the babies. Poems are Places to Process Today’s modern climate is so contentious at times it can be scary to talk about controversial issues. Beyond that, faith compels us to take thoughts and feelings and process them with God as seekers of Truth. In this piece, I was processing the events of the National Right to Life March I attended for the first time, in January 2020, as a high school chaperone. In addition to the March, we also visited the Basilica of the National Shrine, National Archives Museum, and Arlington National Cemetery. We made a guided Monuments tour, spent an afternoon at the John Paul II Shrine, and finally toured the Naval Academy a short distance away. The density of these encounters with people and places was hidden to me until I began to write about them later. If poems are not position papers, what am I to do with this piece? If the end game is not social justice first, what is it? Refusing to Edit My Own Heart I’d like to submit to you that this poem is an invitation to reverie. Its job is to be an expression of my heart first, and hopefully an artful contraption of good poetry. Why did I address this to a generic So and So? Because it seemed the best way to honor unnamed babies who do not get the chance to be born. If there is any indictment, it’s on me. I can be prone to sit in my own glass box car, removed from problems right before my eyes. I am guilty, too, of being numb to injustices in our world. What’s more, I am in no position to judge someone’s intention, their understanding of revealed truth, or their degree of responsibility for wrongs committed. My logical mind also knows there’s a difference in a money-making abortion industry and a young, pregnant, unwed mother who is afraid and often convinced by others that abortion is the only answer. But, that’s not the first thing this is about. It’s about the unnamed, unborn, and aborted. It’s about me imagining a lovely and holy place where all these are honored, held, cherished, and remembered. It’s about me considering more deeply and in detail what goes on in an abortion. It’s about not editing my own heart and having the courage to write this and let the language do its work in me first. It’s about me feeling like one person in the back of a huge classroom of yelling, screaming people, while I raise my hand and ask to share my great idea to save all the babies. Social Wholeness Starts with Personal Repentance My experience at the March for Life can be summed up in a few words—a sea of happy, shiny, polite people standing in proxy for the unborn. The crowd was enormous. It was body-to-body for hours. The display of goodwill and manners was unlike any I had seen before in a group that large. Some of the posters were shocking. But still, the holders of those signs were quietly standing, causing no disruption. The veil was pulled back a little more as I encountered the nature of God here. Enveloped in peace, love, joy, kindness, and truth—surrounded by the tension of abortion and those advocating for life. I wondered about a world where courage looked more like humility and how that humility starts with me. Where do you find yourself with complex matters of social justice? Would that we all embrace repentance first as we seek to make our contribution in a world of so many needs.   [bctt tweet="The Relationship Between Personal Holiness and Social Wholeness #BISblog // " via="no"]   Jenny Richeson is a Catholic writer who is a lover of language and its mysteries. By day she provides speech pathology and cognitive intervention services to kids. Her main goal in life is to be a speaking stargazer caught up in wonder whenever possible. She makes her home in Kentucky with her husband, Matt. Together they find God in gardening and all manner of outdoor activities whenever they can. Stargazing is a favorite pastime too. You can find out more about her here.

Soon after Saigon fell to the North Vietnamese Army in 1975, thousands of civilians were imprisoned. One of these was Saigon’s newly appointed archbishop, Francis Xavier Nguyen van Thuan, seized on August 15th.

My mind froze trying to grapple how a friend—someone who knew me so intimately—could betray me. I often chide and say that if there ever were a binding contract for pastoral ministry, the fine print would warn the undersigned that ministry is hazardous, that it would subject them to expressions of animosity, slander, and betrayal. In my grief, I whispered, "Lord, I need hope again!"

Omnipotent. I remember learning this word while studying vocabulary, and the example used was that of an “all-powerful†God. I love this word! Partially because it brings back memories of one of my favorite school subjects, but also because it has such an authoritative tone.

The idea of “living in the moment†sounds blissful, right? Yet sometimes it can be so very hard to do.  I am self-admittedly impatient. This posed a challenge for me when it came to my husband and I planning to start our family.

