There’s something heroic that happens when your toes converge with the edge of fear, when they graze the line between safety and all-out war. But it doesn’t feel that way, does it? That heroic moment get stifled underneath the “what ifs” and the unknowns and the second guesses. But you jump. You jump because you must. You jump because of the maybe. You jump because of Him. And you see nothing but dirt beneath your feet. You see nothing but the crash landing and the broken bones. But you jump, and sometimes that’s all it takes.
“Take up [your] cross daily and follow me,” He says. And that’s it—that’s the moment fear grapples for your heart. Because that’s the moment we lose all control. That’s the moment we are called to jump after Him. And while you focus on the fall into the unknown, you forget that you might fly. You forget about the sun and the clouds and the breeze, because you see only the soil and the fear and the plummet.
“. . . deny [yourself],” He says. That’s when you grasp even tighter to that ledge, fearing the uneasiness that follows such a difficult request.
I have been on that ledge so many times, looking down at the steep drop into trust. But I see it so clearly now, how each plunge into the unknown landed us right where we were meant to be. I fought them all—the falls. When my toes brushed the edge of fear, they grasped so tightly to the safety of the dirt beneath them that they nearly developed permanent blisters. Looking back now I see that we had to fall. We had to fall deep into Him. Because each of those falls landed us in a specific place for a specific purpose. And though scary, I count it all worth it—all of the jumps, all of the fear, all of the unknowns. They were all worth it because they were all a part of God’s perfect plan.
“Life with Christ is a wonderful adventure,” wrote Pope Saint John Paul II, and it’s an adventure worth taking.
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Jumping is scary. Do it anyway.
Brittany Calavitta is an enthusiastic advocate for a good book, strong coffee, and a hopeful heart. She currently resides in Irvine, California with her hipster husband and overweight Chihuahua. You can find out more about her here.