It's the mark of the first Beatitude, and yet we are quick to breeze past it. It's why the rich young man walked away from Jesus sad, and yet we are slow to put ourselves in his shoes. It is the prerequisite for entering the Kingdom of Heaven, and yet we often twist the call to make it more comfortable. Poverty. I'm convinced that the reason it remains so mysterious a teaching today is because it is one of the keys to sanctity. Gospel Poverty Understand that my thesis does not imply that we neglect those steeped in material poverty. On the contrary, not only is the Gospel clear about our personal poverty—it demands that we work to alleviate the sufferings of the poor. Like most things in Catholicism, this is a beautiful both/and. The poverty that Christ speaks to in the Gospels is a poverty of spirit. This can seem abstract and elusive. But we need only to look at the fruits of materialism, comparison, attachment, control, striving, and self-reliance in our own lives to discover the counter-seed to poverty that concupiscence plants in all of us. It is this poverty that we are to embrace; it's this attachment to "wealth" in all its forms that we are to leave behind in order to follow Him. The Call and the Command Of course, Christ doesn't command us to lay something down without filling us with much greater abundance. The call to and command of poverty is ultimately a promise of supernatural joy. Poverty produces in us great faith, hope, and love. And it is in this Christ-like poverty that we act most justly, most prudently, most courageously, and most temperately. Saint John the Baptist gives us perhaps the most concise explanation of what happens in this exchange of poverty with the Lord: He must increase, I must decrease. // John 3:30 Our poverty—our empty hands—allows us to hold onto the Lord rather than the fleeting things of this world. The Saints, as always, are our models in this response of love. In studying the lives of the Saints—in all their variety—I have found three things they hold in common: All-consuming love for Jesus and devotion to Him in the Blessed Sacrament. A steady and deep devotion to Mary. A radical interior poverty and a particular concern for the poor. For our purposes here, let's examine the third point. The Saints were poor. Regardless of worldly status, they chose the riches of Christ over the riches of the flesh. Yes, there were Saints who were royalty and Saints who slept on dirt floors. All were poor. There were Saints endowed with endless talents and gifts and Saints who couldn't pass high school. All were poor. There were Saints who enjoyed blissful vocations and Saints who lost everyone they loved. All were poor. Their poverty was an overflow of their detachment from the world and their attachment to God. They saw everything in their lives as an invitation into greater intimacy with Him. When blessings came, they received them and sought to serve Him with those blessings. When trials came, their hearts did not waver, and they received them and sought to serve Him in those trials. Thus, great fruits of interior poverty are steadiness of spirit, supernatural gratitude, and unshakeable joy. If We Want to Be Like Him, We Must Be Poor If we want to be more and more conformed to Christ, as is the call of every baptized Christian, then we must see Him as He is. There is no greater poverty than that our Godhead displayed by becoming one of us. The Incarnation is the path to poverty for every single one of us. And if we might fail to see the sublime humility of God in the Incarnation, He made sure to highlight it by being born poor, into a poor family, into a poor town. If we truly want to be like Him, then, we must be poor. He Will Help Us A great gift of the Lord's merciful love is that, if we are seeking Him with all our heart, we don't have to figure out how to be poor on our own. He will help us. He will show us how our crosses can produce an undeniable poverty of spirit. He will strip what needs stripped. He will topple the idols in our lives. If we allow Him, He will give us the grace to unclench our hands and let go of the control we so desperately cling to. Because He is the One we were made to cling to in all our desperation. Jesus does not call us to spiritual poverty and then neglect to show us the way. On the contrary, we can look to His poverty, His sacrifice, His obedience, and His humility to find the counter-cultural road to true freedom and happiness. This call is a difficult one to live, but the rewards are beyond our earthly imaginings. Ways to Cultivate Interior Poverty As you seek the Lord's Heart and ask Him to help you be poor, be on the lookout. He will respond, and He will show you. And while you walk with Him along your particular path to holiness, there are some ways you can consistently cultivate interior poverty. Here are just a few ideas: Examine your life and conscience // The first step is to take a regular look at your life and soul. Where are you naturally bent toward a holy poverty, and where do you cling tightly to things or people other than God? Identify those areas and explore why you are attached or afraid. Write it down if it helps. Get rid of it // Then, clean house. Are you attached to shopping or acquiring? Perhaps it's time for a spending freeze. Are you in habitual mortal sin? That has to go. Are you striving for praise from others? Time for some mortification. Of course, there are good and even holy things in our lives that we cannot "get rid of" nor should we. But if we find ourselves attached to them, it's time to admit it and ask Jesus to help us rightly order our loves. Additionally, it might be time to simplify our lives—our possessions, our schedules, our distractions, and so on. Be honest about what you're trying to control // Be brutally honest about what you're trying to control in life. We often mask a desire for certainty under the cover of stewardship or "common sense." We confuse clingy tightly to our security or relationships or money or health or fertility or position with putting our hand to the plow but we are prone to cross the line between cultivation and control. We are called to be good stewards but the very nature of being a steward means that we don't hold ultimate dictation. In what ways are we striving to? Be with the poor // If we want to most fully respond to the Gospel call to poverty then we must be poor and be with the poor. If we do not know the poor, then we cannot come to know Christ more fully. Wondering where to find the poor? Consider the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. The hungry and homeless and imprisoned and sick and doubtful and sinner and ignorant are the poor we are called to live among and serve. Ask the Lord to show you how to be with the poor to which He has called you. Rejoice in your weakness // Instead of being repulsed by our weaknesses and shortcomings, let's learn to expect, anticipate, and rejoice in them. In this way, we follow the lead of Saint Paul, who understood that this kind of interior poverty means that we will share in the abundance of God's grace. The weaker we are, the more His we can become. That is a cause for celebration. Learn about poverty // Finally, we can learn more about what the Church has taught about poverty through the centuries. Read Happy Are You Poor. Pray through All She Had. Teach your children what it means to live a life of spiritual poverty. Don't let poverty remain a nice thought that we never enact or set aside for those who are called to radical sainthood. That's us! Let's do our due diligence and seek the Lord's Heart for our interior poverty. Will you join me in praying through this idea of spiritual poverty? It's perfect for Lent; let's not delay.   [bctt tweet="What It Looks Like to Become Interiorly Poor #BISblog //" via="no"]   This post contains affiliate links. Thanks so much for supporting the ministry of Blessed is She!

Years ago, shortly after my grandfather died, I asked my grandma how she was doing and what it was like to wake up everyday without him. She amazed me with a response I didn't expect, and she spoke so simply and matter-of-fact.

I was going for an afternoon walk with a friend when she was telling me about a conversation she had with her spiritual director. The Priest had asked her, “Out of the three theological virtues (faith, hope, and love) which virtue do you feel the weakest in?â€